If you were jesus, how would you go about things?

[Queen Michael]

One word: Batman.

 

[Arkynomicon]

With the ability of hindsight I would not form my shoddy religion that made people do some pretty stupid crap during the next 2000 years.

 

[Toaster Hunter]

Spend my time explaining "no I never said that."

 

[retterkl]

When doing things I would probably think 'What would Jesus do' and then i'd be stuck in an ever descending thought bubble.

 

[the D0rk One]

Convert the world's water supply to wine.

convert to Super mecha deathchrist version 4.0 beta
http://i188.photobucket.com/albums/z248/InvaderTAK42/Angry%20Video%20Game%20Nerd/Super_Mecha_Death_Christ_2000_by_mi.jpg
All sins shall be forgiven... FORCEFULLY!!!

that about sumz it up.

Oh, and whenever an atheist piece of shit brings up the topic of My existence, I'd do the deathchrist mecha miracle again =))

 

[Bernzz]

I wouldn't reveal myself, for reasons stated by other members already. I wouldn't call non-believers sinners or anything like that, and I wouldn't be the perfect Jesus the crazy ones desired. So I might be killed? Imprisoned by the government? What have you.

 

[Cazza]

What Would Gordon Freeman Do?

Would be the first thing in my head.

I would do secret healings. Walk past an old man with back pain? BAM the pain is gone. Then after a while walk into a hospital and mass heal.

 

[Wintermoot]

sell extremely cheap wine and get rich on it.
(if I can also heal the sick) become rich on the cure for cancer!

 

[Ladette]

I think this guy has the right idea.

 

[NoeL]

As for your first, I'm almost certain that Jesus was a universalist. The idea of Christian-exclusive salvation doesn't even appear in the Bible until after he died.

Pretty sure you got that the wrong way around. Jesus was the one that said through him was the only way to heaven, and Paul was responsible for opening up Christianity to the gentiles.

 

[Merkavar]

if im jesus back in the 0bc times i would do miricles to more people than just a small group in the middle east. you know give everyone the opportunity to find god instead of leaving large groups of people out of the loop for 1300-1700 years

if im jesus now a days i would perform the normal miricles, healing the sick etc and get every one to be the one religion

 

[varulfic]

[sub]That pun was unintentional[/sub]

[sub]...what pun?[/sub]


I'm not a very inspiring leader, so I'd probably just use my powers and celebrity status to pick up chicks.

 

[Woodsey]

I would denounce all religion, and use my magic powers to do it.

Then I'd get exceptionally pissed on water.

 

[varulfic]

I would denounce all religion, and use my magic powers to do it.

Then I'd get exceptionally pissed on water.

Yeah, that'll go over fine. "I am Jesus Christ, the son of Almighty God and I am here to tell you... religion is bullshit! Watch as I use my magical power to prove to you the superiority of atheism and the scientific method."

 

[Woodsey]

I would denounce all religion, and use my magic powers to do it.

Then I'd get exceptionally pissed on water.

Yeah, that'll go over fine. "I am Jesus Christ, the son of Almighty God and I am here to tell you... religion is bullshit! Watch as I use my magical power to prove to you the superiority of atheism and the scientific method."

Nah, I meant use my magic powers to subvert all that and persuade them. And then to the drinking!

 

[OmniscientOstrich]

Spend my time explaining "no I never said that."

This, a thousand times this. Also, in regard to the cross iconography: 'Seriously guys cut that shit out, do you think JFK would want his memento to be in the shape of a sniper rifle?'

 

[Dark Knifer]

[sub]That pun was unintentional[/sub]

[sub]...what pun?[/sub]


I'm not a very inspiring leader, so I'd probably just use my powers and celebrity status to pick up chicks.

At the end of my post I said what would you do as Jesus. There is a popular saying in Christianity saying what would Jesus do... So yeah...

 

[staika]

I'd do whatever I want because I'd have the perfect excuse to explain my actions.

"why would you do that!?!?"
"I'm FUCKING Jesus, I do what I want!"

I fell like such a bad christian for saying that but whatever.

 

[Tartarga]

I would start a great campaign to punch douchebags in the face, because if you get punched in the face by Jesus then you know your doing something wrong. After that then i'd spend all my time walking on water.