if you had the above avatar tied up in your basement

[TheDoctor455]

"Access to Protoss DNA for experimental purposes... including making a Protoss/Zerg hybrid"

NO! YOU FOOL! Take that out of the treaty! Even if you do make one, it will destroy us all!

Hey that wasn't me that was Duran. Promise!

OT: I'll have you deliver this package to the Doom-planet.

All right then (Psionically erases offending bit in the fine print)
Other than that... it all looks okay... though... if I might make an informal request... let's kill Duran before he gets too far into that.

 

[AwesomeExpress]

I'd get you to recite Shakespeare to me every night.

 

[Yureina]

I'd get you to read me the books in my room that I cannot be asked to take the time to read myself. x_x

 

[Scde2]

I'd cry and tell you about my troubles.

 

[AwesomeExpress]

I'd give you more troubles.

 

[TheDoctor455]

I would hire the entire company to be my non-Protoss spies.
No one would suspect.

 

[Admiral Stukov]

Let's go nuke Duran!

 

[xmbts]

They aren't for show they charge her ass-kicking batteries...in fact I'm almost certain I explained this on the page before this.

And I'll play mario party 2 with her, does that count as harmless?

And damn you Mr. ninja admiral I will leave you tied up for this. *angry face*

 

[TheDoctor455]

They aren't for show they charge her ass-kicking batteries...in fact I'm almost certain I explained this on the page before this.

And I'll play mario party 2 with her, does that count as harmless?

Close enough.

Now then... any ideas on how she got solid?

 

[AgDr_ODST]

[color=sky blue]Cortana: Im in no position to be picky....anything will do. Now how may I go about repaying you for being so kind? No worries Doc take as long as you need to deal with them[/color]

Its no trouble at all.
Now... do you remember anything... anything at all about how you got here? Or how you seem to have gained a physical form?

Ehh... I shouldn't pry... it was probably quite traumatic... but... if you want to talk... I'll listen.

As for repaying me.... that isn't necessary... but if you really want to... if you insist... no.... we'll save it for when you're feeling better.

EDIT:
It seems we have a guest in a top hat... how odd. (unites)
Now... how did you get here?

[color=sky blue]Cortana: I remember standing on my Holopad watching John sleep in his cryotube as I often did when I wasn't managing the power levels or sending out the distress beacons. I did this for about a year before a bright almost violent flash of light engulfed the Dawn, I started to feel weak and 'sick to my stomach' as I thought an EMP blast was gonna kill us both before I blacked out. When I woke I was laying on the ground suddenly solid but before I could marvel at this wonderful occurance I noticed John was nowhere to be seen. I moved to go find him when someone attacked me from behind.....After that I woke up here. [/color]

Huh...
I'll be making a full inquiry into my staff to see if any of them attacked you.

Or it could have been Mengsk... but why would he put you on my ship?

Or even... how could he...

oh well..

OH! I almost forgot, I brought you some clothes and some books to read. I didn't know your size, so I just got you a one-size-fits all ceremonial Protoss robe... it might be a bit big for a... Terran? But it should keep you warm. I have also given you some preliminary access to our databases... star maps, entertainment, news. To catch you up, and see if you recognize anything on our charts.

[color=sky blue]Well when you find who attacked me let me know. *ducks away to change before coming back out* its a suprisingly good fit. I'll give the databases a once over momentarily. But before I do I've gotta ask..*smiles* How do I look?[/color]

It may just be the blue skin... but you look a bit like a young Protoss... and... that's odd... I didn't notice until now, but your eyes are glowing... a little bluish... of course, a young Protoss doesn't have legs like that... and none of us have "mouths" or "ears" or "noses". Yet I find your appearance oddly pleasing.

(an hour passes)

Well... I've mentally scanned all of my soldiers, and none of them attacked you or know who did... so that's a dead end.

Well... there is one other option... but... I'll need DNA samples from you... if I can determine how you became solid, I might be able to work out who made you solid...
I may also be able to tell if you are actually human. I have a theory about how you got to be solid... but let's see what the results turn up... if you are comfortable with me taking a DNA sample, that is.

OT:
I'll get to you in a minute Best.

[color=sky blue]
Cortana: Well if I look anything like I did when I was a Hologram Im almost a dead ringer for a younger version of my creator/"mother"....*the compliment registers* why thank you *smiles again*
Well thats good I wouldn't want thier to be tension with your ranks over me, as for the sample...I can do that *winces as she plucks a hairs* well this be enough? *holds out the hairs*[/color]

Yes, that should work... though... if my suspicions are correct... I might also need a saliva sample... here, spit into this cup, please.

Inquiries have continued, but so far... nothing.

However, I do have one theory about how you became solid...
I think that someone made this body before-hand, and your personality... mind... was downloaded into this body. This body could be robotic... but (holds Cortana's hands in my own)... hmm... no... a robotic body wouldn't have that kind of warmth... or that kind of pulse...

hmm... I might be a while... I'm in the process of negotiations with the UED.

[color=sky blue]Cortana: not a problem...*spits into the cup and puts the lid on it* As for the theories go though Im fairly certain at the least in a very realistic android body if Im not entirely human as I suspect...given how I was able to eat some *insert whatever protoss eat* that I found while I was changing. What about the UED? Who are they?[/color]

 

[Admiral Stukov]

I am the UED, thats who!

 

[xmbts]

Spoiler: Now who do I know that makes advanced techno-organic monstrosities?

Hmm, not ringing any bells.

 

[Windsaver]

Without the wires?

 

[AgDr_ODST]

I am the UED, thats who!

shut it! I wasn't talking to you!!! *puts cattle prod to stukov's nuts*



OT:[color=sky blue]Cortana: do you see any wires on me? *gestures to her perfect figure*[/color]

 

[Yureina]

So... what kind of blue hair dye do you use?

 

[AgDr_ODST]

[color=sky blue]Cortana: Its all natural...believe it or not...[/color]

 

[TheDoctor455]

[color=sky blue]Cortana: Im in no position to be picky....anything will do. Now how may I go about repaying you for being so kind? No worries Doc take as long as you need to deal with them[/color]

Its no trouble at all.
Now... do you remember anything... anything at all about how you got here? Or how you seem to have gained a physical form?

Ehh... I shouldn't pry... it was probably quite traumatic... but... if you want to talk... I'll listen.

As for repaying me.... that isn't necessary... but if you really want to... if you insist... no.... we'll save it for when you're feeling better.

EDIT:
It seems we have a guest in a top hat... how odd. (unites)
Now... how did you get here?

[color=sky blue]Cortana: I remember standing on my Holopad watching John sleep in his cryotube as I often did when I wasn't managing the power levels or sending out the distress beacons. I did this for about a year before a bright almost violent flash of light engulfed the Dawn, I started to feel weak and 'sick to my stomach' as I thought an EMP blast was gonna kill us both before I blacked out. When I woke I was laying on the ground suddenly solid but before I could marvel at this wonderful occurance I noticed John was nowhere to be seen. I moved to go find him when someone attacked me from behind.....After that I woke up here. [/color]

Huh...
I'll be making a full inquiry into my staff to see if any of them attacked you.

Or it could have been Mengsk... but why would he put you on my ship?

Or even... how could he...

oh well..

OH! I almost forgot, I brought you some clothes and some books to read. I didn't know your size, so I just got you a one-size-fits all ceremonial Protoss robe... it might be a bit big for a... Terran? But it should keep you warm. I have also given you some preliminary access to our databases... star maps, entertainment, news. To catch you up, and see if you recognize anything on our charts.

[color=sky blue]Well when you find who attacked me let me know. *ducks away to change before coming back out* its a suprisingly good fit. I'll give the databases a once over momentarily. But before I do I've gotta ask..*smiles* How do I look?[/color]

It may just be the blue skin... but you look a bit like a young Protoss... and... that's odd... I didn't notice until now, but your eyes are glowing... a little bluish... of course, a young Protoss doesn't have legs like that... and none of us have "mouths" or "ears" or "noses". Yet I find your appearance oddly pleasing.

(an hour passes)

Well... I've mentally scanned all of my soldiers, and none of them attacked you or know who did... so that's a dead end.

Well... there is one other option... but... I'll need DNA samples from you... if I can determine how you became solid, I might be able to work out who made you solid...
I may also be able to tell if you are actually human. I have a theory about how you got to be solid... but let's see what the results turn up... if you are comfortable with me taking a DNA sample, that is.

OT:
I'll get to you in a minute Best.

[color=sky blue]
Cortana: Well if I look anything like I did when I was a Hologram Im almost a dead ringer for a younger version of my creator/"mother"....*the compliment registers* why thank you *smiles again*
Well thats good I wouldn't want thier to be tension with your ranks over me, as for the sample...I can do that *winces as she plucks a hairs* well this be enough? *holds out the hairs*[/color]

Yes, that should work... though... if my suspicions are correct... I might also need a saliva sample... here, spit into this cup, please.

Inquiries have continued, but so far... nothing.

However, I do have one theory about how you became solid...
I think that someone made this body before-hand, and your personality... mind... was downloaded into this body. This body could be robotic... but (holds Cortana's hands in my own)... hmm... no... a robotic body wouldn't have that kind of warmth... or that kind of pulse...

hmm... I might be a while... I'm in the process of negotiations with the UED.

[color=sky blue]Cortana: not a problem...*spits into the cup and puts the lid on it* As for the theories go though Im fairly certain at the least in a very realistic android body if Im not entirely human as I suspect...given how I was able to eat some *insert whatever protoss eat* that I found while I was changing. What about the UED? Who are they?[/color]

Thank you for the sample. Now, while I wait for the results...
The Protoss don't eat, we get our nutrition from inhaling certain gases. But since we started our alliance with the Terrans, we have installed some food synthesizers on all new ships, for an occasion like this.
The UED apparently stands for the United Earth Directorate. They've come a long way to accomplish their goals here in the Kroprolu sector. I was negotiating with the UED, to at least minimize their impact on Protoss space, and to possibly forge an alliance to oust Emperor Mengsk and his Dominion... he would resist any effort to defeat the Zerg.
The Zerg are like the Flood you faced in your sector, only much, much worse. (sorry, I had to scan your mind before I woke you up to determine if you would be hostile or not)

(ding)

Ah, the DNA analysis is in and...

well... you aren't human... not quite... but you aren't an android either... hmm...
(runs a quick tech scan on Cortana)... hmm... not even trace amounts of cybernetics... your body may have been engineered, but it is completely organic...
(looks more closely at DNA results)

Oh my...
You seem to be a human/Protoss hybrid... but the only one that I know of that would even attempt such an experiment is... Duran. (growls the name out)

Well... now I think we know who made the body, who attacked you, and left you here.... but why?

Hmm... I hate to ask this... and I wouldn't if the need weren't dire... but I'll need to run a deep scan on your mind... on a normal Protoss, there are no adverse affects... but on a human... well... it ranges from severe migraines to crippling physical pain to insanity... and in some cases... death.

But since you're a hybrid... I have no idea what will happen.

I will understand if you don't want to go through a deep scan like this, but you will have to accept that if don't let me scan you, I will be forced to keep you in here permanently, and surrounded by a platoon of my Zealots at all times.

You see... there is only one logical reason why Duran would "make" you, and then leave you on my ship...
I need to perform the scan to see if there are any surprises hidden in your subconscious, and if possible, correct them.

I am sorry.

 

[xmbts]

@TheDoctor
Oh, so you figured it out eh?
*voice changes subtly as head rotates 360 degrees*

Spoiler: Well I cant let you do go any further.

Spoiler: Now you will-*whirring*

Thunk

[sub]Dammit[/sub]

 

[AgDr_ODST]

[color=sky blue]Cortana: Im in no position to be picky....anything will do. Now how may I go about repaying you for being so kind? No worries Doc take as long as you need to deal with them[/color]

Its no trouble at all.
Now... do you remember anything... anything at all about how you got here? Or how you seem to have gained a physical form?

Ehh... I shouldn't pry... it was probably quite traumatic... but... if you want to talk... I'll listen.

As for repaying me.... that isn't necessary... but if you really want to... if you insist... no.... we'll save it for when you're feeling better.

EDIT:
It seems we have a guest in a top hat... how odd. (unites)
Now... how did you get here?

[color=sky blue]Cortana: I remember standing on my Holopad watching John sleep in his cryotube as I often did when I wasn't managing the power levels or sending out the distress beacons. I did this for about a year before a bright almost violent flash of light engulfed the Dawn, I started to feel weak and 'sick to my stomach' as I thought an EMP blast was gonna kill us both before I blacked out. When I woke I was laying on the ground suddenly solid but before I could marvel at this wonderful occurance I noticed John was nowhere to be seen. I moved to go find him when someone attacked me from behind.....After that I woke up here. [/color]

Huh...
I'll be making a full inquiry into my staff to see if any of them attacked you.

Or it could have been Mengsk... but why would he put you on my ship?

Or even... how could he...

oh well..

OH! I almost forgot, I brought you some clothes and some books to read. I didn't know your size, so I just got you a one-size-fits all ceremonial Protoss robe... it might be a bit big for a... Terran? But it should keep you warm. I have also given you some preliminary access to our databases... star maps, entertainment, news. To catch you up, and see if you recognize anything on our charts.

[color=sky blue]Well when you find who attacked me let me know. *ducks away to change before coming back out* its a suprisingly good fit. I'll give the databases a once over momentarily. But before I do I've gotta ask..*smiles* How do I look?[/color]

It may just be the blue skin... but you look a bit like a young Protoss... and... that's odd... I didn't notice until now, but your eyes are glowing... a little bluish... of course, a young Protoss doesn't have legs like that... and none of us have "mouths" or "ears" or "noses". Yet I find your appearance oddly pleasing.

(an hour passes)

Well... I've mentally scanned all of my soldiers, and none of them attacked you or know who did... so that's a dead end.

Well... there is one other option... but... I'll need DNA samples from you... if I can determine how you became solid, I might be able to work out who made you solid...
I may also be able to tell if you are actually human. I have a theory about how you got to be solid... but let's see what the results turn up... if you are comfortable with me taking a DNA sample, that is.

OT:
I'll get to you in a minute Best.

[color=sky blue]
Cortana: Well if I look anything like I did when I was a Hologram Im almost a dead ringer for a younger version of my creator/"mother"....*the compliment registers* why thank you *smiles again*
Well thats good I wouldn't want thier to be tension with your ranks over me, as for the sample...I can do that *winces as she plucks a hairs* well this be enough? *holds out the hairs*[/color]

Yes, that should work... though... if my suspicions are correct... I might also need a saliva sample... here, spit into this cup, please.

Inquiries have continued, but so far... nothing.

However, I do have one theory about how you became solid...
I think that someone made this body before-hand, and your personality... mind... was downloaded into this body. This body could be robotic... but (holds Cortana's hands in my own)... hmm... no... a robotic body wouldn't have that kind of warmth... or that kind of pulse...

hmm... I might be a while... I'm in the process of negotiations with the UED.

[color=sky blue]Cortana: not a problem...*spits into the cup and puts the lid on it* As for the theories go though Im fairly certain at the least in a very realistic android body if Im not entirely human as I suspect...given how I was able to eat some *insert whatever protoss eat* that I found while I was changing. What about the UED? Who are they?[/color]

Thank you for the sample. Now, while I wait for the results...
The Protoss don't eat, we get our nutrition from inhaling certain gases. But since we started our alliance with the Terrans, we have installed some food synthesizers on all new ships, for an occasion like this.
The UED apparently stands for the United Earth Directorate. They've come a long way to accomplish their goals here in the Kroprolu sector. I was negotiating with the UED, to at least minimize their impact on Protoss space, and to possibly forge an alliance to oust Emperor Mengsk and his Dominion... he would resist any effort to defeat the Zerg.
The Zerg are like the Flood you faced in your sector, only much, much worse. (sorry, I had to scan your mind before I woke you up to determine if you would be hostile or not)

(ding)

Ah, the DNA analysis is in and...

well... you aren't human... not quite... but you aren't an android either... hmm...
(runs a quick tech scan on Cortana)... hmm... not even trace amounts of cybernetics... your body may have been engineered, but it is completely organic...
(looks more closely at DNA results)

Oh my...
You seem to be a human/Protoss hybrid... but the only one that I know of that would even attempt such an experiment is... Duran. (growls the name out)

Well... now I think we know who made the body, who attacked you, and left you here.... but why?

Hmm... I hate to ask this... and I wouldn't if the need weren't dire... but I'll need to run a deep scan on your mind... on a normal Protoss, there are no adverse affects... but on a human... well... it ranges from severe migraines to crippling physical pain to insanity... and in some cases... death.

But since you're a hybrid... I have no idea what will happen.

I will understand if you don't want to go through a deep scan like this, but you will have to accept that if don't let me scan you, I will be forced to keep you in here permanently, and surrounded by a platoon of my Zealots at all times.

You see... there is only one logical reason why Duran would "make" you, and then leave you on my ship...
I need to perform the scan to see if there are any surprises hidden in your subconscious, and if possible, correct them.

I am sorry.

[color=sky blue]*Cortana is visbly overwhelmed by all the revelations about the zerg and her body and the Docs admission about the scan..but she continues on anyway*
Cortana: Well whatever I ate isn't bothering my stomach...thats good I guess...
As for this UED from what I've read they seem to bare a striking similarity to the UNSC where Im from.
But enough of that if these Zerg are worse than the Flood what can be done?, can the 'queen of blades' according to your files who leads them be reasoned with?
But how is it possible to make me into a 'hybrid' before I was just an AI....a highly advanced one but still...just hours ago. What feels more like days I was looking through my hologram projected hand as I watched over John.
Now Im not exactly happy about this scan it but it seems I've no other option if I intend to help you or atleast move freely about the space you've provided me. I don't get it though what could "Duran" gain by doing all of this? Why would he do it? *starts to lose her composure again and turn a pale shade of blue* [/color]

 

[Admiral Stukov]

There can be no reasoning with the self-titled Queen ***** of the Universe.
The same goes for the filthy traitor Duran. Orbital bombardment is the only solution.