Therumancer said:
To put things into perspective, there have been numerous attempts to do the whole "Modern Romantic Vampire" thing with video games. The two "Vampire The Masquerade" games were pretty personally I like the idea of:
1. a bioshock style FPS where you accidentally get the plane to Forks and get escorted through by Jasper Cullen as you evade the hordes of hormonally maddened teenage girls to confront Edward.
2. a call of cthulhu style adventure where you have to defeat the vampires but don't look at them!
3. a cross-franchise vampire smash bros. with Alucard, Edward, Spike et al.
Snipped my own quoting.
I don't think a parody or satire is what they are going for.
However I personally thought of a game where you get to play an emergency driver in town whose job it is to get Bella to the hospital every time something happens. You know how like in the movie there is that one much-mocked scene where she almost got hit by a car (but didn't) and they rushed her to the hospital and gave her a private room?
Given that everyone loves Bella, you could get dispatches like "OMG, Bella spilled her coffee she didn't burn herself, but almost did" at which point you have to get your ambulance out, turn on the lights, and go speeding through town without a care for collateral damage as you run over pedestians and cause 40 car pileups... which nobody cares about because IT'S BELLA!.
At higher difficulty levels you might have to rush Edward's stalker sense. He wants to lurk creepily in the closet of her hospital room (or in the hallway or whatever) but it's awkward if he gets there before you do, so you wind up having to get there, and get Bella to the hospital before Edward so they can make the scene properly....
Okay, okay I put a ridiculous amount of thought into that. Still it's every bit as good as some of those Disney/Pixar adaptions. Hmmm, maybe some game designer will read this and offer me money to use my idea....