if you had the above avatar tied up in your basement

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Magnatek

A Miserable Pile of Honesty
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I don't have a basement, so I'd just untie them, maybe show them around campus, and send them on their way, since they can't use my school's wireless, due to new security.
 

Timotei

The Return of T-Bomb
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Put on some HBO. Hopefully I could get someone to talk about Boardwalk Empire with me.