is this actually racist?

[Dr. Crawver]

Actually it is slightly racist.

Thing is, when you say you aren't attracted to a race it means you assume all people of that race will be unattractive to you, including the ones you haven't met.

If she had said something like "I've never met an Asian who I was attracted to" then sure, there's nothing wrong with that. Maybe her Asian friends all have characteristics that she isn't looking for in a partner and that is fine!

But the way you described it it sounds like she thinks all Asians have something about them that makes them unattractive to her, when in reality not all Asians could possibly share that trait because of how varied every race is. It just isn't OBVIOUSLY racist because she isn't saying WHAT that unattractive trait is.

It is only a few steps away from saying "I'm not attracted to black people because they are too tall", or "I'm not attracted to white people because they are too short".

yes that was why I was thinking it was ambiguous. I kind of failed to be able to put it down in words myself

that, no
your diplay pic,
probably

yes, someone else already pointed it out. I'm black myself, so I'm certainly not using it to hurt others, I just found it amusing

 

[Dr. Crawver]

me and my girlfriend are pretty serious in our relationship, but are also pretty open-minded and discuss quite a bit about hypotheticals. Anyway, I forget why, but I essentially asked her at one point about her opinions on Asians physically, and she said that she has no physical attraction to them. She does have a few Asian friends, both male and female, and as far as I have seen she doesn't treat them any different to her other friends, so escapist, would you say that this is racist?

The funny thing about this is that a few days ago at my university a black woman got up in the middle of the university (they had some sort of open mic thing for some reason) and said that "If you don't like me because I'm black, honey brown, Autumn, Auburn, (etc) and because I have big lips, big breasts, big butts and large thighs, if you're not attracted to me because of these features as a African American woman, you are racist. You are sexist. Don't try to tell me otherwise, you are inherently preventing my progress by putting me in an inferior place."

I don't particularly like most African features... but that doesn't mean I don't like them at all? I also don't really like Slavs and eastern Europeans, but I've dated some. I'm not racist at all by having certain personal preferences! It's not about being "black", and I suppose the only thing that's "racist" about it is that you're stereotyping a people... but as long as you don't let that prevent you from appreciating an otherwise attractive person, it's not wrong!

that seems...unusual. She seems to be mixing sexism and racism into one, as well as saying because of a lack of attraction she's being held back by people. Unusual point to make

not only that, but for her to stereotype black people like that (if you look at MOST traditonal Africans, few of them actually look like that - it's only a specific region of africa that has some of those features... to say nothing of the physical diversity in America) it is in and of itself racist.

Without getting into too deep of a discussion, I am a BIG believer in the idea that most minority populations (indeed, most disadvantaged populations) are more often then not hurt by themselves rather than discrimination. Perhaps its not because of their own actions, but to say it's some big, evil white guy/corporation/corrupt government/some other entity out to get you because you're a nobody is typically false... or at the very least, HORRIFICALLY exaggerated.

...All I can say is I'm glad I'm a brit, we don't have (many) people like that

 

[JamesStone]

Not at all. It´s not racist to not be attracted to certains characteristics. Some woman prefer black guys, others white guys. Tall, blond, redhaired, etc., you get the point.
Not being into some characteristcs in a person isn´t the same as being racist. It´s just being human.

 

[SckizoBoy]

snip

Mmmmmm... technically, it is but only to such an extent as to be negligible.

However, I think this would be pertinent:

Spoiler: Everybodys a Little Bit Racist

Despite being Chinese, I'm just not attracted to Chinese girls. Does that make me racist? *shrug*

 

[Ti0k0]

No, it's not racist, or do babies feel discriminated too, because I am NOT sexually attracted to them?

 

[MammothBlade]

Hmm, I like how every conversation about race depends on whether it's "racist" or not. Let's ask another question in place of "is this racist?"

Is this bad? Is your girlfriend compelled to ignore race as a factor in sexual attraction? Nope. Is this racism, under the definition of "discrimination against a person because of their race?" Yes, she's passively discriminating on those grounds. But that does not make it a hate crime in the slightest. We have a tendency to doublethink, because it has been so deeply ingrained into our thought patterns that anything possibly racist cannot be acceptable. It's time to wise up to a truth which some may find it hard to swallow. Yes, this sort of thing is racist, but it's ok. Most people do it, and all we do is deny it.