I'm worried. Should I be?

[The Salty Vulcan]

Well, a few minutes ago my usual routine was kinda interrupted when my brother "stepped" through the door. Now my brother had a pretty big day today: After work, he and his workmates and best friends went to the bar and my brother, a little worse for wear to put it delicately, had a pretty good time considering. Now I helped him vomit and shower (not an experience I ever hope to revisit) and put him to bed. Now heres where this thread gains its relevance. As soon as my little brother got in bed, stark raving drunk and unable to walk staight, he broke down crying. When asked he simply replied "I hate my Life".

Allow me to paint a clearer picture of my brother: He's popular, in great shape, has three jobs which keep him afloat financially and is unanimously loved by all despite his many, many flaws. Now he has said that he has hated his Life before but as a joke, or so it seemed, to upset my parents (I dunno why, your asking me to explain the inner workings of a guy who thinks Pauley Shore is funny?) but the way he broke down tonight...well im starting to think it may be more than a joke. Even though I don't really like my brother*, I am worried. Though I'm not too sure if I should be. Any advice?

*I may not like the guy but he is still my brother and I'll always love him.

NOTE: I was able to talk him down and reassure him in case your wondering.

 

[Lexodus]

Well, yeah. In vino veritas, as they say. Just keep an eye out for him, maybe try to talk to him about it. Don't push it just yet, just let him know that you're here if he needs and that you do care.

 

[BlindMessiah94]

In my experience there is always some truth to the random verbage that comes from a person's mouth when they are drunk. He may not hate his life but he probably is unhappy about some aspect of it.

 

[Swaki]

well, everyone hates their life when they are that drunk, he may be stressed with 3 jobs, i was a walking nerve wreck when i had 2 jobs, only thing that kept me from walking around with a shotgun was 4-5 pots of espresso, but consider that it may just have been the booze talking.

 

[Amethyst Wind]

Well, yeah. In vino veritas, as they say. Just keep an eye out for him, maybe try to talk to him about it. Don't push it just yet, just let him know that you're here if he needs and that you do care.

"In wine there is truth"? Never heard that one before but there might very well be something there.

 

[Grouchy Imp_v1legacy]

There's a good chance it was the alcomahol talking. Incidentally, you never mentioned why your brother hates his life. Surely his reasons let you know whether he's being serious or just sodden?

 

[sqweesboo]

TBH, happy people don't generally get that drunk, I've found. Not when it comes down to it. They've got something in their life that they don't like and they use alcohol as a way to escape (no, before everyone gets their knickers in a twist, I'm not implying alcoholism), there was obviously a reason why he gave his liver a kicking.

 

[Wutaiflea]

I can be hard to understand why outwardly successful and popular people might be struggling with things, but they can be just as prone to depression and feelings of inadequacy as anyone else.

Its not unnatural to worry about a family member who seems upset, although it is worth remembering that alcohol is a depressant, and can make things seem a hell of a lot worse than they do normally.

You can't force your brother to make the situation clear to you, or to seek help if he needs it, but for your own peace of mind, it might be a good idea to take your brother aside and let him know you're worried about him. You can ask him if he feels okay after what happened, and that he sounded like he had something on his mind while you were taking care of him.

He may decide to talk, he may not, but knowing that you care, and that you're a safe person to talk to will do the world of good for both of you.

 

[Daedalus1942]

Well, a few minutes ago my usual routine was kinda interrupted when my brother "stepped" through the door. Now my brother had a pretty big day today: After work, he and his workmates and best friends went to the bar and my brother, a little worse for wear to put it delicately, had a pretty good time considering. Now I helped him vomit and shower (not an experience I ever hope to revisit) and put him to bed. Now heres where this thread gains its relevance. As soon as my little brother got in bed, stark raving drunk and unable to walk staight, he broke down crying. When asked he simply replied "I hate my Life".

Allow me to paint a clearer picture of my brother: He's popular, in great shape, has three jobs which keep him afloat financially and is unanimously loved by all despite his many, many flaws. Now he has said that he has hated his Life before but as a joke, or so it seemed, to upset my parents (I dunno why, your asking me to explain the inner workings of a guy who thinks Pauley Shore is funny?) but the way he broke down tonight...well im starting to think it may be more than a joke. Even though I don't really like my brother*, I am worried. Though I'm not too sure if I should be. Any advice?

*I may not like the guy but he is still my brother and I'll always love him.

NOTE: I was able to talk him down and reassure him in case your wondering.

I went through a similar period where i Went to a few parties, stayed up late, didn't bother looking after myself.
I went through a period of self-loathing, where I discovered much to my dismay I was transgendered...
Not saying your btoher's going through the same identity crisis I have had, but possibly he's got a big problem that's similar in scope and that could be why.
I could just be wrong.
-Tabitha<3-

 

[Monkfish Acc.]

I pretty much go on and on about how much I hate myself whenever I am drunk. I don't think it's really anything to worry about.
I mean, sure, being drunk means you say what you're really feeling, but I'm pretty sure just about everyone hates themselves or their lives deep down. This wouldn't be such a common occurance, otherwise.

Likely, he's just stressed the fuck out. As you said, he has three jobs. Most people have trouble keeping up one.
I'd say keep an eye on him, but don't make a huge fucking deal out of it. He's probably going to be embarrassed he said anything.

 

[infinity_turtles]

has three jobs which keep him afloat

I've known several people who start having some serious anxiety issues when they're over worked, to the point where they collapse and break down. There's also the fact that, chances are if he's working three jobs, I'd imagine he's not doing what he wants to with his life. If he has to work all three to stay afloat, then he probably doesn't think he can change that anymore.

 

[The Salty Vulcan]

I would just like to thank everyone for their kind words and support. The Escapist really is one of the best e-communities around.

Well, yeah. In vino veritas, as they say. Just keep an eye out for him, maybe try to talk to him about it. Don't push it just yet, just let him know that you're here if he needs and that you do care.

In my experience there is always some truth to the random verbage that comes from a person's mouth when they are drunk. He may not hate his life but he probably is unhappy about some aspect of it.

well, everyone hates their life when they are that drunk, he may be stressed with 3 jobs, i was a walking nerve wreck when i had 2 jobs, only thing that kept me from walking around with a shotgun was 4-5 pots of espresso, but consider that it may just have been the booze talking.

Yeah thats what I'm kinda worried about. He knows that I'll be there for him as much as I groan about it.

If a man says he does not have a problem you should probably not pry. You can tell if a man wants to talk, and if you feel he wants too talk then you should be worried about him. Well, don't really worry, just be there for him

Don't be afraid to be all
on his ass.

Thanks for the advice and for the music Ahlycks. That really helped me more than it did him. He's past out now.

There's a good chance it was the alcomahol talking. Incidentally, you never mentioned why your brother hates his life. Surely his reasons let you know whether he's being serious or just sodden?

I asked him and he was saying how he was'nt worth anything because he wasn't successful. Now at first I thought in various areas of life lke say relationships or happiness but he told me it was in a business sense. I know that this may sound cliche but I blame this part on my parents. They were never rally ones for pep talks.

TBH, happy people don't generally get that drunk, I've found. Not when it comes down to it. They've got something in their life that they don't like and they use alcohol as a way to escape (no, before everyone gets their knickers in a twist, I'm not implying alcoholism), there was obviously a reason why he gave his liver a kicking.

No not my brother. To be honest, neither t be honest we realy arent that heavy a pair of drinkers. I asked the guys who brought him home how much he had and they did explain that they were somewhat responsible. Hell, toppless waitress night with body shots I'd probably be in that state too. I do get what you mean though and I'll try as tactfully as I can to see whats on his mind.

I pretty much go on and on about how much I hate myself whenever I am drunk. I don't think it's really anything to worry about.
I mean, sure, being drunk means you say what you're really feeling, but I'm pretty sure just about everyone hates themselves or their lives deep down. This wouldn't be such a common occurance, otherwise.

Likely, he's just stressed the fuck out. As you said, he has three jobs. Most people have trouble keeping up one.
I'd say keep an eye on him, but don't make a huge fucking deal out of it He's probably going to be embarrassed he said anything.

Very true. Heck I've indulged ina trip to the icecream parlour when I'm a bit blue. I'm hoping that this is the case. Thanks for the advice though.

I can be hard to understand why outwardly successful and popular people might be struggling with things, but they can be just as prone to depression and feelings of inadequacy as anyone else.

Its not unnatural to worry about a family member who seems upset, although it is worth remembering that alcohol is a depressant, and can make things seem a hell of a lot worse than they do normally.

You can't force your brother to make the situation clear to you, or to seek help if he needs it, but for your own peace of mind, it might be a good idea to take your brother aside and let him know you're worried about him. You can ask him if he feels okay after what happened, and that he sounded like he had something on his mind while you were taking care of him.

He may decide to talk, he may not, but knowing that you care, and that you're a safe person to talk to will do the world of good for both of you.

Well, a few minutes ago my usual routine was kinda interrupted when my brother "stepped" through the door. Now my brother had a pretty big day today: After work, he and his workmates and best friends went to the bar and my brother, a little worse for wear to put it delicately, had a pretty good time considering. Now I helped him vomit and shower (not an experience I ever hope to revisit) and put him to bed. Now heres where this thread gains its relevance. As soon as my little brother got in bed, stark raving drunk and unable to walk staight, he broke down crying. When asked he simply replied "I hate my Life".

Allow me to paint a clearer picture of my brother: He's popular, in great shape, has three jobs which keep him afloat financially and is unanimously loved by all despite his many, many flaws. Now he has said that he has hated his Life before but as a joke, or so it seemed, to upset my parents (I dunno why, your asking me to explain the inner workings of a guy who thinks Pauley Shore is funny?) but the way he broke down tonight...well im starting to think it may be more than a joke. Even though I don't really like my brother*, I am worried. Though I'm not too sure if I should be. Any advice?

*I may not like the guy but he is still my brother and I'll always love him.

NOTE: I was able to talk him down and reassure him in case your wondering.

I went through a similar period where i Went to a few parties, stayed up late, didn't bother looking after myself.
I went through a period of self-loathing, where I discovered much to my dismay I was transgendered...
Not saying your btoher's going through the same identity crisis I have had, but possibly he's got a big problem that's similar in scope and that could be why.
I could just be wrong.
-Tabitha<3-

Thanks for the kind words and advice Ladies.

has three jobs which keep him afloat

I've known several people who start having some serious anxiety issues when they're over worked, to the point where they collapse and break down. There's also the fact that, chances are if he's working three jobs, I'd imagine he's not doing what he wants to with his life. If he has to work all three to stay afloat, then he probably doesn't think he can change that anymore.

Thats true. Even his outlet, Soccer is starting to feel like business aparently. Do you think it would be a good idea to talk him to quit one of them?

 

[Zykon TheLich]

3 jobs? Three jobs? THREE JOBS? Holy balls, 1 can be hard enough. I reckon that's his problem right there, or at least a large part of it.

 

[Grouchy Imp_v1legacy]

There's a good chance it was the alcomahol talking. Incidentally, you never mentioned why your brother hates his life. Surely his reasons let you know whether he's being serious or just sodden?

I asked him and he was saying how he was'nt worth anything because he wasn't successful. Now at first I thought in various areas of life lke say relationships or happiness but he told me it was in a business sense. I know that this may sound cliche but I blame this part on my parents. They were never rally ones for pep talks.

Well you did say your brother is currently holding down three jobs. I tried supplementing my full-time salary with a second part-time job not so long back, and the stress was a killer - and I had one less job than your brother. Could be he just needs some quality down-time, or a better paid job that allows him to fall back to fewer working hours.

 

[infinity_turtles]

has three jobs which keep him afloat

I've known several people who start having some serious anxiety issues when they're over worked, to the point where they collapse and break down. There's also the fact that, chances are if he's working three jobs, I'd imagine he's not doing what he wants to with his life. If he has to work all three to stay afloat, then he probably doesn't think he can change that anymore.

Thats true. Even his outlet, Soccer is starting to feel like business aparently. Do you think it would be a good idea to talk him to quit one of them?

I think people are too complicated for me to just give an answer on that. You should probably see what it is he'd like to do with his life, and then push him to pursue it if it's realistic. I'm not sure what his situation is exactly, but people who feel like they've already failed to do what they want, such as those who've dropped out of college or high school, even if they're still in their twenties(or even teens) and clearly have plenty of time to change things, often feel like they've missed their chance and that if they start now they'll always be lagging behind. They're not going to convince themselves to do the things they need to in order to get where they want to be, so they have to be pushed to do it.

 

[city cider]

Well, a few minutes ago my usual routine was kinda interrupted when my brother "stepped" through the door. Now my brother had a pretty big day today: After work, he and his workmates and best friends went to the bar and my brother, a little worse for wear to put it delicately, had a pretty good time considering. Now I helped him vomit and shower (not an experience I ever hope to revisit) and put him to bed. Now heres where this thread gains its relevance. As soon as my little brother got in bed, stark raving drunk and unable to walk staight, he broke down crying. When asked he simply replied "I hate my Life".

Allow me to paint a clearer picture of my brother: He's popular, in great shape, has three jobs which keep him afloat financially and is unanimously loved by all despite his many, many flaws. Now he has said that he has hated his Life before but as a joke, or so it seemed, to upset my parents (I dunno why, your asking me to explain the inner workings of a guy who thinks Pauley Shore is funny?) but the way he broke down tonight...well im starting to think it may be more than a joke. Even though I don't really like my brother*, I am worried. Though I'm not too sure if I should be. Any advice?

*I may not like the guy but he is still my brother and I'll always love him.

NOTE: I was able to talk him down and reassure him in case your wondering.

That's sad mate. But I wouldn't worry- I've seen some of the happiest people break down like that when they are so drunk, and then resoundingly assure me that it wasn't the case and it was the alcohol. This happened to my girlfriend. And yeah, I had to clean the vomit off her in the shower in the same night as well.

Don't worry man, trust me.

 

[CANofKAM]

Well, a few minutes ago my usual routine was kinda interrupted when my brother "stepped" through the door. Now my brother had a pretty big day today: After work, he and his workmates and best friends went to the bar and my brother, a little worse for wear to put it delicately, had a pretty good time considering. Now I helped him vomit and shower (not an experience I ever hope to revisit) and put him to bed. Now heres where this thread gains its relevance. As soon as my little brother got in bed, stark raving drunk and unable to walk staight, he broke down crying. When asked he simply replied "I hate my Life".

Allow me to paint a clearer picture of my brother: He's popular, in great shape, has three jobs which keep him afloat financially and is unanimously loved by all despite his many, many flaws. Now he has said that he has hated his Life before but as a joke, or so it seemed, to upset my parents (I dunno why, your asking me to explain the inner workings of a guy who thinks Pauley Shore is funny?) but the way he broke down tonight...well im starting to think it may be more than a joke. Even though I don't really like my brother*, I am worried. Though I'm not too sure if I should be. Any advice?

*I may not like the guy but he is still my brother and I'll always love him.

NOTE: I was able to talk him down and reassure him in case your wondering.

OK, for one thing, being flat-out drunk probably doesn't make him happy and to me it sounds like stress, 3 jobs? that can take a toll on anybody. My advice is just to 'LET GO'. if something or someone is bothering you, just let it go, don't worry, don't care, don't think, just let it go and wait for tomorrow.You should pass that advice onto him First you should diagnose the problem, it shouldn't be anything big but. just be there for him.

 

[bad_dog14]

Maybe it's just the drink talking (alcohol can make people do crazy shit, like throwing a blanket over a balcony for no reason), but you should still try to talk to him, and if things get worse get him to a therapist.

 

[katsumoto03]

He's probably stressed man. He's got a lot on his plate. You shouldn't worry, per say, but keep an eye out for him.

(I'm pretty much the worst person to be giving this advice...)