Mario gets "What" as a reward?

[stupenderifous]

So, Mario rescues Princess Peach and she rewards him with cake. Alright, that's fine. However, I think it would show that Nintendo has a lot of balls if Princess Peach rewarded Mario with "Pie". I mean, come on. We are all thinking that there is more to this cake thing. Why not just make a joke of the whole situation and make it "Pie"?

I think that it would be funny, at least.

What do you think?

 

[Rawne1980]

I think they should get rid of the cake, abandon euphemism's entirely and either let the poor hairy lipped bastard get laid (after this many years of rescuing the same bloody girl he deserves it) or she needs to sit him down and tell him once and for all that she loves him ..... like a brother.

And then he needs to tell her to stop getting kidnapped every ... bloody ... year or the next game they release he will call "Peach kidnapped ... Mario gives zero fucks and leaves the silly girl to rot".

 

[crazyrabbits]

IAnd then he needs to tell her to stop getting kidnapped every ... bloody ... year or the next game they release he will call "Peach kidnapped ... Mario gives zero fucks and leaves the silly girl to rot".

I'd love to see a Mario game where, after the Princess gets inevitably kidnapped again, Mario goes to the airport and buys a round-trip ticket to Maui, then lounges on a beach playing volleyball and ogling women for the entirety of the game. Meanwhile, Bowser keeps sending him letters talking about all the horrible things he's doing to the Princess, and Mario laughs before throwing them all in the trash. At one point, Toad tries to go bring Mario back to the Mushroom Kingdom, but he gets mistaken for a luggage case and ends up getting shipped to Dinosaur Island or something - specifics aren't really important.

At the end, Mario would come back to the Mushroom Kingdom, only to find it a bombed-out, charred wreck, with all of the denizens sold into slavery in another continent. It would win GOTY.

 

[stupenderifous]

IAnd then he needs to tell her to stop getting kidnapped every ... bloody ... year or the next game they release he will call "Peach kidnapped ... Mario gives zero fucks and leaves the silly girl to rot".

I'd love to see a Mario game where, after the Princess gets inevitably kidnapped again, Mario goes to the airport and buys a round-trip ticket to Maui, then lounges on a beach playing volleyball and ogling women for the entirety of the game. Meanwhile, Bowser keeps sending him letters talking about all the horrible things he's doing to the Princess, and Mario laughs before throwing them all in the trash. At one point, Toad tries to go bring Mario back to the Mushroom Kingdom, but he gets mistaken for a luggage case and ends up getting shipped to Dinosaur Island or something - specifics aren't really important.

At the end, Mario would come back to the Mushroom Kingdom, only to find it a bombed-out, charred wreck, with all of the denizens sold into slavery in another continent. It would win GOTY.

I would buy that. Seriously, that would be awesome.

 

[Solo-Wing]

IAnd then he needs to tell her to stop getting kidnapped every ... bloody ... year or the next game they release he will call "Peach kidnapped ... Mario gives zero fucks and leaves the silly girl to rot".

I'd love to see a Mario game where, after the Princess gets inevitably kidnapped again, Mario goes to the airport and buys a round-trip ticket to Maui, then lounges on a beach playing volleyball and ogling women for the entirety of the game. Meanwhile, Bowser keeps sending him letters talking about all the horrible things he's doing to the Princess, and Mario laughs before throwing them all in the trash. At one point, Toad tries to go bring Mario back to the Mushroom Kingdom, but he gets mistaken for a luggage case and ends up getting shipped to Dinosaur Island or something - specifics aren't really important.

At the end, Mario would come back to the Mushroom Kingdom, only to find it a bombed-out, charred wreck, with all of the denizens sold into slavery in another continent. It would win GOTY.

I would laugh if it just did the thing in Megamind where everything is fine when Mario Comes back cause the villain is just absolutely fucking bored cause he has noone to fight. Really Bowser is pretty much that kinda person from what the Mario and Luigi games as well as the Paper Mario games tell me. I think he only kidnaps now cause it is basically all he knows. Hell he probably does not hit on Peach anymore.

 

[LobsterFeng]

IAnd then he needs to tell her to stop getting kidnapped every ... bloody ... year or the next game they release he will call "Peach kidnapped ... Mario gives zero fucks and leaves the silly girl to rot".

I'd love to see a Mario game where, after the Princess gets inevitably kidnapped again, Mario goes to the airport and buys a round-trip ticket to Maui, then lounges on a beach playing volleyball and ogling women for the entirety of the game. Meanwhile, Bowser keeps sending him letters talking about all the horrible things he's doing to the Princess, and Mario laughs before throwing them all in the trash. At one point, Toad tries to go bring Mario back to the Mushroom Kingdom, but he gets mistaken for a luggage case and ends up getting shipped to Dinosaur Island or something - specifics aren't really important.

At the end, Mario would come back to the Mushroom Kingdom, only to find it a bombed-out, charred wreck, with all of the denizens sold into slavery in another continent. It would win GOTY.

It'd be even funnier if Bowser had some sort of villainous breakdown. Like the Joker the only reason he's doing this is because Mario completes him. He realizes kidnapping Peach will no longer draw Mario's attention, so the whole game turns into a crime thriller with Bowser always one step ahead of Mario.

 

[Loop Stricken]

It's like none of you even read Nerf Now [http://www.nerfnow.com/comic/906].

 

[scorptatious]

I like to think Peach and Bowser are having a secret affair, and this whole kidnapping business is this weird sexual fantasy they have that Mario (the poor bastard) has no idea about.

Now that I think about it, it's even weirder when you think about how Peach was imprisoned in Super Mario 64.

 

[Kpt._Rob]

...

Because that's not really what Mario is about. The cake is the kind of charming childish thing that's just really easy to misinterpret. I really don't think that there's some official at Nintendo using cake as a metaphor for sex. The cake is literal. It's just cake. The cake characterizes Mario perfectly. He's the sort of character who will risk life and limb, complete herculean tasks, and sacrifice everything to save his friend, just to do what's right, and for delicious baked goods. We're old enough that we can look at things like the cake and willfully misinterpret them for a laugh, and that's fine, but I really don't think Mario games would be even slightly improved by the decision to play to that sort of lowest common denominator humor. Mario games are about charm and whimsy, and that's all they should be about. Actually making a Mario game where he wins "pie" would be a betrayal of the willfully innocent tones that have long defined the series. Not everything has to be "mature" (quotes very intentional) or be a sex joke. Some things can just be simple, and beautiful for that simplicity. Mario is one of those things.

 

[Starik20X6]

-snip-

We have a winner ladies and gentlemen!

I've never understood the need people feel to add 'mature' stuff where it's not asked for.

 

[Neverhoodian]

...

Because that's not really what Mario is about. The cake is the kind of charming childish thing that's just really easy to misinterpret. I really don't think that there's some official at Nintendo using cake as a metaphor for sex. The cake is literal. It's just cake. The cake characterizes Mario perfectly. He's the sort of character who will risk life and limb, complete herculean tasks, and sacrifice everything to save his friend, just to do what's right, and for delicious baked goods. We're old enough that we can look at things like the cake and willfully misinterpret them for a laugh, and that's fine, but I really don't think Mario games would be even slightly improved by the decision to play to that sort of lowest common denominator humor. Mario games are about charm and whimsy, and that's all they should be about. Actually making a Mario game where he wins "pie" would be a betrayal of the willfully innocent tones that have long defined the series. Not everything has to be "mature" (quotes very intentional) or be a sex joke. Some things can just be simple, and beautiful for that simplicity. Mario is one of those things.

This. Dear God, this.

A big part of Mario's charm is that it's a family-friendly series. Trying to make it "edgy" would absolutely wreck it. Hell, they tried it once, and look what happened...

Spoiler

KILL IT KILL IT KILL IT​

I'm not opposed to "mature" content, but I think a series known for its innocence and child-like whimsy should stay that way.