Just Nut Up And Do It

[Hookman]

That way if you knock one up/get knocked up by one you can look forward to being the parent of a bubbly short lived whore.

Oh Emiscary, you and your casual suggested incest!... Hell, I'd still hit it.

OT: Honestly, if we're gonna discuss impractical armour then we could be here till doomsday!
Fact is its not going to change any time soon so why don't we just kick back, stick on some smooth jazz, and enjoy the view?

What, too creepy?
Alright, then I suggest an equaliser. How about giving the male characters costumes that are just as skimpy?! Yes, lets just imagine that for a second while I put on some smooth jazz.

 

[Kungfu_Teddybear]

oh my god....

is that promo imagine real?...sweet jesus

That's not even the worst or most "in your face" of it.


This is armor. ARMOR!

yeah..no concern for safty..why dont they just have her naked and....and...

is that high heels? IS SHE WEARING FUCKING HIGH HEELS!!!!!!!??? NO! NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Every female in the game, regardless of the type of outfit, be it cloth, plate or leather, wears high heels...

...yeah.

 

[Agayek]

That's not even the worst or most "in your face" of it.

This is armor. ARMOR!

Unless I very much miss my guess, that's heavy armor on top of that.

 

[jehk]

Every female in the game, regardless of the type of outfit, be it cloth, plate or leather, wears high heels...

...yeah.

I know. It's so unfair. I want my big burly berserker to wear high heels.

 

[BloatedGuppy]

That's not even the worst or most "in your face" of it.

This is armor. ARMOR!

Unless I very much miss my guess, that's heavy armor on top of that.

What happens when she raises her arm? Doesn't the shoulder piece just shove her head sideways?

I'll never understand these enormous pauldrons. Some of the ones in WoW had lava pooled in them, or arcing lighting. Presumably so if you ever need to raise your arm you instantly die.

 

[RJ 17]

That's not even the worst or most "in your face" of it.

This is armor. ARMOR!

Unless I very much miss my guess, that's heavy armor on top of that.

What happens when she raises her arm? Doesn't the shoulder piece just shove her head sideways?

I'll never understand these enormous pauldrons. Some of the ones in WoW had lava pooled in them, or arcing lighting. Presumably so if you ever need to raise your arm you instantly die.

Pfffft, you're forgetting the magic of a fantasy universe allows for any inconveniently placed/designed armor to be in a state of constant flux: phasing out of existence should it be moved in such a way as to penetrate the wearer and resolidifying once it's free of obstructions.

 

[BloatedGuppy]

Pfffft, you're forgetting the magic of a fantasy universe allows for any inconveniently placed/designed armor to be in a state of constant flux: phasing out of existence should it be moved in such a way as to penetrate the wearer and resolidifying once it's free of obstructions.

Well, at least her shoulders and knees are covered. There'll be no Skyrim level mishaps here.

 

[RJ 17]

Pfffft, you're forgetting the magic of a fantasy universe allows for any inconveniently placed/designed armor to be in a state of constant flux: phasing out of existence should it be moved in such a way as to penetrate the wearer and resolidifying once it's free of obstructions.

Well, at least her shoulders and knees are covered. There'll be no Skyrim level mishaps here.

"I used to be an elven porn star...then I took an arrow to the knee..."

 

[Agayek]

What happens when she raises her arm? Doesn't the shoulder piece just shove her head sideways?

I always assumed it was a variation on hammerspace. If she moves enough for the pauldron to conk her in the head, the portion that would have hit her gets swallowed into a pocket dimension until the rest of it moves away.

You know, thinking about it some more, that could well be why they wear armor like that. It provides protection by virtue of automatically consuming incoming attacks into a pocket dimension so it can't actually hit them.

I HAVE SOLVED ANIME PHYSICS!

I'll never understand these enormous pauldrons. Some of the ones in WoW had lava pooled in them, or arcing lighting. Presumably so if you ever need to raise your arm you instantly die.

The reason they had lava and lightning and shit on pauldrons in WoW is the same reason pauldrons are used in 40k. The bigger/flashier your pauldrons, the more important you are. You can find a decent breakdown of the concept here: http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Pauldrons

 

[Burst6]

The thing that i hate most is the animation. I don't mind the clothes as much (why does so little armor protect anything at all? MAGIC!) but the animations...

Does the mage HAVE to belly dance when they cast magics? Oh god..

 

[veloper]

I agree with the OP.

Either make a game clean or make pornography a big part of a game.
None of this suggestive crap without the actual content. It's false advertising. The whole thing is an unnecessary embarrasment now.

 

[RJ 17]

The thing that i hate most is the animation. I don't mind the clothes as much (why does so little armor protect anything at all? MAGIC!) but the animations...

Does the mage HAVE to belly dance when they cast magics? Oh god..

Yes. Yes they most specifically do.

 

[SEXTON HALE]

No pole too intimidating?
That sounds like a challenge!
I accept good sir name a time and a place.
I will be there.

 

[Burst6]

The thing that i hate most is the animation. I don't mind the clothes as much (why does so little armor protect anything at all? MAGIC!) but the animations...

Does the mage HAVE to belly dance when they cast magics? Oh god..

Yes. Yes they most specifically do.

Maybe it's a defense thing. If an enemy comes close while you're casting you use a princess peach style butt slam to knock them back. Keep those hips gyrating to save momentum.

But then what do the males get? hyper pelvic thrusts?

 

[DeltaEdge]

The best you can really do in these kinds of situations is to not play and/or spend money on these games. Show them with your wallets that you think what their doing is not the way to make a good game. Also be sure to convince your friends not to buy their games and maybe even send a letter to the creators alerting them of their folly. If companies think only about how to get the most money, than just take away as much money as possible, and hold their hands while explaining exactly why their cash-grabbing attempt is bad, and then tell them how they actually should go about robbing us of our cash. Of course, many companies don't actually listen to giant walking-talking wallets, so talking might not always work.

 

[Nerexor]

The thing that i hate most is the animation. I don't mind the clothes as much (why does so little armor protect anything at all? MAGIC!) but the animations...

Does the mage HAVE to belly dance when they cast magics? Oh god..

Yes. Yes they most specifically do.

Maybe it's a defense thing. If an enemy comes close while you're casting you use a princess peach style butt slam to knock them back. Keep those hips gyrating to save momentum.

But then what do the males get? hyper pelvic thrusts?

Heh, that would be an interesting attack animation. Maybe do it anime style, have the guy slowly lean back while yelling "Hyyyyyyper Pelllllllllvic" and then "THRUUUUUUUUUST!"

 

[Burst6]

The thing that i hate most is the animation. I don't mind the clothes as much (why does so little armor protect anything at all? MAGIC!) but the animations...

Does the mage HAVE to belly dance when they cast magics? Oh god..

Yes. Yes they most specifically do.

Maybe it's a defense thing. If an enemy comes close while you're casting you use a princess peach style butt slam to knock them back. Keep those hips gyrating to save momentum.

But then what do the males get? hyper pelvic thrusts?

Heh, that would be an interesting attack animation. Maybe do it anime style, have the guy slowly lean back while yelling "Hyyyyyyper Pelllllllllvic" and then "THRUUUUUUUUUST!"

If you get a special upgrade it fires a white projectile that stops the enemy from moving.



.. too much?

 

[Kanatatsu]

I like tits. And super skimpy armor. I buy a lot of video games.

There is probably a connection here I am missing, but I bet the developers get it.

 

[Jonatron]

This is armor. ARMOR!

Nothing new really.
See: Forsworn female armor in Skyrim, and female Raider armor in Fallout 3/NV.

Slightly makes sense for those two examples since Forsworn and Raiders are crazy, animal drug addicts who do little else than rut and kill each other, with little in the way of self preservation. Strange that Forsworn and Raider Armour is statistically similar to full leather equivalents. Hell, Forsworn armour has really high stats. (Or my light armor skill was too jacked up). It's jarring when characters who are supposed to be intelligent are portrayed in useless armour that exposes all their vital organs.