Parents anti-gaming, nothing else to do really..

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mrvenom

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Jan 3, 2010
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Hey, got a small problem here..

My dad's ok with me gaming.. he doesn't mind. My mother however...
My mother works with addicted youngsters and therefor thinks she knows when someone is addicted to gaming. And according to her, i'm addicted.

I myself love to game (rpg fan) and follow the news closely (diablo 3 ftw!) . My school things go well, social life is a bit meh (2 best friends are huge game-geeks with 5 hours of gaming everyday) but that's ok. I know that i am not addicted, because i only want to play a game for 1 hour straight, before wanting to do something else, like watching tv, reading a book or trolling people online. It does not control my life.

I have had serious arguments with my mother about this. The situation is pretty tense, so tense in fact i don't want to be in the same room as here. My mother keeps comparing me with my little sister, who wants a psych degree and therefor has to do a lot of work. I on the other hand am learning to become a web designer, and don't have to nearly as much work. My mother doesn't like the fact that i can afford to be a bit lazy.

I have had a anti-gaming period already, in which i locked up my games and console. The arguments with my mother led to me associating gaming with fights, and a bad feeling. (i think pavlov or something, a leads to b, b leads to c, ergo a leads to c)

But that didn't work either, because my mother said i had stopped gaming for the wrong reasons or something like that -.-' She didn't understand why i had stopped gaming.


Is there anything i can do to stop the fighting?
 

similar.squirrel

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Mar 28, 2009
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Does she watch television or read books? Why don't you tell her that she's addicted, and let the absurdity of her argument sink in. That is, if you really do only play games for hour-long stints.
 

Zantos

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Jan 5, 2011
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Claim it as a hobby. Everyone has hobbies, things they sink time and money into for nought but their personal enjoyment. Bring it onto a level plain with her hobbies, surely she has something like that. I evaded an argument recently in this way:
Dad - "Joe, you just bought ANOTHER console!"
Me - "Dad, you've spent how many thousands on old cars and sailing in the past year?"
Dad - "Fair play."

At the end of the day she's bound to be sensible and rational, and although she may invoke the "I'm your parent and you will obey me" card at any point, a simple discussion on how you enjoy it, maybe with a bit on how it's relevant to web design (aesthetics mostly) and I'm sure she'll see your side of things.
 

RootbeerJello

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Jul 19, 2009
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Captain Placeholder said:
Tell her to shut the fuck up and get over it.

In all reality - Tell her why you love to game - show her that gaming is a hobby, that it isn't a mental addiction. Tell her that she is a *****. Do whatever.

Personally she sounds like an uptight ***** who needs a dose of reality.

Or, depending on how old your sister is, buy a dildo and shove it under her matress. Pretend to 'find it' and then tell your mother. She will be pissed and when she is pissed with you, you can bring up the 'Well my sister had a fucking dildo under her bed!' Which should save you the time.

Plus its just plan fucking funny XD
This man. Is a genius.

But seriously, I'd be surprised if you manage to get through to her. And DO NOT mention how games can train you for real life things as mentioned above. Your mom sounds like she could turn that around into video games=murder trainers.
 

mrvenom

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Jan 3, 2010
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RAKtheUndead said:
Explain to her the significance of serious gaming, where simulations are used to improve real-world skills. This is particularly notable in the fields of motorsport and flight training, but also applies to military fields, disaster response skills, et cetera. This will hopefully give you a bit of support for your argument.
I've done that. She didn't get it.

similar.squirrel said:
Does she watch television or read books? Why don't you tell her that she's addicted, and let the absurdity of her argument sink in. That is, if you really do only play games for hour-long stints.
Well 1 to 1.5 hour-long sessions. Max. I got a shitty wireless connection anyway so MP is out of the question. And that i've tried also. Didn't work either.
 

Cheesus333

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Aug 20, 2008
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mrvenom said:
(diablo 3 ftw!)
Woo!

OT: I'm really not sure if there's any way you can change her mind on the subject. If someone is rational, they can be persuaded. If someone is irrational, they won't listen to reason, and therefore cannot. It sounds like your mother's stance on gaming is firmly in the latter.

So, until you move out (and by the sound of your progress in the educational system, I imagine that will be fairly soon) you'll have to bear not playing games as much in the house, and see if you can get your fix[footnote]Totally did that on purpose, but I'm just kidding[/footnote] elsewhere.
 

Neo10101

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Sep 7, 2009
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You gotta explain to her how you are not your sister and that you don't want to/need to get a huge college degree and that you want to enjoy life and relax a little and that not every waking minute is for studying for some degree and that you really want her to want that too and that its hurts you to see her try and run your life.
 

MaxwellEdison

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Sep 30, 2010
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Turn into one of those games-are-art people like me and explain to her that entertainment has inherent value, and isn't something one can be realistically "addicted" to. Be sure to point out the fact that, if she is a human being, she most likely takes in *far more* than an hour's worth of entertainment a day, most of that probably being pretty pointless.

Does she, by chance, read those horrid women's magazines? That would drive the point home nicely.
 

Eusebius

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Jun 13, 2011
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Zantos said:
Claim it as a hobby. Everyone has hobbies, things they sink time and money into for nought but their personal enjoyment. Bring it onto a level plain with her hobbies, surely she has something like that. I evaded an argument recently in this way:
Dad - "Joe, you just bought ANOTHER console!"
Me - "Dad, you've spent how many thousands on old cars and sailing in the past year?"
Dad - "Fair play."
This sounds like the best way to respond to her, and the least likely to worsen the situation. If you react immaturely by being insulting to her or by disrespecting her hobbies, not only is it not going to win her over, but you're creating more of a fight. You have to live with your mom, she has a certain amount of control over what you do, and you likely care about not straining your relationship with her as she is your mother. Stay calm, stay respectful.