Most Insufferable Friendly AI

[Fidelias]

Halo 2. I can't even count the number of times those retarded marines kept running me and my friend over with those damn warthogs. It got so bad that we decided to just blow up any warthog we found.

 

[natster43]

Out of the countless games I'm sure you have played, which one boasted the most unbearably stupid or unintentionally hilarious freindly AI behavior?

Right now I'm playing Dead Rising 2, and the survivors you escort back to the safehouse are amazingly thick, getting stuck and doing circles on bits of scenery, unable to think for themselves that instead of repelling the endless flesh ocean of zombies away with feeble girly slaps they should pick up the f*cking sledgehammer thats lying right next to them and wail away. But no, you have to get directly infront of them and hand it to them yourself.

Anyway, thats just my most recent aggrivating experience. What are yours? Squad mates strafing infront of your crosshairs? Having to rely on an AI controlled character to perform a certain action that just doesent want to happen? Have a gripe!

If you think that is bad. Play the original Dead Rising. They are twice as stupid. Also will cause more damage to you than the Zombies will.

 

[repeating integers]

I love Halo but I tried to avoid the marines when possible,
BUT! my opinion changed when they saved me a few days ago in reach: a ghost was just ready to hit me when a warthog full of marines almost did a suicide crash into it thus saving me a splatter dead. GO MARINES!

Actually they're UNSC army personnel, a different branch to the Marines... maybe that explains it, lol.

 

[MrShowerHead]

Red Faction Guerrilla

Operation Flashpoint 2.

What is the point of being able to order your team to stand behind a wall and provide covering fire, when what they actually do is stand beside or in front of that wall, and get shot whilst looking the OTHER WAY at the pretty twees on the other side of the map?

Then they actually complain you are getting them shot. I gave it a chance, but eventually I decided that a game shouldnt make my blood pressure spike to 140/100 and have veins pop out my head. Im getting old.

I guess it's /thread

Just played Guerilla about 15 minutes ago. Ugh....

As for OFPR..... Yeah, it would be nice if they would

1) Follow my commands
2) Fire at the enemy
3) Not kill me with a rocket launcher

 

[Krantos]

Operation Flashpoint 2.

What is the point of being able to order your team to stand behind a wall and provide covering fire, when what they actually do is stand beside or in front of that wall, and get shot whilst looking the OTHER WAY at the pretty twees on the other side of the map?

Then they actually complain you are getting them shot. I gave it a chance, but eventually I decided that a game shouldnt make my blood pressure spike to 140/100 and have veins pop out my head.

This, definitely this. Even with the "ultimate AI Mod" they still act like they've been beaten with the stupid stick. It's a shame too, because if it wasn't for them and the horrible squad commands, the game would be awesome.
Oh, and yes, the not checking to see if you're in their line of fire, is hell. Rocket launcher is worst, but I've taken more than a few bullets to the back when all the enemies are to the front.

It's been said before but Oblivion.

Now I'm obsessive with keeping all NPCs I can alive. Kvatch guards, Knights Of The Nine, and anyone else with a name that can die. Which Is why I'm angry whenever one of these dense bastards is found by me dead on the road next to a Land Dreugh. I don't care if you have a scaled dagger and magic run from the monster!

This too.

When I found out you could get followers in Oblivion I was pysched. Until I actually did. Wow. Talk about worthless. Especially if you're a ranged character since they seem to purposefully jump in the way of your shots.

 

[Prometherion]

Dead Rising 1. The survivors thought standing next to a bench in a zombie filled mall was a good idea. Or that running through the middle of a crowd of zombies was preferable to running AROUND said zombies.

Basically I saved no-one in my playthrough purely because such retardation should not be allowed to reproduce.

Euthanasia much?

 

[Mr. Omega]

Your team in StarFox. Y'know why? All other AI tries to be good, but ends up failing. These morons are deliberately designed to suck so bad you need to constantly save them.

 

[meepop]

Left 4 Dead with the AI (Artificial Idiot(s)), because they startle the witch, take healing items that YOU with one fifth of your life bar need as opposed to their 80, green-colored life bar. They also don't exactly make you feel better when you've lost half your life shooting zombies and they've saved you and the two others, killed apparently more zombies than you, and still have 20 more health than you.

 

[PureChaos]

they all bad. i bet the woman from Resi Evil 5 will win this

 

[JourneyThroughHell]

Could be Red Faction: Guerilla, especially worsened by the fact that it had a large amount of rescue missions.

"Hey, what's that? You made a perfectly good, unguarded hole in the wall so we could all get to your vehicle fast? Hahah. You're funny. Don't we have guarded doors where we can easily get killed? Yeah. Let's do that."

 

[The_root_of_all_evil]

[HEADING=2]HI! I'M EDDIE YOUR SHIPBOARD COMPUTER AND I KNOW WE'RE GOING TO GET ON FABULOUSLY!![/HEADING]

Ghastly. It all is.

 

[linkzeldi]

Socom 4. Shoot the enemies and stop running into a wall.

 

[TheYellowCellPhone]

The marine in Half-Life: Opposing Force.

Well, the AI can be blamed on the game's age.

 

[supermariner]

I know it's been said
but it can't be said enough
that Sheva from Resi Evil 5 was the worst kind of AI fuck-up imaginable
when she wasn't constantly dashing past my crosshairs she would more than likely be getting her arse kicked and polluting my lovely zombie-smashing soundwaves with her whiny ass *****-killing shriek

 

[Daffy F]

Red Faction guerrilla

Oh my goodness this. I can't even begin to shout about the irritations those Fucktards caused me... Hey! Let's help him! *Dies* -Population demoralised- FUUUU-.
Another one of mine would have to be on Age of empires 2: The conquerors. I was playing 2 vs 2 random game (Me and an AI vs 2 AIs) and my ally was the koreans. Since we were on a map with no water, for some reason the AI kinda broke and didn't upgrade any of his units, and spam-built militia. He ended up with about 150 milita that were slaughtered by our enemies... Talk about worthless.

 

[Fwee]

Mass effect 2 seemed to have ok AI, until I tried insane mode.

Okay I'm glad that it seems to be in just insane mode. I though the AI in ME1 was okay, not the best, and then I load my previous save in ME2 and decide to go for the Insane difficulty achievement right away. Team members are CONSTANTLY running straight up to enemies, not shooting, and getting taken out. Super annoying.
And I used to absolutely hate Left 4 Dead's AI, until I played Left 4 Dead 2. Then I remembered how good I had it.

 

[Daffy F]

Dead Rising 1. The survivors thought standing next to a bench in a zombie filled mall was a good idea. Or that running through the middle of a crowd of zombies was preferable to running AROUND said zombies.

Basically I saved no-one in my playthrough purely because such retardation should not be allowed to reproduce.

Euthanasia much?

Oh good god. At least you never tried to get 'Frank the pimp' That wsa HARD to get....

 

[the_maestro_sartori]

 

[Pillypill]

Any human in any halo game... H2 had good enough ai for its elites though.

I know it's been said already but sheva is just terrible; never mind taking your ammo or not pointing the lamp where you want it, she's stopeed me running away from zombies with chainsaws by standing and falling around in a door and when they hacked me up she still did fuck all about it.