Poll: Am I allowed to be jealous?

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SovietSecrets

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Nov 16, 2008
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Since its open I am not exactly sure why you are jealous unless you like the guy or don't want him banging anyone else that you know.
 

SnipErlite

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Aug 16, 2009
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You're allowed to be, since it's a natural human emotion. Although it could be argued that it would be unfair to complain about such jealousy to him, for example, since you are friends with benefits i.e. without real commitment.

toriver said:
Really, I don't understand the whole "friends with benefits" thing. Why would you have (consensual) sex with each other if there were no feelings beyond friendship involved?
People enjoy sex - this means they can have sex with anyone they find attractive, on top of fairly regular sex with the friend.
 

Plurralbles

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Jan 12, 2010
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I hav ea friend exactly like that guy. You volunteered fr this shit though so it's all your fault. Either get over it or realize that perhaps this lifestyle isn't for you. Jealousy is part of hte human condition, perfectly natural.
 

Vorlayn

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Jun 3, 2010
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Of course you're allowed to feel stuff, it's your body and you're allowed to feel with it whatever you want. Acting on it might be a bad idea though, exclusivity isn't implied in fwb.

On a related issue, fwb should be more accepted. I mean, if people don't want to do fwb, they're free to not do it.
 

TheDrunkNinja

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Jun 12, 2009
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Sorry, sweetheart. Jealously = more than friends. If you were just friends, I doubt you would mind as much as you do.

I think of the movie Juno when it comes to this type of situation minus the pregnancy.
 

-Samurai-

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Oct 8, 2009
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Crystalite said:
As far as I can tell, situations like these will always get someone hurt. There is no such thing as regular sex without a relationship, no matter how hard you try to deny it.
I must be the exception to this. I had a "friend with benefits" all throughout highschool, and for about 3 years after. Then she found a boyfriend, and we stopped having sex, but we still talk to each other every day and hang out on a regular basis.

Neither of us got hurt, and I trust her when she says she never had those kinds of feelings for me.

OT: I'd say it's fine to be jealous. However, you may want to be a little cautions. You don't want to catch something those other pies may have.
 

RottingAwesome

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Aug 15, 2009
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well it seems like you might have stronger feelings for this guy than you though :)
maybe you should take things to the next level
 

Ben Legend

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Apr 16, 2009
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Yay, sleeping around, lets bring all the STD's to the party! Sarcasm aside, if he is 'dipping his rod in other ponds' then just make sure he's being safe.

But on topic, why are you not in a relationship with him if you both obviously have feelings for each other, (enough to sleep together) and share hobbies and do what ordinary couples do?
 

Angryman101

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Aug 7, 2009
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Probably a 'grass is always greener' kind of thing. She's getting him when you're not, so you want him for yourself, but once that happens you won't be happy. The feeling will pass over time, just deal with it for a little while.
 

Ham_authority95

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Dec 8, 2009
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Supernatural Girl said:
So me and this guy are friends with benefits. We aren't seeing each other or dating, agreeing instead to keeping our options open, but we happen to have sex fairly frequently when hanging out together (this is usually cuddling up watching DVD's) and we are good friends, sharing a few hobbies.

So, I discover he's got his penis in a few other pies, which I'm not really bothered about. But one of the girls is someone I know. Now there is a face to this abstract concept of keeping our options open.

I think I am a little bit jealous of her, but I don't know why. So, I'm wondering what you guys think. Am I allowed to be jealous? And can you suggest any reason why I might be jealous? I've a couple of thoughts, but I'd like to know what you think. : )
You're always allowed to be jealous, but its not always justified.

In my humble opinion, because you two are just friends with benefits and not in a serious relationship, he can pretty much bone whoever else he wants.

Just try not to let it get to you.

And on another note: Be VERY careful about STDs since his salami is now in other persons sandwich.
[small]sorry for the retarded analogy[/small]
 

Eggsnham

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Apr 29, 2009
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I wouldn't know since I try to keep relationships fairly personal so things like this don't happen often, but I'd say that given the circumstances, you shouldn't be jealous, as you and this guy seem to agree that the relationship is mostly based around casual sex.

Now if he were your boyfriend, that's a different story completely.
 

Kif

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Jun 2, 2009
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You are allowed to be jealous, in fact... I respect you more for being jealous than if you were not jealous... however, you have put yourself in this situation and the prospect must have occured to you before entering into such an agreement.

Maybe, if you do have feelings for him you may want to consider exclusivity... but personally if I had a casual relationship with a girl who was sleeping around with various other people, well, I'd stop sleeping with her as I'm a goody two shoes and very sensible but in the context of the thread I'd keep it casual.

Also, use protection kids...
 

Karlaxx

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Oct 26, 2009
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We're 'allowed' to feel anything- it's whether or not we act on those feelings that determines anything. I think you have a solid enough grasp on reality to keep it in check.
 

cicaba

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Feb 28, 2009
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You shouldn't feel guilty about being jealous even though you know what kind of relationship you are in.

Are you happier in this situation and being jealous than leaving him? (Sorry if I sound like I'm simplifying it too much)

Good luck with all this.
 

caprisun

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Nov 8, 2009
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Supernatural Girl said:
I think I am a little bit jealous of her, but I don't know why. So, I'm wondering what you guys think. Am I allowed to be jealous? And can you suggest any reason why I might be jealous? I've a couple of thoughts, but I'd like to know what you think. : )
Sounds to me like you want a bit more with this guy, and tbh actually sounds like a bit more that your admitting to yourself. Like if ye both curl up and watch films together, thats a pretty couply thing to do, not something ppl who are just in it for the sex would do.

And if thats true then of course your allowed to be jelous, but that aint enough. I think you gotta have a chat with this guy and see what he things(even if you just skirt around the issue to start with), caus i dont think your bein fair to yourself if you go on just being one of many girls in this chaps like if you have feelings for him, which it really sounds like you do.