Love
- Thread starter Biosophilogical
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i think love is different for many people, but here's my take on it aafter being with my man for the last 8 years..
It isnt all about sex, but the sex helps for sure..you need be interested in trying new things together. Your chest feels like it may burst when you think of him/her. You feel safe with him/her. There is no "emotional dependence" but rather an emotional connection. You can spend time apart and never worry what the other is doing, but still miss each other. Trust. The idea of growing old and taking care of your partner actually sounds like a good thing. You can still make each other laugh even when so much time has passed. He/she makes your toes curl. You feel happy.. unexplainable happiness...even when times are hard, you still have this feelying of happiness. You have full respect for the other's goals and hopes for life. Respect in general. It's a little like being with your very best friend, but with a much more electric emotional connection.
It isnt all about sex, but the sex helps for sure..you need be interested in trying new things together. Your chest feels like it may burst when you think of him/her. You feel safe with him/her. There is no "emotional dependence" but rather an emotional connection. You can spend time apart and never worry what the other is doing, but still miss each other. Trust. The idea of growing old and taking care of your partner actually sounds like a good thing. You can still make each other laugh even when so much time has passed. He/she makes your toes curl. You feel happy.. unexplainable happiness...even when times are hard, you still have this feelying of happiness. You have full respect for the other's goals and hopes for life. Respect in general. It's a little like being with your very best friend, but with a much more electric emotional connection.
The Encyclopedia Galactica chapter on love states that it is far too complicated to define. The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy has this to say on the subject of love: avoid if at all possible.
In all sereousness I have no Idea beyond the chemical reaction and I don't know if I've ever been in love.
For me, love is comfort, real happiness, and caring for someone beyond sex.
The only way I can personally describe how the feeling affected me: It's warm.
When I met my husband, it was like the sun had finally dawned on me through all those years of drama, hatred, bitterness, and resentfulness that I had gone through since my pre-teens and teens, with 'love'. Terrible previous experiences with being in love and having my heart stomped on. My parents super ugly divorce and all my siblings relationships crumbling around them, probably should have broken me beyond repair, about relationships and 'love'.
My older relatives examples were the only thing that kept me believing that it wasn't all a big fat lie and that nobody was really in love. I have relatives that have been together, and married, for 50+ years and wouldn't change a thing. Still just as in love as they had been when they met.
Then I met my husband, and I found myself truly happy and accepted unconditionally by someone for the first time in my life. Someone who loved me back, and supported me when I needed him, and vice-versa.
I think love is hard to describe. To pin-point perfectly, but you'll know when it hits you. ^_^
(Btw, I love Zeithri's post.)
The only way I can personally describe how the feeling affected me: It's warm.
When I met my husband, it was like the sun had finally dawned on me through all those years of drama, hatred, bitterness, and resentfulness that I had gone through since my pre-teens and teens, with 'love'. Terrible previous experiences with being in love and having my heart stomped on. My parents super ugly divorce and all my siblings relationships crumbling around them, probably should have broken me beyond repair, about relationships and 'love'.
My older relatives examples were the only thing that kept me believing that it wasn't all a big fat lie and that nobody was really in love. I have relatives that have been together, and married, for 50+ years and wouldn't change a thing. Still just as in love as they had been when they met.
Then I met my husband, and I found myself truly happy and accepted unconditionally by someone for the first time in my life. Someone who loved me back, and supported me when I needed him, and vice-versa.
I think love is hard to describe. To pin-point perfectly, but you'll know when it hits you. ^_^
(Btw, I love Zeithri's post.)
I am 18 and have never had a real relationship, but I would speculate that love is when being with a person makes sorrow and most other crap in life feel far away.
Love means alot of things for different people.
Because you probably don't love the same things as I do.
Or do you love the same woman as I do.
Because love is everything and love is nothing.
Because you probably don't love the same things as I do.
Or do you love the same woman as I do.
Because love is everything and love is nothing.
Love should be an emotion as strong as cutting your limbs off, except the opposite spectrum. Anything less is not love. And the "hormone thing"... please... the hormones just stimulate love. Having it set on overdrive and others complaining just shows how they wish they were you. It's natural either way.
And, no. You can't love cookies. Unless you're brain-impaired and love food.
And, no. You can't love cookies. Unless you're brain-impaired and love food.
Technically love is momentary insanity. Your brain is just cranking out extra endorphins as a sneaky way to make you procreate.
I just made a similar post in a different topic about online love, but here's my answer:
I've been very interested in what exactly it is that makes people love another person. It seems pheromones have something to do with it somewhere in the brain but it isn't really clear yet what triggers it. Sufficed to say it makes you feel really great whenever you're with that person, because you like what you see (every flaw that person might have is turned into a positive), you like what you hear (everything that person says to you is awesome), you like what you smell (people in love nearly always think the other smells better than average!), and you like what you touch (no comment). Whenever you're not with this person, you want to be with this person because he/she makes you feel great. This is basically the 'love' we're talking about in the teenage years and when people talk about love they usually mean this experience.
As to why a particular person? It seems to be more of a reaction, with being yourself the key to unlock it. If you hang out with a certain person and it's fun while you can be yourself, you will probably want to meet up again with that person (date again) and so on. If it keeps getting more fun, and a mutual attraction and passion is growing, then soon enough there will be a romantic relationship.
Love is, however, broader than simply an attraction to someone. There is also love in a way that with this particular person you can see a bright future, whatever that may be. The passion described above is not relevant for whether you want to have a future with this particular person. There is also a friendly love, the kind parents have for their for children for example. Parents love their children, but they don't want sex with their children. If you find someone for which you feel passion, friendly love & a bright future then people speak of 'true love', because it should fulfil every desire in a relationship.
Most people at 16 didn't have the experience of 'true love' yet, mostly because most 16 year olds aren't concerned with their life in 10 years or so. There's absolutely nothing wrong with this, it's actually a good thing because this way you can enjoy your present life a lot more, but most (there are exceptions) relationships in your teens are simply passion. This comes and goes and that's why a lot of people have many boyfriends & girlfriends in their teens.
Bottom Line: If you feel you love someone, then go for it. There is no and there will never be an exact definition, so with regard to love - do whatever feels right and makes you happy :]
I've been very interested in what exactly it is that makes people love another person. It seems pheromones have something to do with it somewhere in the brain but it isn't really clear yet what triggers it. Sufficed to say it makes you feel really great whenever you're with that person, because you like what you see (every flaw that person might have is turned into a positive), you like what you hear (everything that person says to you is awesome), you like what you smell (people in love nearly always think the other smells better than average!), and you like what you touch (no comment). Whenever you're not with this person, you want to be with this person because he/she makes you feel great. This is basically the 'love' we're talking about in the teenage years and when people talk about love they usually mean this experience.
As to why a particular person? It seems to be more of a reaction, with being yourself the key to unlock it. If you hang out with a certain person and it's fun while you can be yourself, you will probably want to meet up again with that person (date again) and so on. If it keeps getting more fun, and a mutual attraction and passion is growing, then soon enough there will be a romantic relationship.
Love is, however, broader than simply an attraction to someone. There is also love in a way that with this particular person you can see a bright future, whatever that may be. The passion described above is not relevant for whether you want to have a future with this particular person. There is also a friendly love, the kind parents have for their for children for example. Parents love their children, but they don't want sex with their children. If you find someone for which you feel passion, friendly love & a bright future then people speak of 'true love', because it should fulfil every desire in a relationship.
Most people at 16 didn't have the experience of 'true love' yet, mostly because most 16 year olds aren't concerned with their life in 10 years or so. There's absolutely nothing wrong with this, it's actually a good thing because this way you can enjoy your present life a lot more, but most (there are exceptions) relationships in your teens are simply passion. This comes and goes and that's why a lot of people have many boyfriends & girlfriends in their teens.
To answer your question directly: I think you're pretty accurate, but I just wanted to add you can still truly love someone while still being able to let them go once in a while, like if you marry someone who's in the military. Mutual respect (friendship part) and lust (passion) should definitely be part of it, although the former is more important than the latter in the later stages, since passion usually fades but the mutual respect keeps people together for a long time
Bottom Line: If you feel you love someone, then go for it. There is no and there will never be an exact definition, so with regard to love - do whatever feels right and makes you happy :]
Love is staying with your partner all night long after a terrible car crash, cleaning the snot and gunk from the tubes inserted into their nose.Biosophilogical said:
Love is actually more common than lust, in my opinion. You love your parents, and your family, and some of your friends. These are people who you think about when they're not around you, and who you will regret leaving. You wouldn't dream of hurting them. You know you can ask them for things when you need them. You know they'll be proactive in helping you, if you keep them informed of your life [footnote]("I heard about this thing on the news and thought you might want to go with me")[/footnote].
As a famous song [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FmnDXRJ7btE] says:
So yes. I've found love. I've not really found that kind of 'lust' however. Let's call it infatuation. It's commonly mistaken for love, but it is not love. That feeling I hear talked about that makes my male friends put pictures of themselves with their ladies on their phones, and find all aspects of their personality endearing. The feeling that causes you to do stupid things for people. It's an addiction, nothing more.
I sure as shit don't find all aspects of my parents' personalities likeable, but I would stay with them all the same, in sickness and in health, because I love them. I wouldn't kill myself to save them, because they wouldn't want that. I will happily disagree with them, and not do things with them, because I know that they'll never leave- 'till death do us part.
Love, as it says, is long and boring.
That is love. I feel truly sorry for those who have never felt it or received it.
NB- A random aside, because I love this scene and it's vaguely relevant.
Well, he IS undead, isn't he?RobCoxxy said:
OT: Love exists. Surprise surprise. Some people have good experiences, some have bad. It's a risk, a gamble. It makes you stupid, but blissfully ignorant. All in all, it's mostly poetic. Both tragically and romantically.
Is it wrong that when I read the OP, I started singing the Elephant Love Song Medley from Moulin Rouge...god I'm a disgrace...
Anyway, It really depends what school you adhere to. Some say it's a biological phenomenon others say it's something ethereal and grand that no other thing in the world can top. Personally, I think it's just nice to be around someone you like, and not wanting to be around anyone else but that person.
Anyway, It really depends what school you adhere to. Some say it's a biological phenomenon others say it's something ethereal and grand that no other thing in the world can top. Personally, I think it's just nice to be around someone you like, and not wanting to be around anyone else but that person.