"I'm Bi"
- Thread starter smallthemouse
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At least where I am, there's more of a stigma associated with bisexuals than homosexuals, so you might not have as many admitting it out loud here as other places, i.e. online. See, when you're homosexual, there's some people you like, and some people you don't (Unless the person viewing the homosexual is homophobic). When you're bisexual, you're either a sex addict or you're a closet gay (pretending to be straight), and it's just easier saying you're straight or gay depending on who you're dating or going after at the time.
I am a straight male but I do realize that I am able to find a male attractive.
Now having said that just because I find someone attractive does not mean I automatically want to have sex with them.
Now having said that just because I find someone attractive does not mean I automatically want to have sex with them.
The biggest problem I have with this is that you don't really choose who you love, no matter whether you're heterosexual, homosexual, or bisexual. I couldn't be attracted to someone who isn't attractive to me if I willed myself to. That's just not how that works. If you're straight or gay you're still only attracted to certain people, even if those people are only of one gender. Saying bisexuals have a choice is almost like saying straight women like all men or gay men like all men, etc. This simply isn't the case.Aylaine said:I honestly can't relate to that. I have had people who were lesbian make remarks towards me for that though. Because I have 'choice' and thus apparently it's not real or as genuine. I've accepted that people are going to feel that way no matter what. Mostly because there are a lot of people out there who are lesbian/gay who feel it can't be a choice, that it's something you know all along or have known all along. I can't speak for the person before or after me, but I can speak for myself on how it worked for me.
For me, sexuality was and still is a choice. I didn't start off feeling this way about women, but I decided that I could feel the same way about women romantically, physically, sexually and mentally as I do men. That's what I chose to do, and now it's a natural part of who I am.
While it may be that way, many people will disagree with you, basically because of what I mentioned before. It could be possible though. By that theory though, would everyone 'progress' farther then what they are now?
you know, people who come out and say it are just boring.
The trick is to keep em guessing, like I do. You can't just come out and say it, you gotta throw clues around here, there, everythere.
That way they're unable to stereotype you, that way they're never sure.
That way they'll never you know you really like sheep...
The trick is to keep em guessing, like I do. You can't just come out and say it, you gotta throw clues around here, there, everythere.
That way they're unable to stereotype you, that way they're never sure.
That way they'll never you know you really like sheep...
Many would argue that you always were capable of these feelings for women, you just not acknowledged it.Aylaine said:For me, sexuality was and still is a choice. I didn't start off feeling this way about women, but I decided that I could feel the same way about women romantically, physically, sexually and mentally as I do men. That's what I chose to do, and now it's a natural part of who I am.
Exactly, it is incredibly complex, more so than humans would like to believe as it challenges their sense of self. When one looks at it, there is sexual attraction, romantic attraction, gender, sex, aesthetic attraction, hormones, the circumstances surrounding one's birth, genetics, and a whole heap load more to think about when it comes to the diversity of sexuality. It is definitely not a clear cut issue and needs to be discussed and explored if we are to come to terms with what it means to be for us.singlcuteguy said:
To get back to the original topic, most people are more comfortable coming out on the internet, I have no issues here talking about asexuality here as much in real life, as I do not have to watch and deal with the body language factor of people getting uncomfortable with the topic that is often found within real life conversations. I get to make my say here, as my words are not so easy to dismiss as "seeking attention" as the OP has suggested as a possibility for the increase in people coming out as bisexual.
As I and others have said repeatedly, sexuality is not a simplistic matter, people explore because they want to belong, they want to know they have a firm grasp on themselves if nothing else. If bisexuality is what works for comprehending themselves right now, it should not matter whether or not they are actually right or wrong, or how many of them might be of each. We should not confuse sexuality as a choice of course, but rather be open for people to explore and find a term that they feel best suits what they are, that they are comfortable with, not necessarily what they would like to be or hold up in ideal.
These topics on sexuality are important, and essential for us to learn about ourselves.
Just because you can get over someone doesn't mean that you have much choice in being attracted to them in the first place. Who can honestly say they haven't been attracted to someone or been in a relationship with someone who was a heartless jackass and known this but still had feelings for said heartless jackass? Yeah you can choose to keep the relationship (however unhealthy it may be) going, as much as a homosexual can keep a heterosexual relationship going, or vice-versa. Just because bisexual people have one less way for their relationship to be antithetical to themselves as people doesn't mean they have any more choice in who they are attracted to.Aylaine said:Let me ask you this: if we don't really choose who we love, how do we get over such people at all? Isn't that, to a degree, choice? It doesn't just happen over time, there is a degree of choice there in my opinion. I also believe this depends on the individual. I'm aware that certain feelings will develop and progress without a persons say so, but I also personally feel that one can alter or change how they feel if they have the control to do so.
That sounds basically the same to me. You decided to acknowledge it after meeting a special person that, for lack of a better phrase, 'unlocked it'. That could also be an explanation, one that I personally find much more likely. You say you made a conscious choice, and if you want to explain it that way, go ahead. I think you're wrong, though.Aylaine said:
Im in high school right now so i feel like 70% of the people who are "Bi" are just looking for attention 25% are actually struggling with there sexuality 5% are comfortable with with who they are and what they like, i respect the last one and I pity the second one, but i feel like punching the first one in the face when they make a big deal about the fact. The percentages probably aren't the case but that's the way i feel like the people that surround me work at this age.