It is NOT the zombie apocalypse...

[Squilookle]

You've got your tinned food and bomb shelter all stocked up,
your shotgun and your axe ready to go,
your escape routes and health packs on standby.

But wouldn't you know it? Just like on every other day, it's not the zombie apocalypse today. Instead it's warm and sunny, and you admit you're forced to go outside and get a life for once.

What do you do first?

 

[Jedoro]

I play the waiting game, because obviously I slept through the apocalypse and the zombies are trying to lull me into a false sense of security.

 

[thepyrethatburns]

Depends. Am I wearing pants or not?

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

What do I do? I go back to the internet and post about it, probably blaming someone for convincing me it was really happening. Then I go into forum games, never to emerge again...

 

[werty10089]

Just accept the zombies. Integrate into their society, mate with their women. Eventually our differences will subside.

 

[Squilookle]

Depends. Am I wearing pants or not?

Entirely up to you.

 

[NeutralDrow]

Picnic with the tinned food.

 

[Squilookle]

Picnic with the tinned food.

What, and risk losing your rations? Wouldn't you want to hold on to them?

 

[TheYellowCellPhone]

I'd just leave everything where it was, then go on the Internet and watch videos on YouTube.

 

[MordinSolus]

Depends. Am I wearing pants or not?

No! No pants for you!

 

[SonOfVoorhees]

I go back to bed.....wake me up when their is a zombie holocaust.

 

[Argtee]

Pffft! Go outside? Who do you think I am?
*sits back down at computer*

 

[SD-Fiend]

see if werewolves are available if not i'll try vampires but not the twilight kind. if I can't find either then i'll try an eldritch abomination or alien attack but those can get pretty pricey but mummy's are cheap if you don't go for a pharaoh or anything.

 

[Son of a Mitch]

See a doctor. I'd be going bat-shit crazy if I got to the point that I prepared for it before anything had happened.

But if I were already that insane, I'd probably think that the medicine the doctors gave me would turn me into a zombie, so that would be fun...

 

[Quaxar]

Party in my bomb shelter!

We'll eat the best canned beans you could get and play shotgun the pinata!

 

[NeutralDrow]

Picnic with the tinned food.

What, and risk losing your rations? Wouldn't you want to hold on to them?

I'd only stockpile them at other peoples' recommendation. In case of zombie apocalypse, either I'm totally safe with just the barricades, or I'm doomed because the zombies are magical and don't behave like corpses (rotting and getting re-killed by everything and everyone) and better off preemptively flinging myself off a cliff.

 

[moosek]

I'm gonna get mad drunk, and make out with a woman I don't know. 1/5 chance she'll be into me.

I did see a dude get sick at the bus stop yesterday. He literally turned green, and was stumbling everywhere. It might have been vertigo, but damn, I thought he was about to zombie out. I had my leg ready to kick some face.

 

[Miles000]

Keep training...
Patience is key.

One day I will be right. Then they will see... THEY WILL ALL SEE!
I WAS RIGHT! I'M NOT CRAZY!!!

Mwahahahahahahaha!

Then get drunk again...

 

[Shoggoth2588]

I play the waiting game, because obviously I slept through the apocalypse and the zombies are trying to lull me into a false sense of security.

This exactly: Every zombie movie and game starts out like that. It's all sunny and nice, there's not a person in sight, all is still and quiet and nice. As soon as you find that first zombie though, it's game over and you find zombies coming from FREAKING EVERYWHERE!

If it isn't the zombie apocalypse though, I'd still stay inside to play some video games. I have some SNES and N64 games to catch up on.