Laws you'd make

[The .50 Caliber Cow]

1st Degree murder = You live on the moon.

If it is proven you committed murder in the first degree, you will live the rest of your life on a prison on the moon. Not a lot to do on the moon and escape = death anyway so you'd spent the rest of your life looking at the planet you once lived on.

 

[Psycho Cat Industries]

I'd hire a personal group and make their job solely to slap stupid people across the nation.
If they think you did something stupid, they can slap you.

Also, Bacon is now the new national food, and must be consumed at least once a week. No exceptions.

Yay!Now Peta can have a reason to exist.

OP:I would make it a law that any to whom I deem annoying is to be kicked by my guards and that games are now legally considered art.Also,I would make a law stating that anyone who screws up the economy worse then it is get shot repeatedly by ball barring rifles until death!
Finally,January second and December third shall be known as stepping day,a international holiday to give me gifts (optional) and take a day off (not optional)

 

[Miles000]

Ok found those crazy iTunes terms for anyone who is interested.

Spoiler: For the apps store

You also agree that you will not use these products for any purposes prohibited by United States law, including, without limitation, the development, design, manufacture or production of nuclear, missiles, or chemical or biological weapons.

and

Spoiler: For iTunes

THE APPLE SOFTWARE IS NOT INTENDED FOR USE IN THE OPERATION OF NUCLEAR FACILITIES, AIRCRAFT NAVIGATION OR COMMUNICATION SYSTEMS, AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL SYSTEMS, LIFE SUPPORT MACHINES OR OTHER EQUIPMENT IN WHICH THE FAILURE OF THE APPLE SOFTWARE COULD LEAD TO DEATH, PERSONAL INJURY, OR SEVERE PHYSICAL OR ENVIRONMENTAL DAMAGE.

Enjoy

 

[Ghengis John]

OK.
See now while I agree with those new ones, I'd also like to point out that its starting to look like a EULA itself.

Ah, sadly this is what happens when you stare into the abyss.

 

[Singularly Datarific]

Ok found those crazy iTunes terms for anyone who is interested.

Spoiler: For the apps store

You also agree that you will not use these products for any purposes prohibited by United States law, including, without limitation, the development, design, manufacture or production of nuclear, missiles, or chemical or biological weapons.

and

Spoiler: For iTunes

THE APPLE SOFTWARE IS NOT INTENDED FOR USE IN THE OPERATION OF NUCLEAR FACILITIES, AIRCRAFT NAVIGATION OR COMMUNICATION SYSTEMS, AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL SYSTEMS, LIFE SUPPORT MACHINES OR OTHER EQUIPMENT IN WHICH THE FAILURE OF THE APPLE SOFTWARE COULD LEAD TO DEATH, PERSONAL INJURY, OR SEVERE PHYSICAL OR ENVIRONMENTAL DAMAGE.

Enjoy

Put his EKG on the Visualizer!

 

[Lawllerskater]

Anyone who partakes in graffiti vandalism acts and are caught will have their index fingers cut off. This way they cannot use graffiti cans anymore.

 

[Psycho Cat Industries]

Ok found those crazy iTunes terms for anyone who is interested.

Spoiler: For the apps store

You also agree that you will not use these products for any purposes prohibited by United States law, including, without limitation, the development, design, manufacture or production of nuclear, missiles, or chemical or biological weapons.

and

Spoiler: For iTunes

THE APPLE SOFTWARE IS NOT INTENDED FOR USE IN THE OPERATION OF NUCLEAR FACILITIES, AIRCRAFT NAVIGATION OR COMMUNICATION SYSTEMS, AIR TRAFFIC CONTROL SYSTEMS, LIFE SUPPORT MACHINES OR OTHER EQUIPMENT IN WHICH THE FAILURE OF THE APPLE SOFTWARE COULD LEAD TO DEATH, PERSONAL INJURY, OR SEVERE PHYSICAL OR ENVIRONMENTAL DAMAGE.

Enjoy

So Fallout becomes a reality because someone was listening to REM off their I pod while monitoring nukes?I get the 50's fashion because that is just awesome but really?I gotta say,that is a really weird do not try to say the least.

 

[emeraldrafael]

People must walk on the sidewalk/hallways/paths/etc in the same manner the roads of said area work. ALso, no more then two people per side.


Its so bothersome trying to fight your way through a crowd of six plus people who take up an entire Hallway just so that they can all talk, and then give you a dirty look because you feel you should be able to walk down the same path in the opposite direction.

 

[TheTurtleMan]

Enable a law to make the sale of alcohol and nicotine products to be more strict and handeled by the government. This along with fortification of border patrol along Mexico would be the only major laws I can think of right now. No offense to the chain smoking alcoholic illegal immigrants out there, it's just business.

Actually come to think of it, I would also like the national animal to be changed to a bear with chainsaws with arms. Or a platypus, either one really.

 

[Candidus]

Home Invasion: The moment you cross the threshold from 'the public space' into the private space of another citizen without their knowledge or permission... every protection normally afforded to you under the law is suspended until such a time as you enter police custody. If you are killed in the process of trespass and burglary, more's the pity. Belongings that are in your name alone will be seized by the state and auctioned off; a part of the sum raised will be earmarked for the victim(s) of your crime (the one who may well have killed you).

Obviously, this is just one law, but obviously I'd like it if all criminal law read like the above.

 

[Paksenarrion]

The 2/3 majority vote is to determine if the filibuster was entertaining or not. If it's not entertaining, the congresspersons who participated in the filibuster void their votes regarding the bill they're filibustering. Basically, the people whose time you're wasting better be entertained, or your filibuster would have come to naught.

Only it wouldn't work like that and the IDEA IS you waste everyone's time. If you have a 2/3 majority vote you have a passed bill. With all the money on the line and favors to return there is no way a faction with a majority vote is going to sit there and vote to allow a man to spray whipped cream on his head. He could be the world's greatest entertainer and they'd boot him off the stage to move along with their business. Filibusters are an act of desperation when your position is badly outnumbered. The very mechanics of when you employ them simply make your idea a bad one. The opposition, if allowed to vote on whether you can oppose them, would always vote no.

I think I'm misunderstanding the term filibuster.

Please correct me if I'm wrong. A filibuster is when a bill needs a 2/3 majority vote to pass, and the holdouts who don't want it to pass make long speeches in order to delay the majority vote?

 

[tobi the good boy]

Anyone who purchases a Call of Duty game from this point on is to be packaged and shipped to an undisclosed location never to be heard of again.

 

[Singularly Datarific]

Any and all suing attempts must first pass a "Common Sense Jury",

legalize common sense. I know it sounds weird but it seems people are fearful of it these days. My cousin is being charged for being hit by a car whose driver had only one eye. It was her right to cross the intersection but because she rode her bike threw it, she was charged.

So this doesn't happen.

Also- illegalize political parties. We cannot be a decent country if everyone is busy yelling at each other over how it should be run (isn't that the whole point of this 'state' system?).

 

[Ghengis John]

I think I'm misunderstanding the term filibuster.

Please correct me if I'm wrong. A filibuster is when a bill needs a 2/3 majority vote to pass, and the holdouts who don't want it to pass make long speeches in order to delay the majority vote?

No that's it exactly. The problem is I'm taking it too seriously. It was a funny idea.

 

[Infernai]

1. Legalize an R rating for video games.
2. Replace lawsuits (Except for serious cases such as sexual harrassment, compensation and assault etc) with gladiatorial fights to the death between the two parties involved. Why? Because It would stop people from suing one another over completely idiotic things.
3. Legalize airsoft and BB weapons

 

[gunrunnerjr]

ban abortion

make gay marriage illegal

pull all U.S. troops back to the USA no more fighting needless wars

insted of a president have a council of 50(1 from each state)

stop taxing the hell out of the lower and middle class

and shut down the T.S.A.

abolish the federal reserve (who the fuck are they to spend billions of taxpayer money on bailouts for banks in europe?????)

ok go ahead internets rant and pout away

 

[iblis666]

a companies highest wage employee or ceo cant be payed any more than 40 times that of the lowest wage worker employed directly or indirectly(outsourced) by a company

1. ban abortion

2. make gay marriage illegal

3. pull all U.S. troops back to the USA no more fighting needless wars

4. insted of a president have a council of 50(1 from each state)

5. stop taxing the hell out of the lower and middle class

6. and shut down the T.S.A.

7. abolish the federal reserve (who the fuck are they to spend billions of taxpayer money on bailouts for banks in europe?????)

ok go ahead internets rant and pout away

1. dont really agree with for several reason but the main one that effects me is that abortions have been proven to reduce the crime rate

2. i couldnt care less about gays but it doesnt effect me so if they want to marry then fine what ever

3. agreed

4. segregating states like that is a bad idea hell i dont even like the senate id say a better idea would be a system of 50 but its picked based on the amount of people for each party. this would also let parties diversify instead of just being 2 opposing powers that dont have anyone's best interest in mind.

5. taxes are necessary but i do have to agree that the lower and middle classes need a tax break but also the upper class needs to be taxed severely and a ton of cash needs to be confiscated from those that have been ripping the government off

6. tsa is crap and if i had my way id remove it

7. the problem isnt the federal reserve which we need in some form but the people who run the federal reserve most of which are just there to line their pockets need to be removed

 

[tkioz]

Abolish "white collar" laws and instead have fraud jail terms based on harm done.
For example if you knowingly bring down a bank and put millions of people out of work to pad your own bank account you get the same sentence as the murderer who only ruined a few lives (victim + family).

 

[punksnotdead]

3. No Child Left Behind would be immediately abolished (because I do live in America, and I hate this thing with a burning passion of a thousand summer suns).

Yeah man, you know that it gave the military the right to steal personal information from school kids.