London to get coffee and Blowjob cafe

[lacktheknack]

but is there some sort of system in place to prevent the spread of STIs?

Dental dams. Dental dams absolutely everywhere.

 

[DefunctTheory]

Spoiler

So is this service only for men?

Yup.

They were asked about doing it for women, and they said their not currently setting up for it. Once the business is in action (Presumably proving that a. they can make money and b. their lawyers know their stuff and they aren't going to get pounded into paste by the government), they said they'd look into whether it's worth doing it for women (If enough women show interest).

Ah, well that makes sort of sense I guess. Though it sounds a little more of a spatial issue to deal with there also.

Yup. There's only so many orientation you can reasonable cater too with only a 150 square meters to use.

They're also talking about maybe franchising it if it goes well (Oh yah, they're going to go all McDonalds on this crap), so maybe they'll make entire new places for gay/lesbian/female services. It would suck for people who want to go out with their differently-oriented friends, but hey, they do it with strip clubs, why not this?

 

[mad825]

but is there some sort of system in place to prevent the spread of STIs?

Dental dams. Dental dams absolutely everywhere.

Or you know, you can just use a condom. It never suggested OWO.

 

[Cowabungaa]

Yah... trying to hold a conversation with a friend (They say they picked a coffee place because it's social, so you're supposed to bring a friend) and drink coffee and have a pastry while some woman slobs your knob in public under the table...

All I can think of are caricature mob bosses and record business executives, which if Vinyl (great show) is to be believed are almost the same thing. So basically they made a new gathering place for the disconcerting organized criminal. At least we know where they are now.

 

[RaikuFA]

So I guess they'll be serving fappachinos?

 

[KissingSunlight]

Idiocracy is here! That was one prediction in the movie. Prostitution will be available at Starbucks.

 

[DefunctTheory]

Idiocracy is here! That was one prediction in the movie. Prostitution will be available at Starbucks. I'll edit in the video clip if I can find it.

Spoiler: You did it while I was typing my post, whoops

You can use start=seconds end=seconds to narrow the video down, by the way.

So I guess they'll be serving fappachinos?

We need to get Caramel Frappe in here.

 

[Paragon Fury]

Spoiler

... Ew.

I mean, whatever floats your boat, I suppose. But... ew. That sounds super unsexy to me.

Yah... trying to hold a conversation with a friend (They say they picked a coffee place because it's social, so you're supposed to bring a friend) and drink coffee and have a pastry while some woman slobs your knob in public under the table... I'm sure that's someones fetish, but it just sounds like an expensive way to have an awkward moment with both acquaintances and strangers. And a good way to see some facial expressions on a good friends face that you probably could have gone a life time without seeing.

Our laws are a bit weirder over here regarding sex work, so I suppose it depends if the law decides whether or not it's technically a brothel. I do wonder if this would be more profitable for the women themselves, though. I suppose they wouldn't have to go looking for customers, but also they're only getting a bit of the 50quid pricetag, rather than all of it.

The article seems to imply that there will be a lot of hookers to choose from, but only 150 square meters of space to put table in (Tables which will have to be supersized to accommodate women, of course). Doesn't sound very ideal for the prostitutes, to be honest.

Hey now, if you just want a awkward time in public for cheap, just bring me along! I can do awkward silences, awkward moments of not knowing what to say or respond, clumsiness AND unintentionally awkward conversations. All for the low price of some snacks!

But will you occasional moan creepily like someones licking your coin purse and show me your O-Face in the middle of a sentence? That's where your money's going in these fellatio cafes.

No, I don't have any experience with that. But I will likely get extremely embarrassed and become unable to form coherent sentences or even words and then have performance anxiety meaning when the hostess arrives to do the deed she'll inevitably laugh at me making the situation even worse.

Idiocracy is here! That was one prediction in the movie. Prostitution will be available at Starbucks. I'll edit in the video clip if I can find it.

So I guess they'll be serving fappachinos?

We need to get Caramel Frappe in here.

Caramel Fappe*.

 

[Fappy]

So I guess they'll be serving fappachinos?

Someone's cutting into my business...

 

[Fiz_The_Toaster]

Well, that's weird and not something that I'm into.

But hey, whatever floats your boat.

I suppose some people just like extra whip.

 

[Erttheking]

....If you want to get blown in a room filled with people and/or want to drink coffee in a place where someone is getting sucked off two tables over, then more power to you...I just don't see the appeal.

 

[Zykon TheLich_v1legacy]

Like I said, I'd hope the UK would have similar laws. Then again, since brothels are illegal, I don't even know if registering as a prostitute is thing in the country. So even if they do have those laws, how could they enforce them?

Nope, we don't. If 2 people want to come to a private agreement in which sexual favours are exchanged for whatever, it's none of the law's business, but you can't solicit, run a brothel or live off immoral earnings (pimping). Otherwise there's no regulation.

 

[DudeistBelieve]

I'm kind of... ehhh on the sex worker thing after some of the shit I read about how legal brothels are run in parts of india where they basically torment the girls into staying in it like an abusive relationship.

I'm more interested in hearing about what they are gonna offer these sex workers. 401k? Health? Dental?

I also just see a whole bunch of logistical problems... like the dangerous parts of hooking aren't gonna disapear because you're setting is a coffee shop. You're still gonna get some sick twisted johns that want more to eat a scone, get blown and leave.

 

[DefunctTheory]

Like I said, I'd hope the UK would have similar laws. Then again, since brothels are illegal, I don't even know if registering as a prostitute is thing in the country. So even if they do have those laws, how could they enforce them?

Nope, we don't. If 2 people want to come to a private agreement in which sexual favours are exchanged for whatever, it's none of the law's business, but you can't solicit, run a brothel or live off immoral earnings (pimping). Otherwise there's no regulation.

Ah. Okee Dokee.

....If you want to get blown in a room filled with people and/or want to drink coffee in a place where someone is getting sucked off two tables over, then more power to you...I just don't see the appeal.

Oh, come on. You don't want sit in a room, drinking your coffee, looking around at all the faces of your fellow patrons?

 

[Fox12]

Hey, whatever floats your banana boat. I wonder if they serve caramel blondie.

How does one guarantee health and safety? Also, not sure if I would want to set my naked butt where a bunch of other dudes set their naked butts. The smell alone would be enough to chase me off. Could be an interesting place to people watch though.

 

[Canadamus Prime]

The thought of this makes me nauseous. Mostly because the concept of oral sex makes me nauseous. X__X

 

[FalloutJack]

I thought that was joke told by Denis Leary or George Carlin or something. WTF, mate?

 

[RaikuFA]

So I guess they'll be serving fappachinos?

Someone's cutting into my business...

My business now.

 

[-Dragmire-]

You know, the funniest thing would be if they legitimately had the best coffee and pastries in the city. Where people would go and order their food/drink and skip the service because the quality of goods was worth the outrageous asking price.