If you were to commit a murder, where would it be?
- Thread starter icypain
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Wyoming. The only place I can think of that has fewer people living in it than have ever been to the goddamned moon.icypain said:
Seriously, if you've never been, you wouldn't understand. You can toss a body over the slight rolling hill about 15 feet away from the interstate, and NOBODY WOULD EVER FIND IT.
Okay, that's just pure genius. I salute you!FalloutJack said:
You're always gonna have problems lifting a body in one piece. Apparently the best thing to do is cut up a corpse into six pieces and pile it all together.
And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".
And when you got your six pieces, you gotta get rid of them, because it's no good leaving it in the deep freeze for your mum to discover, now is it? Then I hear the best thing to do is feed them to pigs. You got to starve the pigs for a few days, then the sight of a chopped-up body will look like curry to a pisshead. You gotta shave the heads of your victims, and pull the teeth out for the sake of the piggies' digestion. You could do this afterwards, of course, but you don't want to go sievin' through pig shit, now do you? They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".
Actually I have met someone from North Dakota. And I've been there... As depressing as it is, Wyoming is worse. It'd sad when the university football stadium, when filled to capacity, becomes the third largest town in the state by itself.
Personally, I'd do it in a foreign country, probably somewhere in Africa or South America. Seems like the easiest reasonable place to kill someone and not get caught. Siberia or North Canada would also be effective I believe.
Personally, I'd do it in a foreign country, probably somewhere in Africa or South America. Seems like the easiest reasonable place to kill someone and not get caught. Siberia or North Canada would also be effective I believe.
I would be honoured to be an accessory to this murder.gothicboris said:On Youtube for all to see as i torture and finally kill Jedward
OT- The local airsoft range. I could shoot someone with a silenced pistol in there and no one would know who fired the shot.
Seriously or comedically?
Because I put quite a lot of thought and research into committing murder for a book I was writing. It has to be somewhere close enough that you can commute easily by method of easily accessed public transport, ie, train, bus, taxi, not a place you can be easily picked out of a lineup, which pretty much discounts taxi, and is far enough away to not be an obvious choice in a police search, which would also rule out the bus.
It would have to be a major city, preferably with a high rate of crime already, which for Britain would mean London, Manchester, Leeds, Birmingham (there is a list). The major city makes it harder to track an individual immediately before or after the murder, and also means that there would be more trains (as mentioned above) leaving more frequently, so it would make it a nigh impossible task. And the high rate of crime, particularly if you went to somewhere like London, would mean that there would be less interest in your particular murder.
Choose a group that no one cares about, who have murders happen all the time, which for the purposes of this argument would probably be a black teenager or young adult in the East End of London, kill them quietly when they're in an alley in the early hours of the morning. Between 2-4 am would probably be the best time, before the night shifts get off and the morning shifts wake up, but after the time most of the clubs have turned out. It has to be utterly random, with no time spent leaving distinguishing marks or messages, while you wear gloves and some sort of cover-all suit.
Remove the suit and ball it up into a bag, the murder weapon (best if it's a knife) goes in the Thames, the bad and suit need to be burned, and again London has lots of nice quiet places you could do this, hop on the first train out, and bam, perfect murder, you're not even remotely a suspect, because you don't even live in the same city.
Comedically, I'd kill someone through the internet, just so Christopher Walken could investigate my case. (If anyone gets that reference they get a video)
Because I put quite a lot of thought and research into committing murder for a book I was writing. It has to be somewhere close enough that you can commute easily by method of easily accessed public transport, ie, train, bus, taxi, not a place you can be easily picked out of a lineup, which pretty much discounts taxi, and is far enough away to not be an obvious choice in a police search, which would also rule out the bus.
It would have to be a major city, preferably with a high rate of crime already, which for Britain would mean London, Manchester, Leeds, Birmingham (there is a list). The major city makes it harder to track an individual immediately before or after the murder, and also means that there would be more trains (as mentioned above) leaving more frequently, so it would make it a nigh impossible task. And the high rate of crime, particularly if you went to somewhere like London, would mean that there would be less interest in your particular murder.
Choose a group that no one cares about, who have murders happen all the time, which for the purposes of this argument would probably be a black teenager or young adult in the East End of London, kill them quietly when they're in an alley in the early hours of the morning. Between 2-4 am would probably be the best time, before the night shifts get off and the morning shifts wake up, but after the time most of the clubs have turned out. It has to be utterly random, with no time spent leaving distinguishing marks or messages, while you wear gloves and some sort of cover-all suit.
Remove the suit and ball it up into a bag, the murder weapon (best if it's a knife) goes in the Thames, the bad and suit need to be burned, and again London has lots of nice quiet places you could do this, hop on the first train out, and bam, perfect murder, you're not even remotely a suspect, because you don't even live in the same city.
Comedically, I'd kill someone through the internet, just so Christopher Walken could investigate my case. (If anyone gets that reference they get a video)