Now, someone please check me on this, but true, absolute anarchy is kinda impossible, isn't it?
The very slightest, tiniest bit of enforcement against the rampant crime of any kinda - even one guy protecting his friend from a home invasion - is a form of police. Also, when there's so-called anarchy, gangs tend to form. Gangs have some kind of government/leadership, however rudimentary.
Oh yeah, you also need some kind of governing to feed everyone, unless we're going to go back to Amish-like agriculture. That's one part we never see in post-apocalyptic scenarios: How does everyone get food? Do those hardcore biker gangs really farm crops in, I don't know, the back yards in the suburbs? Do they raise animals specifically for meat, or would they have to eventually resort to catching stray animals?
Absolute totalitarianism is more likely than absolute anarchy, but only slightly.
Absolute totalitarianism implies that everything is being controlled by the one person. Oh, that person might be allowed some advisers, but it all comes down to the one. I find this unlikely for two reasons:
1) There's always going to be a handful of qualities of daily life that can't be fully regulated for any number of reasons.
2) Even if the ruler makes every tiny decision for the society being governed, there are many factors that influence said decisions. Therefore, even though the ruler makes the decisions, they're not entirely from the ruler's reasoning. In other words.
But, hey, I guess I'm over-analyzing this. Absolute anarchy/totalitarianism falls into the same category as zero and infinity: They're concepts that are simple to understand, but impossible as reality.
And, with all that said, I'll say... I'd prefer the pseudo-anarchy, because I know I have the resources to defend what I hold dear, with a little help from my friends. Oh, I think I'd go bat-squeak insane after the first week, trying to keep vigilant against invasion, but I'm hopeful I can have enough back-up to make it through the worst of the chaos. After all, as much as people like to loot and pillage, I would think they can only do that for a week or two before it gets boring.