I'm a fairly conservative guy, but I am still flabergasted by people who think gay is a choice

[mike1921]

There's a difference between choosing to be gay and choosing to do gay things.

Eating that pizza or not is a choice. But whether you like it or not isn't. Is it that hard?

Right so people know they are gay without doing gay things? How do you know if you like something without first trying it?

Are you really saying that because your mind might give an attraction to men that is grounds to set out a life path without having to think about it or consider it at all because you have no say in it?

Cause last I checked theres a lot of cases of guys who have had girlfriends, didn't like it and then decided maybe girls were the wrong choice.

And "is it that hard?"... really? That's what you say to someone stating their opinion?

I don't know about you, but I know I want to have sex with and be in relationships with girls without ever being in one (one referring to both a girl and a relationship, heh heh).

Yes, you worded it terribly but yes. The only alternative is people attracted to others of the same sex go out with people of the opposite sex they have no attraction to. That's the only alternative to not being with people your mind. Also, since when were desires not enough to take on a life course?

Just because you can't change what you want doesn't mean you can't originally go with the popular choice you don't realize you don't want.

Yes that's what I say. Because anyone who thinks a preference is a choice apparently have difficulties understanding the meaning of the word "choice"

 

[Something Amyss]

LOL at what I've highlighted. No point debating with someone who doesn't need evidence.

While it was amusing, the fact that asking 1000 people would yield with few to no "choice" results is evidence in itself. So the diction is amusing, but belies the point.

Right so people know they are gay without doing gay things? How do you know if you like something without first trying it?

Because "gay" isn't just about sex. And since one can have sexual attraction without having sex, how would one need to try it?

The instance you mention can readily be explained by societal conditioning. Many gays try to be with girls, not so much because they want to, but because they're trying to hide or ovverride their own sexuality. There are a couple of mental conditions that explain the contrary, too.

Being gay is not a choice for some..

However its a completely different story for others.
It is a choice to act camp, hell some even dress like women. That is a choice?

I find it pathetic how these days on tv everybody becoming newly famous is apparently gay.

Some of the JLS members say they are bi-sexual.
I highly doubt it, its just publicity.

Some people choose to be gay, some have no choice in the matter.

Except "camp" is not gay. Dressing in women's clothing is also not gay. Heterosexuals do both. The idea that these are "gay" is on par with saying "cooking is for women and sports are for men." Even if you consider the two examples true in general, they do not pan out very well outside of gross exaggerations. By that definition, some of the "gayest" things ever come from the minds of completely heterosexual people.

 

[Asuka Soryu]

To everyone who's questioning if it's a choice:

When did you decide to be straight?

I'd say after puberty? xD

 

[Asuka Soryu]

Suppose gayness isn't a choice, if there was a cure made for it. Wouldn't that create it as a choice? The moment you introduce a way to change, choice comes into play. And even more, isn't it a choice to love someone? To be turned on is one thing, but it's a choice to find someone you want to share your love with. You're not born loving everyone of the sex you're interested in.


But then, perhaps choice doesn't exist. Perhaps we're all pawns to Destiny, with no such thing as free will. Just the illusion of 'choice'.

Heh. ;3

 

[Mozza444]

Being gay is not a choice for some..

However its a completely different story for others.
It is a choice to act camp, hell some even dress like women. That is a choice?

I find it pathetic how these days on tv everybody becoming newly famous is apparently gay.

Some of the JLS members say they are bi-sexual.
I highly doubt it, its just publicity.

Some people choose to be gay, some have no choice in the matter.

Except "camp" is not gay. Dressing in women's clothing is also not gay. Heterosexuals do both. The idea that these are "gay" is on par with saying "cooking is for women and sports are for men." Even if you consider the two examples true in general, they do not pan out very well outside of gross exaggerations. By that definition, some of the "gayest" things ever come from the minds of completely heterosexual people.

I never said gay = camp..

I said quite the opposite, please re-read what i said.

It clearly says.. Gay is not a choice.
To act camp pretty much is.

 

[Spark Ignition]

You don't choose sexuality, you don't choose what you like.

That's true (in most cases) but the same is unfortunately true of beliefs. There are many people who literally could never imagine themselves being attracted to people of the same gender (I'm like this), and unfortunately some of the less imaginative of this type find it hard to imagine a state of affairs where they could be born with this attraction, look at the rest of the world and see most people appear to be, like them, unambiguously heterosexual, and deduce incorrectly that all people are indeed made equal and any variation is a matter of choice on our part. Since this belief is the cornerstone of almost all contemporary religions you naturally find more people who think like this in conservative/ fundamentalist religious communities.

This opens up a whole debate on free will vs conditioning & cause/effect which I'm not going to go into, but suffice to say while I in no way believe that 'gay is a choice' I understand why some people believe that, and as long as they are open to discussion and not neccessarily prejudiced against gay people because of it I won't begrudge them their opinion.

 

[Something Amyss]

Except "camp" is not gay. Dressing in women's clothing is also not gay. Heterosexuals do both. The idea that these are "gay" is on par with saying "cooking is for women and sports are for men." Even if you consider the two examples true in general, they do not pan out very well outside of gross exaggerations. By that definition, some of the "gayest" things ever come from the minds of completely heterosexual people.

I never said gay = camp..

I said quite the opposite, please re-read what i said.

It clearly says.. Gay is not a choice.
To act camp pretty much is.[/quote]

It doesn't clearly say that. Sorry. You said it was not a choice for some, and then said it was a completely different story for others. You then went and talked about camp in the next portion with no segway, which is either a great way to equate camp with "gay" and those people for whom it is "A different story" or a very poor way to say the opposite.

You then chastised people for claiming to be gay.

Now, what you might have MEANT to say is that gay isn't choice, but you wrote something completely different. I did not read your intentions; your intent was not posted here, your words were. Your words explicitly say gay is not a choice. For SOME.

Some people choose to be gay, some have no choice in the matter.

And I addressed that. So please don't tell me to re-read what you wrote. Perhaps you need to re-read it.

 

[RamirezDoEverything]

*Oh this thread again*

I don't understand it either, gay is gay, what the hell is the big deal?
Gay and straight are 2 different sexual preferences
Christianity and Judaism are religious preferences
We use to persecute religion
The 'persecution' of gays will eventually quit, just wait my friends.

 

[cynicalprophet]

I don't understand why it matters if its a choice or not, it shouldn't require justification at this point in our society. I personally feel that its likely both, some people born with it or a genetic predisposition to it, and some people choose it. They find the appeal in their own gender and decide (consciously or not) that it is more to their liking, or that both genders are, or that it changes with their mood. I'm pretty sure that humans are sexually complicated enough to make a choice to have sex with, and be sexually attracted to someone of their own gender.
I don't believe that all alcoholics inherited it even though there is strong evidence suggesting that genetics have a role in it.

 

[Mozza444]

It doesn't clearly say that. Sorry. You said it was not a choice for some, and then said it was a completely different story for others. You then went and talked about camp in the next portion with no segway, which is either a great way to equate camp with "gay" and those people for whom it is "A different story" or a very poor way to say the opposite.

You then chastised people for claiming to be gay.

Now, what you might have MEANT to say is that gay isn't choice, but you wrote something completely different. I did not read your intentions; your intent was not posted here, your words were. Your words explicitly say gay is not a choice. For SOME.

Some people choose to be gay, some have no choice in the matter.

And I addressed that. So please don't tell me to re-read what you wrote. Perhaps you need to re-read it.

Being gay is not a choice for SOME..
All im saying is, being gay in general is not a choice at all, others choose to be for attention.
Plus i dont even know why your trying to argue?

 

[Olrod]

Being gay can't be a choice because I knew I just preferred looking at naked men, to naked women, since the age of about 4 years old...

 

[Polaris19]

I have had a few friends that are gay or transgendered or both and had talks with them about the human condition and such. And so I convinced gay is not a choice.

I bring this up because my girlfriend just told me she is in a debate with a work friend who still thinks it is a choice. How could it be a choice? I mean logically being gay doesn't make sense. I mean on the down side you are degraded, belittled, and repressed by society. You are stigmatized and grudgingly accepted in most place that don't specifically cater to homosexuals. None of that sounds fun, but on the other down side you can take it in the butt and not get married.

The only real plus side I can see is that you can dress how ever you want, and if someone says you look gay, you can reply, "I know, isn't it great?"

Anyhow, what are your feelings on this?

It CAN be a choice. It might not necessarily be so for everyone, but I feel that as long as you have free will, you've got a say in the matter.

Sometimes it is events in someones life that influences their beliefs or preferences. Sometimes it's the way someone is raised, but for some, they just honestly have decided that they prefer things differently.

As for logic, since when has humanity, at any point in our bleak existence, been logical?

"If a man and a women can be miserable together, why can't two men or two women be blissfully happy?)

 

[Generic_Username]

It's nature. You're born either gay, straight or bi, and even though it MIGHT be a choice for some people, that's mostly (well, there probably have been cases somewhere in history) not the case. It isn't all fun and games, and I don't see why anyone would willingly choose it. TRUST me.

 

[Asuka Soryu]

Suppose gayness isn't a choice, if there was a cure made for it. Wouldn't that create it as a choice? The moment you introduce a way to change, choice comes into play. And even more, isn't it a choice to love someone? To be turned on is one thing, but it's a choice to find someone you want to share your love with. You're not born loving everyone of the sex you're interested in.


But then, perhaps choice doesn't exist. Perhaps we're all pawns to Destiny, with no such thing as free will. Just the illusion of 'choice'.

Heh. ;3

Since you don't seem like a bigot, I'd possibly change the whole *gay cure* thing in your post.

I'm sure you meant nothing by it, but that phrasing kind of makes it look like you think being gay is something that needs to be cured.

-Snickers- Why yes, you did misunderstand me. My comment of a 'cure' was directed towards the topic poster talking of such a cure. Not me saying it is something that can be cured.

 

[RhombusHatesYou]

Thing is...if you started a thread on sharks I am not sure that it would reach 300+ posts over 9 pages.

Don't think I haven't noticed a trend in anti-shark bias on The 'Pist.

 

[Wing Dairu]

Science has not only proven that there is a "gay gene", they have actually IDENTIFIED AND ISOLATED IT. Geneticists know EXACTLY which part of the human genome determines a person's sexual orientation. Can't people get that through their heads? Don't expect the Vatican to get it, though...they've been historically very anti-science.