Love-kinda-sorta-triangle

[Kakashi on crack]

So... I was looking for advice on a rather awkward situation...

I like this girl (yeah I know what yoru thinking) but so does one of my really good friends.

The whole thing is I have no qualms with asking them out, but feel that I wouldn't make a very good boyfriend. (assuming she even agreed to go out) meanwhile I think my best friend would make a really good couple and I think they would get along a lot better than I would with her.

My best friend has admitted that he really wants to ask her out but he's too shy to. Mind you he told me this the night before I had planned to ask her out...

So, I told him that he should just try and ask her out, because frankly I think she has the hots for him anyways, and would prefer that the two of them are happy (since I'm still so-so about the idea anyways due to my workload at school.)

After arguing with him for a few moments, I agreed to drop the subject but told him that I still think that he should ask her out. (mind you he doesn't know that I've been thinking of asking her out)


So I'm just wondering... What should I do? I mean, I was thinking of asking her out anyways, but after this "revelation" I'd feel like an asshole if I did. I was thinking about letting the subject drop, but for some reason something in my head keeps telling me to try and hook them up...

 

[Giftfromme]

lol off course you're a good boyfriend for her. You can't just project into the future and discount yourself like that. If you didn't think you would make a good boyfriend, why bother asking her out? And how do you know she will make a good girlfriend? You're just assuming your friend and her will make a good couple, but people and circumstances do change. In regards to yourself, assume the best. If he is too shy, too bad too sad. If you don't ask her out someone else might and he may lose out anyway. Just don't let her come between you, there are plenty of fish in the sea. Basically, whoever wants it more should ask her out, and the other person should just drop it.

 

[Kakashi on crack]

Another thing I was wondering is if I do end up asking her out anyways, if I should tell him first so he has that chance to try and ask her out, keep any bad blood from developing afterall...

 

[Giftfromme]

Just tell him in no uncertain terms. You don't want things developing slowly in the shadows. Just be open about whatever it is you do. As long as both parties understand, it's fine, even if he doesn't agree 100%. He will get over that, rather then him thinking you are plotting things in the shadows or something.

 

[Kakashi on crack]

Hes actually the one saying hes too shy. Told him about a time I had been to shy to ask someone out and that seemed to do the trick. She said no to him due to not being ready for a relationship so I figure that sets up the stage that I shouldn't ask.

 

[Loner Jo Jo]

If you're only halfheartedly interested in starting a relationship right now, then I say let him have her. You don't have to help -- that's your call -- but there's no point in wasting her time when there is another guy who does want to be in a relationship with her.

If you really do want to be with her, may the best man win. All's fair...

 

[Wushu Panda]

my advice is grow a pair. you or your friend grow a pair and just ask the woman out. otherwise shes gonna find someone else and the both of you will live in regret.

 

[phazaar]

Decide for yourself, and then decide for your friend, as people have said. If he's a worthwhile friend, it won't matter either way (bros before hos), and if not, he'll probably get over it and then things will be back to normal anyway.

If all of that goes down the pan, you could always get together and suggest a bit of a menage a trois to break the ice

 

[smithy_2045]

Speaking from the perspective of your shy friend, if you asked out a girl after I told you I liked her, the friendship would be extremely strained, possibly beyond repair.