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[staika]

*uncle tusky gets into battle position*

Spoiler: Uncle tusky uses hair flip!

 

[Link_to_Future]

*Carpenter flinches*

Hey, no fair!

*steals toupee from Uncle Tusky*

 

[staika]

*toupee explodes*

Uncle tusky you shouldn't put C4 in your hair.

 

[Link_to_Future]

*lies sizzling on the ground*

Well played...*cough*...but I'll get you next time...*cough cough*...

*throws firecrackers at Uncle Tusky and vanishes*

 

[staika]

*uncle tusky explodes*


UNCLE TUSKY! NNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

 

[Link_to_Future]

*appears*

Oh, don't worry. I've got one better. Meet...

UNCLE MUSKY!

*hands staika an irritated skunk and disappears*

 

[staika]

*takes plastic bag and places skunk in the bag*

now what can we do with it........ I know!

*buries the skunk in the garden*

 

[Link_to_Future]

*the entire garden becomes choked by skunk weed*

Oh...wow. This is pretty illegal.

*calls the DEA*

 

[staika]

This is a problem that I know how to fix
*frames his illegal immigrant neighbor*

 

[Link_to_Future]

o.o

You're...surprisingly good at worming your way out of trouble.

Hmm...

*hides body in staika's attic and hides murder weapon on staika's body*

 

[staika]

*watches link in amazement*

Umm...... That's not my house and that was the chief of police... Just so you know >.>

*hides sign he used to make it seem like it was his house*

 

[Link_to_Future]

Oh well, he still needed taking care of. I don't really care who takes the fall for it.

Speaking of fall...

*buries staika under a mountain of golden leaves*

 

[staika]

*presses the button on the inside of his jacket*

*uncle tusky appears and digs him out*

Thanks uncle tusky, but I thought you....
*uncle tusky explodes*
Well that's what I was about to ask....

 

[Link_to_Future]

It seems as though you are being haunted by exploding ghosts. You would be surprised how common of a problem that is. There is no need for you to be ashamed. All you need to do is TAKE ACTION!

I will remove your ghost problem for a modest fee. And it totally won't involve the destruction of everything you have ever owned or everyone you've ever loved. Trust me.

 

[staika]

Well that would be very helpful, how much.......
*uncle tusky appears next to him*
Uncle tusky?
*listens to uncle tusky*

Uncle tusky says you're the enemy and that enemies have to be killed in horrible ways.

 

[Link_to_Future]

You're honestly going to believe a walrus over my word? Honestly, what is this world coming to?

When have I ever steered you wrong in the past?

*wide grin*

 

[staika]

He has a point uncle tusky....
*uncle tusky slaps him*
I'll behave uncle tusky...

Uncle tusky says that you cannot persuade me because I belong to uncle tusky....

 

[Link_to_Future]

Can't you see? He's no good. He abuses you, makes you think what he thinks. It's an unhealthy relationship.

You just need to break away. Get a fresh start.

You know what? Just for you, I will take care of your "problem" for half price. Consider it a favor among friends. ^_^

 

[staika]

*uncle tusky starts to yell at link in walrus language*
Uncle tusky says to shut your mouth, he knows what's best for me.

 

[Link_to_Future]

Ooh...it's a lot worse than I thought.

Alright staika, I'll give you this one for free since you need it. Just say the word and you'll be free.