Mental Health

[Vidiot]

Well according to my parents I have the so called Asperger syndrome.
Not officialy diagnosed with it, but the symptoms are there.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asperger_syndrome

I had no idea Bear! But, I'm in somewhat the same boat as you, though with a professional diagnosis, coupled with rather severe social anxiety.

Example: Recently, in my 3v3 Starcraft 2 team, one of my other team-mates invited a new person so we could play 4v4, now, the other two team-mates are my Uncle and a friend of his respectively, so I was pretty used to talking to them on Skype during matches. Anyway, despite being assured that the new guy was a nice guy, I completely freaked and made up about having to go carry a computer into the house or something, and that the others should just play on without me. So, without waiting for the new guy to come on, I just quit the game right there and didn't play for a whole week.

Now...all through this, all sorts of crazy crap was going through my head: Were they replacing me? Who the hell is this guy? etc. All of which sent me spiralling into a few days of depression and self pity.

Eventually, I started playing again, and, shortly after that I realized what an idiot I had been and actually asked myself if we could invite the new guy to play. And yeah, he was a nice guy, and I got over it. Problem is, I regularly have such episodes, where something stupidly minor gets way overinflated in my head. I'll spend hours thinking about it, often getting quite strong suicidal thoughts and depressed and then, pop, I forget about it and everything is dandy.

I used to be like that when I was younger, after going to therapy for 3 years when I was 12 to 15 I still clamp up if I have to call someone I never called before, still sound nervous on the phone to anyone and I have a hard time actually going up to strangers and talk to them, get nervous, start stuttering and sweaty hands xD

That's why I start with jokes and keep the jokes flowing regularly when talking =/

Similar story here. My biggest problem now isn't the episodes themselves, but someone always seems to figure out how to exploit it, and convinces me that "they're all out to get me" for a week or so, wherein I destroy friendships, relationships, and nearly a marriage trying to figure out who is actually manipulating me. I feel like the guy from "Memento." When everyone tells you that everyone else is manipulating you, who do you believe? or do you just cut them all off and live as a hermit out of fear? It's not as bad since I got married, but I still have episodes a few times a year.

 

[RaphaelsRedemption]

snippy

No need to apologize for the wall at all it was an interesting read and a bit of an eye opener, I had no idea of the effects of bi-polar disorder until now. Nice to see your feeling a bit better these days

I cant really imagine what that would be like, I'm one of those people who doesnt really have to worry about chemical imbalances in my brain. Living carefree, college, the odd bit of work, drinking, partying... I've been rather lucky if I'm honest. Some of the people I see in work can at times break your heart, most of them are never going to get out for the rest of their lives. One of the patients has been there since she was 14, she's now about 50 :/

So hmmmm a few questions, when did you start to notice the effects of being bi-polar? Something like that in school (which can be a nightmare for some people on its own) couldn't have been too convenient I bet :/

Family, meds and therapy are some of the things you mentioned that have helped you, any others? Music, pets, computer games, The Escapist maybe?

One of the things I find that helps me if I'm a bit down is taking our dog for a walk in the fields near our house. Just walking hearing all the birds and all that jaz, cliche I know but apparently being amongst nature is great for your mind. It (for me anyway) relaxes the mind, helps thoughts flow freely. For example just recently I had a massive project to do for college that I was a bit worried about, had a bit of a writers block(couldn't concentrate) so nothing was getting written or researched casuing me to get worse.

Went for a really long walk with the dog, came home and blazed my way through research papers etc... eventually putting about 1500 well referenced words into my project in one day which I was delighted with. After that the rest of the project was just hard work with no worry at all which was great hehe =P

I think I've always been bipolar, at least from my teens. I was a "difficult" teenager, labelled as moody, impulsive and emotional. Now I think I was showing signs of bipolar mood swings even then, but my mum thought it was just normal teenaged growing pains. It's not her fault, I am her first child.

The warning signs should have started to show more clearly when I finished school though. I tried several universities, courses and jobs, and found real trouble studying, relating to people, and ability to work, even though I really wanted to do well. My life became very painful, and I eventually left home and moved across country to Perth (a mere 5 hour plane flight). There I had very few friends, a poverty-line existence and the most basic of jobs working in a cafe. Life began to spiral out of control as I found work harder and harder to deal with. I started having panic attacks, although I didn't know what they were. I thought it was all because I was a bad and unlikeable person, and to punish myself I would cut myself.

Eventually, someone told me what I was feeling was not normal. You must understand, I had no idea what normal was, and had so few friends I couldn't really measure myself against them. Then I began seeing a doctor. After a year of counselling, it was decided I was bipolar, and I've been trying to learn about it and control it ever since.

I've found several things helpful in managing my condition beside the obvious ones of family, friends, meds and therapy. One is art. I'm a very capable digital artist, although I've never made money from my art. It doesn't matter if no one ever sees it, because it's the creating that helps me. Also I have two dogs now, two big Belgian Shepherds, and caring for them is a real help for me.

The other thing that helps me stay sane is a very fixed routine. I plan my days carefully now, and it helps me avoid anxiety and impulsive behaviours. I get up at 5, am at work by 6.30, on the bus home by 10.30, do washing and household work until lunch, and then relax and do art, game, etc. until my fiance comes home. It sounds boring, but after so much mental turmoil, being able to stick to a routine is amazing.

Thanks for asking these questions, and my apologies for taking so long in replying!

 

[KiKiweaky]

I think I've always been bipolar, at least from my teens. I was a "difficult" teenager, labelled as moody, impulsive and emotional. Now I think I was showing signs of bipolar mood swings even then, but my mum thought it was just normal teenaged growing pains. It's not her fault, I am her first child.

The warning signs should have started to show more clearly when I finished school though. I tried several universities, courses and jobs, and found real trouble studying, relating to people, and ability to work, even though I really wanted to do well. My life became very painful, and I eventually left home and moved across country to Perth (a mere 5 hour plane flight). There I had very few friends, a poverty-line existence and the most basic of jobs working in a cafe. Life began to spiral out of control as I found work harder and harder to deal with. I started having panic attacks, although I didn't know what they were. I thought it was all because I was a bad and unlikeable person, and to punish myself I would cut myself.

Eventually, someone told me what I was feeling was not normal. You must understand, I had no idea what normal was, and had so few friends I couldn't really measure myself against them. Then I began seeing a doctor. After a year of counselling, it was decided I was bipolar, and I've been trying to learn about it and control it ever since.

I've found several things helpful in managing my condition beside the obvious ones of family, friends, meds and therapy. One is art. I'm a very capable digital artist, although I've never made money from my art. It doesn't matter if no one ever sees it, because it's the creating that helps me. Also I have two dogs now, two big Belgian Shepherds, and caring for them is a real help for me.

The other thing that helps me stay sane is a very fixed routine. I plan my days carefully now, and it helps me avoid anxiety and impulsive behaviours. I get up at 5, am at work by 6.30, on the bus home by 10.30, do washing and household work until lunch, and then relax and do art, game, etc. until my fiance comes home. It sounds boring, but after so much mental turmoil, being able to stick to a routine is amazing.

Thanks for asking these questions, and my apologies for taking so long in replying!

No worries.

Normal routines never really worked for me, my sleeping patterns are all over the place right now. I can swing my sleeping times by 8 - 12 hours in one day, by either staying up stupidly late or just not going to sleep at all. Glad to say they are after finding some form of normality now, winter here atm and I generally dont see daylight. But I've been going to bed early and getting up early lately which is unheard of

Glad to see you can draw comfort from simple things aswell, I'm a firm believer that if you want to be dazzled your entire life you wont last very long haha, take it easy anwyay =D