Mall Fight RP: (CLOSED) (FINISHED)

[ShindoL Shill]

"You're right, Paddy. The people living here may be in dire need of our help."
I load my Molotov launcher.
"So let's just deal with their problems swiftly and efficiently."
I take aim at a building.

 

[DotSlash]

"Trilby, I'd like to have a relaxing bus ride to the spaceport. Not one where we're being gunned down by everyone in this town."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"Exactly. And I'm guaranteeing that by killing everyone before they can gun us down. It's called tactics, Slashy."

 

[DotSlash]

"But you'd save ammo and time by just getting the hell out now. It's not like we've pissed off the entire town... yet... On second thought.... go for it."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

I start shooting Molotovs at the buildings.
"Perfect."
I get on the bus.

 

[MinimanZombie]

I sigh.
"Ain't no rest for the wicked. Ain't that right Tril?"

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"Yeah, there is."
I put a pillow on my seat and fall asleep.

 

[MinimanZombie]

"...Well damn." I eat a burrito.

 

[Paddy the Second]

"Oh man I hate long bus rides."

 

[Saltarius]

"...We could just ride Aleksei and Dimitri there."

 

[MinimanZombie]

"That won't be possible."
I pull a blanket off something. It reveals large coffins.
"We are here today to remember the two young, baby rhinos Aleksei and Dimitri."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"Especially when the bus doesn't even seem to be moving."

I look at the coffins.
"How in the hell did you get them on the bus?"

 

[Saltarius]

"...WHAT IS THERE LEFT IN MY LIFE!?"

I lean on the coffins and weep.

 

[MinimanZombie]

"They were young, and unfortunately, were likely caught in the Mall Fire of 2012. If Salt would like to-" The coffins tip over, and a ton of chicken eggs fall out.
"The fuck?"

 

[Saltarius]

"THEY WERE SO YOUNG! IT'S WOON! IF HE NEVER FUCKING KILLED THEIR MOTHER, THEY'D BE ALIVE AND WELL!"

 

[MinimanZombie]

Millions of chicks hatch.
"...Uh..."

 

[ShindoL Shill]

"Wow, Salt. Just dismiss all of us as significant parts of your life. Jackass."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"OH GOD THEY'RE EVERYWHERE!"

 

[Saltarius]

"...The fuck bro."

I'm swarmed by baby chicks.

"There had better be some damn corn feed nearby."

 

[Paddy the Second]

"We're in a frontier town of course there is."