Salutations my fellow computeneering enthusiasts! This week I will be reviewing a game for your personal computer (or 'PC' as us in the know like to call it).
Minesweeper is without a doubt the game of the year. You may scoff dear readers at my bold exclamations, proclamations, assertions and gesticulations, but I assure you that the title is not without merit, as Minesweeper delivers some of the most tense game play I've ever seen.
I would go as far as to suggest that it offers the same thrills and spills as Solitaire, it's that good. But enough of me singing praises, that will get us nowhere and often lands me with a restraining order for following Betty Marone home and serenading her on my replica lute.
Minesweeper brings you the fast paced, white-knuckled thrill ride of the world of mine sweeping. Without having gone to the wilds of Rhodesia and Vietnam to experience the practice myself, I can safely say that this game delivers all the life-threatening pressure of the real thing. I had to even change my pants at one point!
The game works like this. Once you execute the executable file, you are presented with one of the most expertly rendered grids that I have seen in a long while. It's almost like the real thing! Once you are presented with this grid, you manipulate your mouse to deliver the cursor over one of the squares that make up the grid.
Now the real stuff begins! My dad was in Vietnam, and he says that you find out about yourself under the duress of a life-or-death situation, he also says that I should move out, but that's besides the point dear computerneering enthusiasts!
Once you click, there's no going back as one you release the primary function button it's do or die. Sink or swim. Glory or defeat. Getting Betty Marone to go to the Springtime Pumpkin Dance with you or spending the night crying while watching her through binoculars. Once you click, you either reveal a number or a mine.
If it's a mine, your game is over! You've tripped up the mine sensors and you've exploded it! You've exploded it! However, if you get a number, then you're still in the game! Yay!
The numbers range from one to eight and indicate just how many mines are in the surrounding eight squares. This is where the simple beauty of minesweeper really comes to the fore, as you start to plot your next move. The pressure fellow computeneering enthusiasts, the pressure!
Sometimes...it can just get a little too much so you look out the window to take a break and you see Betty with that Chad Chesterton and then you remember how he stuffed you in the locker and you start to plot your revenge.
Sorry, it seems I have deviated from the original point!
You can win the game by locating all the mines by process of elimination, which in my mind is the best kind of process...damn that Chad....
It has all the grace and intellectual brutality as a game of chess with Grand Master Kasparov as you think your way through the ingenious levels of strategy needed to unlock the grid and win the game...except potentially explosive.
KABOOM!
Words simply can not describe the sheer thrill of this game, and the hours you will spend playing this game will no doubt serve to dull painful repressed memories from your childhood which is always a bonus.
As much as I have expressed praise and platitudes on the game, I can't help to wonder with a tinge of sadness where video gaming on the personal computer can possibly go from here. Surely, with Minesweeper, we have the Mona Lisa of our dreams? This could very well be the end of personal video gaming!
Tune in next time to see if I'm wrong fellow computeneering enthusiasts!
P.S- I'm so lonely
Minesweeper is without a doubt the game of the year. You may scoff dear readers at my bold exclamations, proclamations, assertions and gesticulations, but I assure you that the title is not without merit, as Minesweeper delivers some of the most tense game play I've ever seen.
I would go as far as to suggest that it offers the same thrills and spills as Solitaire, it's that good. But enough of me singing praises, that will get us nowhere and often lands me with a restraining order for following Betty Marone home and serenading her on my replica lute.
Minesweeper brings you the fast paced, white-knuckled thrill ride of the world of mine sweeping. Without having gone to the wilds of Rhodesia and Vietnam to experience the practice myself, I can safely say that this game delivers all the life-threatening pressure of the real thing. I had to even change my pants at one point!
The game works like this. Once you execute the executable file, you are presented with one of the most expertly rendered grids that I have seen in a long while. It's almost like the real thing! Once you are presented with this grid, you manipulate your mouse to deliver the cursor over one of the squares that make up the grid.
Now the real stuff begins! My dad was in Vietnam, and he says that you find out about yourself under the duress of a life-or-death situation, he also says that I should move out, but that's besides the point dear computerneering enthusiasts!
Once you click, there's no going back as one you release the primary function button it's do or die. Sink or swim. Glory or defeat. Getting Betty Marone to go to the Springtime Pumpkin Dance with you or spending the night crying while watching her through binoculars. Once you click, you either reveal a number or a mine.
If it's a mine, your game is over! You've tripped up the mine sensors and you've exploded it! You've exploded it! However, if you get a number, then you're still in the game! Yay!
The numbers range from one to eight and indicate just how many mines are in the surrounding eight squares. This is where the simple beauty of minesweeper really comes to the fore, as you start to plot your next move. The pressure fellow computeneering enthusiasts, the pressure!
Sometimes...it can just get a little too much so you look out the window to take a break and you see Betty with that Chad Chesterton and then you remember how he stuffed you in the locker and you start to plot your revenge.
Sorry, it seems I have deviated from the original point!
You can win the game by locating all the mines by process of elimination, which in my mind is the best kind of process...damn that Chad....
It has all the grace and intellectual brutality as a game of chess with Grand Master Kasparov as you think your way through the ingenious levels of strategy needed to unlock the grid and win the game...except potentially explosive.
KABOOM!
Words simply can not describe the sheer thrill of this game, and the hours you will spend playing this game will no doubt serve to dull painful repressed memories from your childhood which is always a bonus.
As much as I have expressed praise and platitudes on the game, I can't help to wonder with a tinge of sadness where video gaming on the personal computer can possibly go from here. Surely, with Minesweeper, we have the Mona Lisa of our dreams? This could very well be the end of personal video gaming!
Tune in next time to see if I'm wrong fellow computeneering enthusiasts!
P.S- I'm so lonely
