My Fallout 3 experience

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NATO.Caliber

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Jan 26, 2008
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I still remember the first time I played this game.

Once I got out of Vault 101, I went to Megaton, the nearby city, to ask about my dad, and Colin Moriarty told me to find the Galaxy News Radio station.

Anyway, after that I got distracted by Mr. Burke's awesome fedora, and some... Hot chick who likes nuka cola a little too much... The Dunwich building etc, etc...

In my continued wanderings of the Capital Wasteland, I come upon this old auto garage, or whatever. And in the basement was the entrance to a Vault 112... It seems that I've barely started my search for my dad, and BOOM! There he is. Right in front of me. How convenient.

Now suddenly, my character has mysteriously heard of something called Project Purity, and somehow knows about somebody named Dr. Li, and my dad is assuming I've been to something called Rivet City. Well, I hadn't been to this Rivet City, so I couldn't fast travel there... I went the whole way on foot, with my dad. And let me tell you, this man has BALLS. He's an idiot, but he has BALLS.

If there was any sort of mild threat within the 100 feet of us, he would drop everything he was doing, and (in a calm voice) do his damnedest to rock the living shit out of whatever it was. He promptly used all the ammo in his pistol on a bloatfly, and as soon as we ran into a sentry bot that shot him with lasers, he ran straight up to it so he could PUNCH THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF IT. He then did the same with TWO GIANT RADSCORPIONS.

He demonstrated to me what a pussy I am for using weapons, and proved in just five minutes that I could never live up to his epic awesomeness. But of course, he didn't stop there...

Now, Smith Casey's Auto Garage and Rivet City are on two different sides of the map, something which wasn't clear to me at the time... Which means that eventually we stumbled upon some raiders. As we were fighting them... (Me with a Chinese Assault Rifle, and my dad with his BARE FUCKING HANDS...), I hear some explosions just over a hill, right? So I think "Somebody just shot a pile of cars, or there's a ton of mines or something..." But no.
It soon became clear that it was a RAIDER WITH A MISSILE LAUNCHER.

At this point, my dad has beaten the shit out of one raider, and taken his knife (Hey, at least he isn't using his fists, right?). He charges the raider with the missile launcher, takes SEVERAL FUCKING MISSILES TO THE FACE, and proceeds to stab the shit out of her. The raider, who had the missile launcher, ran away. From my dad. Who had a knife. I don't blame her, though. Since he's fucking IMMORTAL.

I discovered this when he had the brilliant plan of taking on a super mutant brute who had a minigun. Now, keep in mind. My dad was still using a stabber, right. I didn't realize he could only be knocked unconcious until this happened, so it scared the shit out of me. I was going at the mutant with my assault rifle, my custom dartgun, this Terrible Shotgun I found, and all the other shit in my inventory so he wouldn't hurt my dad.

So when he manages to knock him unconcious, he turns his focus to ME. I'm about wetting myself at this point, right? So I'm backing up behind cover, still throwing everything I have at him, then my dad comes up FROM BEHIND HIM. WITH HIS KNIFE. CRITICAL HIT. When he finally kills the super mutant, he just keeps walking like nothing had happened.

Anyway, those were the most eventful parts of the story. We did run into a gang of super mutants further down the road, but they mostly had hunting rifles, so I sat on the sidelines. Watching my dad slowly carving up super mutants with his knife.

Huge balls. You don't fuck around with a guy that hardcore, man. Although, it was kinda funny when I realized he couldn't die.

Aherm, so we get to Rivet City, and keep in mind, this is my first time visiting, so I hadn't extended the drawbridge yet. My dad goes up to where the bridge should be, and I followed him right up there.

AND HE TURNS AROUND AND GOES BACK TO GROUND LEVEL. I'm like "What the fuck, dad?" And he's just like "DURRRR, IT'S THIS WAY HONEY! THROUGH THE RADIO ACTIVE WATER!" So I'm like, "God damn it, I don't know why I'm following this retard, but he better have a good sense of direction."

So I swim after him in this toxic water, and he just STOPS right in front of the wall. I decided it's best to get the hell out of there before I grow a mutated toe or something. So I head back up to the bridge, and I learn how to extend it...

... Yeah, I had to start over right there. He never did get up.
 

ArcWinter

New member
May 9, 2009
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haha. Amusing. Nonsensical, and rambling, wouldn't get a good grade in an English class, but it's funny.
 

Handofpwn

New member
Aug 6, 2008
655
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I lol'd? But yeah, i didnt have quite that experience... I followed the story line. although i know that you could skip massive parts of it.
 

AkJay

New member
Feb 22, 2009
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Would have bee funnier if there were less bold capital letters.
 

lacktheknack

Je suis joined jewels.
Jan 19, 2009
19,316
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I try to finish all the side quests ON THE WAY to my main story goal for this very reason.
 

timmytom1

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Feb 26, 2009
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NATO.Caliber said:
I still remember the first time I played this game.

Once I got out of Vault 101, I went to Megaton, the nearby city, to ask about my dad, and Colin Moriarty told me to find the Galaxy News Radio station.

Anyway, after that I got distracted by Mr. Burke's awesome fedora, and some... Hot chick who likes nuka cola a little too much... The Dunwich building etc, etc...

In my continued wanderings of the Capital Wasteland, I come upon this old auto garage, or whatever. And in the basement was the entrance to a Vault 112... It seems that I've barely started my search for my dad, and BOOM! There he is. Right in front of me. How convenient.

Now suddenly, my character has mysteriously heard of something called Project Purity, and somehow knows about somebody named Dr. Li, and my dad is assuming I've been to something called Rivet City. Well, I hadn't been to this Rivet City, so I couldn't fast travel there... I went the whole way on foot, with my dad. And let me tell you, this man has BALLS. He's an idiot, but he has BALLS.

If there was any sort of mild threat within the 100 feet of us, he would drop everything he was doing, and (in a calm voice) do his damnedest to rock the living shit out of whatever it was. He promptly used all the ammo in his pistol on a bloatfly, and as soon as we ran into a sentry bot that shot him with lasers, he ran straight up to it so he could PUNCH THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF IT. He then did the same with TWO GIANT RADSCORPIONS.

He demonstrated to me what a pussy I am for using weapons, and proved in just five minutes that I could never live up to his epic awesomeness. But of course, he didn't stop there...

Now, Smith Casey's Auto Garage and Rivet City are on two different sides of the map, something which wasn't clear to me at the time... Which means that eventually we stumbled upon some raiders. As we were fighting them... (Me with a Chinese Assault Rifle, and my dad with his BARE FUCKING HANDS...), I hear some explosions just over a hill, right? So I think "Somebody just shot a pile of cars, or there's a ton of mines or something..." But no.
It soon became clear that it was a RAIDER WITH A MISSILE LAUNCHER.

At this point, my dad has beaten the shit out of one raider, and taken his knife (Hey, at least he isn't using his fists, right?). He charges the raider with the missile launcher, takes SEVERAL FUCKING MISSILES TO THE FACE, and proceeds to stab the shit out of her. The raider, who had the missile launcher, ran away. From my dad. Who had a knife. I don't blame her, though. Since he's fucking IMMORTAL.

I discovered this when he had the brilliant plan of taking on a super mutant brute who had a minigun. Now, keep in mind. My dad was still using a stabber, right. I didn't realize he could only be knocked unconcious until this happened, so it scared the shit out of me. I was going at the mutant with my assault rifle, my custom dartgun, this Terrible Shotgun I found, and all the other shit in my inventory so he wouldn't hurt my dad.

So when he manages to knock him unconcious, he turns his focus to ME. I'm about wetting myself at this point, right? So I'm backing up behind cover, still throwing everything I have at him, then my dad comes up FROM BEHIND HIM. WITH HIS KNIFE. CRITICAL HIT. When he finally kills the super mutant, he just keeps walking like nothing had happened.

Anyway, those were the most eventful parts of the story. We did run into a gang of super mutants further down the road, but they mostly had hunting rifles, so I sat on the sidelines. Watching my dad slowly carving up super mutants with his knife.

Huge balls. You don't fuck around with a guy that hardcore, man. Although, it was kinda funny when I realized he couldn't die.

Aherm, so we get to Rivet City, and keep in mind, this is my first time visiting, so I hadn't extended the drawbridge yet. My dad goes up to where the bridge should be, and I followed him right up there.

AND HE TURNS AROUND AND GOES BACK TO GROUND LEVEL. I'm like "What the fuck, dad?" And he's just like "DURRRR, IT'S THIS WAY HONEY! THROUGH THE RADIO ACTIVE WATER!" So I'm like, "God damn it, I don't know why I'm following this retard, but he better have a good sense of direction."

So I swim after him in this toxic water, and he just STOPS right in front of the wall. I decided it's best to get the hell out of there before I grow a mutated toe or something. So I head back up to the bridge, and I learn how to extend it...

... Yeah, I had to start over right there. He never did get up.
I had a similar experience with martin (voiced by Sean Bean) in oblivion who took on anything and everything ,including (because rather than go to my objective i took a very long detour )a GIANT MUDCRAB!!!!
 

TheXRatedDodo

New member
Jan 7, 2009
445
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And it's stories like this that make us realise that while Fallout 3 is fun, it really doesn't hold a candle to the originals.

Cool story though bro, I have to admit, you got some laughs out of me. I love shit written like this, always makes me giggle. Like that facebook quiz "WHICH BADASS MONSTER ARE YOU?" with answers like
"YOURE A FUCKING PIECE OF TOAST!
HOLY SHIT YOU ARE SO FUCKING BUTTERY AND DELICIOUS. PEOPLE JUST WANT TO FUCKING EAT YOU COS YOU TASTE SO GODDAMN GOOD, FUCK YEAH"
haha.
its good stuff.
 

manbeartim

New member
Jul 7, 2009
11
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Lost In The Void said:
Wow makes me regret fast traveling very epic post.
This. Also thanks for the warning, I don't like starting over because of glitches. Hilarious post.