I'm a lonly bugger.

[Neko Pounce]

Yeah. First of all. I'm british. Sorry.

Anyway. I wanted to ask. How on earth do you acted so assertive and confedent around girls? I mean, I sound childish, but i've allways had problems talking to girls i have feelings for.


There's this one girl i've allways had feelings for, but shes gone out with allmost all of my mates, and i've never had the confiance to even tell her that i really like her. Ever since i've been the guy she talks to for closure, ive felt really close to her, but it's just my problem that i cant tell her...

I'm not really sure why i'm posting this. But i dont know if you guys can help.

 

[Mr.Pandah]

Well..you just gotta say it. Its as simple as that. You have self-confidence issues obviously, so maybe hit the gym and work on your appearance if thats the problem. If you're fine with just speaking to her as a friend, there should be no reason you can't just tell her you like her. The worst that can happen is she says "No, I don't like you that way."

It could be hard to take something like that, especially if shes gotten around to your friends, but its better than never knowing...right?

 

[spartan1077]

Sorry mate, no help here. I was going to post a similar thread though so I'll bookmark it and try and give my two cents.
I think the problem is confidence. Even knowing the girl might like you back, you need to just straighten your back and charge on in. If you can't just text her or something. Once that's sent, you can't unsend it.

 

[BlueberryMUNCH]

Yeah. First of all. I'm british. Sorry.

Anyway. I wanted to ask. How on earth do you acted so assertive and confedent around girls? I mean, I sound childish, but i've allways had problems talking to girls i have feelings for.


There's this one girl i've allways had feelings for, but shes gone out with allmost all of my mates, and i've never had the confiance to even tell her that i really like her. Thing is, shes the same age as me, but shes a bit of a whore. Ever since i've been the guy she talks to for closure, ive felt really close to her, but it's just my problem that i cant tell her...

I'm not really sure why i'm posting this. But i dont know if you guys can help.

HOW DARE YOU BE BRITISH! Haha why the apology for that mate? xD WE SHOULD BE PROUD YEAH>:].

RIGHT, OT TIME *advice pants*

Ah shit, riiiiiight.
Well, just asking, how old are you?
If she really is like you say she is...I think you should just try really hard to be content with being just friends. Trust me, I can just tell that if you two are together it'll end. Badly. Most likely for you:/.

Just try be really good mates with her, like you seem to be atm. Just don't say anything you might regret. I feel like I should really warn you though; if she goes out with a lot of people, especially your friends...she's not really the kind of person that wants a relationship.
Heck, if you're only after a good time, then go for it obviously, but I'm pretty sure you're after something that lasts, right?

My advice- just keep doing what you're doing.
Either way, I wish you the best of luck mate.


EDIT RIGHT, ON THE FLIPSIDE: If your certain this is what you want, then the best way to do it is by text.
Just be like 'Hey, listen, I think over the past few weeks I've started to get to know you a whole lot better, and I think I really, really like you. I don't know if you feel the same, and I probably sound like a right old doofus, but I didn't want to keep it from you. Just like...if you don't feel the same, please, don't let this change our friendship, yeah?'

Or something along those lines haha. As a post a few above this said, once you press send, that's it. Job done.

Let me know what you choose to do and how it goes, yeah? :].

EDITEDIT
|
| This guy is also very right
v

 

[Dragunai]

Yeah. First of all. I'm british. Sorry.

Anyway. I wanted to ask. How on earth do you acted so assertive and confedent around girls? I mean, I sound childish, but i've allways had problems talking to girls i have feelings for.


There's this one girl i've allways had feelings for, but shes gone out with allmost all of my mates, and i've never had the confiance to even tell her that i really like her. Thing is, shes the same age as me, but shes a bit of a whore. Ever since i've been the guy she talks to for closure, ive felt really close to her, but it's just my problem that i cant tell her...

I'm not really sure why i'm posting this. But i dont know if you guys can help.

Seriously what is with the lonely hearts tonight. Your the 3 person in 20 minutes to post a "So theres this girl" style thread.

Ok you want help with this?

1 - get OFF your pc. You wont meet girls here, your not going to develop confidence here and asking 1001 times isnt going to make it magically happen.

2 - Acting confident is as easy as walking into a room with your head held UP like you own the F***ing place because YOU DO and keep telling yourself that.

3 - When talking to her, smile when she says something fun or light hearted. Lock eyes with her but DONT stare her down. Theres a different between eye contact and intimidating a chick. You will have to learn the right balance yourself as that cannot really be taught online.

4 - She has gone out with your friends because THEY had the balls to ask her out. Its that simple. Still how many is "All your mates"? if she has been doing the rounds she might have a virology lab between her thighs and that isnt cool.

5 - If she comes to you for closure then you are either in the friend zone or dangerously close. If you yourself think she is a whore then you do not have the respect you need to forge a relationship and I think your feelings are coming from your crotch not your heart.

So if you do genuinely want to date her:

Stride up to her, YOU are in charge because YOU have the penis. Look her in the eye, make some small talk or dont (players choice) then say to her, "You wanna go out some time?" this is interchangable with "You wanna go for coffee" or "Lunch" its up to you. Apply your own date destination if you feel wild.

GO!

 

[Neko Pounce]

I need to add. Out of all my freinds, i've knew her the longest. 5 years.
We have always been close. And on one drunken night i did end up makeing out with her. That was about 6 months ago. After we both woke up and found out we did that, it did not change anything. We stayed close and everything. But i think it miight be a case of the freindzone

 

[sms_117b]

I have this trouble a lot.

My go around was to stay in my comfort zone until I got to know them well enough I could act like myself, by comfort zone, certain classes (whilst I was in school and helping them with homework), afterward and now when I teach swimming I talk to girls (lifguards on poolside or the adult I'm teaching and I'm really flirty, although this is more to relax them than anything else), University is a comfort zone, and I appear confident over msn/facebook and text messages.

Even with really close friends I feel awkward talking about certain things in certain situations, but they're becoming less frequent as the above is having a compound effect on my overall confidence.

So my advise (if you can call it that) is start talking to this girl in a comfortable area, you'll seem more confident, then you can move to more casual areas.

Be warned this has earned me the "honor" of the friend zone more than once. But it's also got me a relationship I still don't forgive myself for letting end and a fling!

 

[Imp Poster]

Why are you apologizing for being british? just curious.

As for the girl, be proactive in your feelings for her. I sure you can be confident about your feelings for her, right? You do know that you do like her right? You sure? OK, now there are ways of saying you like her without saying you like her. You can show her that you like her. You can tell her what you like about her. All without saying you like her.
Hopefully, she reciprocates you with how she feels.

 

[Dragunai]

She's a whore, like you said.

Stop having feelings for her.

That is all.

I like the way this man thinks!
Its like I said, if you have even thought in all sincerety "She is a whore" you will never be able to take her seriously.

Find a nice pretty girl to... I think Im going to turn that into a signature tbh.

 

[Neko Pounce]

She's a whore, like you said.

Stop having feelings for her.

That is all.

While i have to agree with what you said. It still saddens me.
Ehh, at least your right to the point.

... Might just go get high again

 

[BlueberryMUNCH]

She's a whore, like you said.

Stop having feelings for her.

That is all.

While i have to agree with what you said. It still saddens me.
Ehh, at least your right to the point.

... Might just go get high again

Man up; don't do drugs. Have a few early nights, do some exercise, read a good book, okay?

 

[Zechnophobe]

Yeah. First of all. I'm british. Sorry.

Anyway. I wanted to ask. How on earth do you acted so assertive and confedent around girls? I mean, I sound childish, but i've allways had problems talking to girls i have feelings for.


There's this one girl i've allways had feelings for, but shes gone out with allmost all of my mates, and i've never had the confiance to even tell her that i really like her. Thing is, shes the same age as me, but shes a bit of a whore. Ever since i've been the guy she talks to for closure, ive felt really close to her, but it's just my problem that i cant tell her...

I'm not really sure why i'm posting this. But i dont know if you guys can help.

The comment "she's a bit of a whore" and 'have feelings for' seem mutually exclusive. Maybe it is a British thing. Don't confuse available and permiscuity, for feelings. Those come from your brain not your crotch.

 

[Eogris]

Yeah. First of all. I'm british. Sorry.

Anyway. I wanted to ask. How on earth do you acted so assertive and confedent around girls? I mean, I sound childish, but i've allways had problems talking to girls i have feelings for.


There's this one girl i've allways had feelings for, but shes gone out with allmost all of my mates, and i've never had the confiance to even tell her that i really like her. Thing is, shes the same age as me, but shes a bit of a whore. Ever since i've been the guy she talks to for closure, ive felt really close to her, but it's just my problem that i cant tell her...

I'm not really sure why i'm posting this. But i dont know if you guys can help.

you only live once. is it really that big of a deal? just tell her

 

[Neko Pounce]

While i have to agree with what you said. It still saddens me.
Ehh, at least your right to the point.

... Might just go get high again

I know. Shitsux bro. I feel for you, but it's not doing you any favours to sugar-coat it.

There's plenty of other lasses out there mate. I've got a friend similar to you, and I've actually managed to completely null any and all feeling for her. I'm pretty proud of that.

She's a damn fine looker, too.

You really sound like you know what your talking about. Want to give me some advise on how to block out all feelings? ( Other then booze and such... Only worth temp.)

 

[The Unworthy Gentleman]

Can't help you dude, I'm in a similar boat right now. All I can say is that you need to take action, if you don't then nothing will ever happen. Ever. It's up to you. Hey, what do y'know, I could help you after all. Shame I can't take my own advice, ah wey.

 

[Neko Pounce]

Can't help you dude, I'm in a similar boat right now. All I can say is that you need to take action, if you don't then nothing will ever happen. Ever. It's up to you. Hey, what do y'know, I could help you after all. Shame I can't take my own advice, ah wey.

I know how that is. when ever a mate asks me for advise i'm allways talking as if i'm the expert. But im just a hipocryt.

 

[PrimoThePro]

Snip

Don't be sorry for being British. Brits rule. On to your situation:
You say this girl is a whore, hmm? You say she talks to you for closure? It seems to me like she is already aware of your feelings and is using you as an emotional crutch. Take it from a guy who broke free of the shyness chains and went on to be a romantic. That is your future bud, you will be a romantic. My suggestion is, if you have any sexual tension, wait until you're legal, see if you can start something with this girl, then move on to someone who you think you can form a healthy steady relationship.
You can test to see if she is just using you. Ask her how she feels about one of your friends who she hasn't dated. If she shows interest, take note. Go to that friend, ask him to ask her how she feels about you. If she shows no interest, you are merely a crutch. If she does show interest, something could happen. One thing you have to remember as a shy person, is you have to keep thinking about how you would treat this girl if she were yours. It makes you more confident that you should be the ONE for this girl and that any other guy will do her wrong. Good luck and stick with it my friend.