Poll: Are you happy?
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I'm surrounded by people who are motivated to do what I do, I'm in school and not wasting away my time in a low paying retail job, I can come to a basement that's all to myself so I can indulge in my favorite hobby of gaming without interruptions and I have milk. I am very content.
I can afford my food, I can pay the bills, I can ride my motorcycle, and support a gaming and LARP hobby. And I work at a place that is relatively close to what I was hoping could do. I get along very well with my brother and mother, have few but good friends.
If I count my problems against that I'd say that yes, I am happy.
If I count my problems against that I'd say that yes, I am happy.
Nice words, but not terribly meaningful. To me, anyway. Sometimes the small things aren't enough, or aren't relevant, or maybe they're not even there. Life isn't just about what happens to you, I agree, it's how you react and deal with it. Anyway, I guess you kinda have a point. Count your blessings and all that jazz.SimpleThunda said:
I suppose you could call it happiness. I just got out of a 5 year marriage. I cared for her, but our personalities, interests and values clashed so much that we were both fairly miserable together. I suppose relief might describe the state I'm in better? I don't get to see my daughter as often, but I do spend time with her at least once a week. I'm constantly broke, but money problems never really stressed me out anyway. I've made a couple of friends since the split, so I'm not excessively lonely(and I'm not uncomfortable with solitude in the first place). Overall, I have no complaints.
Then again, the forum seems to disagree with me since I had to click "yes" three times before it would take.
Then again, the forum seems to disagree with me since I had to click "yes" three times before it would take.
Fight it all you'd like but if the hamsters powering the Escapist tell you that you are not happy, then you are not happy. Do not fear the wisdom of the Hamsters for they are all powerful and loving in their own furry wayScars Unseen said:
I'm not living paycheck to paycheck. I've got a roof over my head and am not hungry. I have a goal I'm working towards that is actually 3 1/2 months away from completion. I'm losing weight rapidly and am getting closer to a healthy weight. I don't have a significant other in my life, but that's by choice, not from lack of success.
I'm the happiest I've been in a while.
I'm the happiest I've been in a while.
No, I'm not happy. I owe over $10,000 in student loans from taking 3 college programs that I can't even use. I work 2 jobs which gives me just enough money to get by. My relationship prospects are non-existant and I'm 32 years old. The only thing I do have going for me is a loving and supportive family.
Mostly yes - all in all I have it good. A lotta stuff will be changing in the next couple of years though and I'm not exactly sure in what ways. I'll need to make major decisions and for the first time... ever really I'm not sure which way to go. So I'm not happy or sad - just confused I guess
From an emotional standpoint, my usual state is not really what I would call happy. There is just an all pervading cynicism that drags me down to a fairly empty feeling neutral state, not really happy or unhappy. I recall as a child years ago that I had the capability to feel excitement, which I think really made a general happiness far more attainable. After a period of what I can only assume was some form of depression (never diagnosed or anything, so I don't like to claim something that might not be true) as a teenager, where happiness was very much absent, it has been very rare to be excited about anything in my life. Events just happen and I watch them go by, disappointed by their lack of impact on me. Compared to my lowest point of 'depression' I am far happier now. A general feeling of muted emotion is far superior to the crushing void of emptiness, punctuated by occasional misery.
That said, I am reasonably satisfied with my life at the moment. I've finished university and am now working as a programmer for games (pretty much my dream job and I recently got a permanent contract rather than the temporary one I was initially hired on to), though the company is very small at the moment, so the pay is low (but the work is fun, so I can't complain, plus literally no one I've sent a job interview has ever actually replied, so it is as good a job as any until something better comes up). My overall quality of life is pretty good and I have plenty to keep myself entertained. I don't really have many friends, and those I do have I very rarely see these days, which isn't too bad as I'm decidedly not a social person and I am quite content to keep myself company most of the time. The only thing stopping me from being at a positive base level of happiness is probably my own brain chemistry.
That said, I am reasonably satisfied with my life at the moment. I've finished university and am now working as a programmer for games (pretty much my dream job and I recently got a permanent contract rather than the temporary one I was initially hired on to), though the company is very small at the moment, so the pay is low (but the work is fun, so I can't complain, plus literally no one I've sent a job interview has ever actually replied, so it is as good a job as any until something better comes up). My overall quality of life is pretty good and I have plenty to keep myself entertained. I don't really have many friends, and those I do have I very rarely see these days, which isn't too bad as I'm decidedly not a social person and I am quite content to keep myself company most of the time. The only thing stopping me from being at a positive base level of happiness is probably my own brain chemistry.
I used to think I had it rough, and we all do have our own personal hell at some point. The trick to happiness isn't how much money you have in the bank or if you have a significant other, its first being happy with who you are. The next step is finding things in the world you love, and things you love to do and to do them. Don't sweat the small shit. I know I make it sound easy, and really its not. It takes hard work to be happy. As it is I am broke and unemployed except for odds and ends jobs which pay the bills barely. But despite that I still am happy with my life. I can't afford to let things in the world get me down, let adversity make my life worse.
An old boss of mine had a saying "Had a bad day once. I didn't like it, never did it again." Great words to live by. Basically means you can always make a crap day better you just have to find a way to do it. Like I said hard work. Work at being happy, it doesn't just happen. And also don't set unrealistic benchmarks for happiness. Little things are the true key to being happy. So there's my two cents. You don't like it I've got a crack team of Henchgoats available to show you true unhappiness.
An old boss of mine had a saying "Had a bad day once. I didn't like it, never did it again." Great words to live by. Basically means you can always make a crap day better you just have to find a way to do it. Like I said hard work. Work at being happy, it doesn't just happen. And also don't set unrealistic benchmarks for happiness. Little things are the true key to being happy. So there's my two cents. You don't like it I've got a crack team of Henchgoats available to show you true unhappiness.
I've got a family I love, a girlfriend I love and live with and very good and awesome friends. And I'm unhappy.
I have a lot of happy moments, but whenever I stop to think about it, or whenever I'm not distracted by some kind of entertainment, I'm usually pretty miserable. Not sure why, but I'd really like to be nonexistent instead.
I have a lot of happy moments, but whenever I stop to think about it, or whenever I'm not distracted by some kind of entertainment, I'm usually pretty miserable. Not sure why, but I'd really like to be nonexistent instead.
Being a cynic, you would think that happiness is beyond me. You'd be wrong. Because, you see, being a cynic just means that I think bad things are likely to happen because it realistically seems so. I've no illusions about some things in life. So, when I believe the pattern of something will lead to disaster and I'm WRONG...I'm quite pleased. I'm not the sort of guy whose ego is such that I can't stand being mistaken. Now, I'm not always wrong, but I AM happy because I lead a good life.
I was in the exact same position last year. It gets better.SirBryghtside said:Not really. I'm in a pretty bad place in my life where I'm working through a break-up that happened two months ago that kind of left me with what I think is clinical depression, zero friends, and a feeling like I'm going to have to do a complete overhaul of my life.
Things could be better
If you're at your lowest, you have nowhere to go but up. If you're not quite there yet, then things could be worse.
What helped me out was a combination of time and doing what I wanted.
I started 2013 miserable. It got worse for a while, and time all ran together. I started thinking about suicide again. But eventually I started to see myself as free, rather than alone. Nobody told me that the things I liked sucked. Nobody judged me for what I did, how I spent my time or money, or who/what I associated with. After being in a relationship and a few different social circles, it was great to just do whatever it was that I wanted to do.
I think the most important thing was just getting out and doing something, whatever came my way. I started saying "Yes" to things I hadn't done before, or things I used to pass on. I put more effort into household chores, exercise, and my job. I started listening to a larger variety of music, to see what things I liked. If a new acquaintance asked me to go do something with them, I'd go and do it even if I was unsure I'd enjoy it. I watched movies I'd seen before, trying to look at them in a new way. I watched a ton of new movies, and took a few chances on genres I don't usually watch. I got in touch with old friends, caught up with them, and even started hanging out with a few of them. I went back and re-discovered my love for all those things that were way too uncool, nerdy, or geeky that I'd lost along the way. I shaved my head, because I've always wanted to see what it looked like. I ordered one of these [http://25.media.tumblr.com/d93cfa8d00476a3e90b7777958aea5ad/tumblr_mya436KTHC1r1ficjo6_1280.jpg] from Volante Design [http://www.volantedesign.us/] for X-mas. Yeah, it'll look ridiculous when I wear it, but I don't care because I think it's awesome. It's what I want to wear, and nobody's going to get me down about that.
It was really difficult initially. I wanted to sit in bed all day. I wanted to brood. I didn't want her back, but I didn't want to be alone. I spent a lot of time thinking about how much the relationship sucked, how much the breakup sucked, and how much it sucked to be all by myself while she was off being happy with someone else. It was dark in my room, and I spent all my free time locked up in there; sleeping as much as possible. After a while, I knew that I needed to find something worth doing or end it entirely. That's exactly what I did. I went out and gave everything my best shot. I looked for movies, games, music, activities, and people that I liked. I thought a lot about how much I liked those things, and learned to be appreciative of the people I met without getting too attached. I found enough things worth doing for now. Then I set goals for the future, and I gave serious thought to my academic and career paths. If I were to live past right now, I'd definitely need things to keep living for down the road. I considered all the options I'd previously written off. At one point, I just sort of realized that my life was great. I realized that it had been great for a while, ever since I started getting out of my room. I noticed that it had been a while since I'd even thought about her, or what she'd say about something. I could look at people and characters that had similar visual qualities, and I wouldn't be reminded of her or project bits of her onto them. I was down a lot less often, and when I was there was always something to look forward to.
2014 is looking a hell of a lot better. I've lost 20 pounds, and I eat healthier. I've been exercising more often. My jacket arrives in March, which is the same month that the 300 sequel comes out. An old friend of mine asked me to go to a concert with him, I'm going to go in the hopes that I'll find some new music I like or maybe meet a pretty young lady. I'm really close to getting my degree, I'm looking forward to registering for my last few classes. Work is going well, I know all my coworkers a lot better since I agreed to go out with them. In terms of games, I found many new and old titles I love by playing things I'd normally write off. I suck at strategy games, but taking a chance on Planetary Annihilation has been wonderful. I bought Grimm on steam on a whim, and I'm really enjoying it. To top it all off, I got a text from my ex just yesterday. She's miserable, working a job she hates, having issues with the guy she dumped me for, and her entire family/social life is imploding. Her life is exactly the same as it was a year ago. I told her "That's nice, my life is AWESOME!" and went back to playing Warframe.
Things DO get better.
I'll be your friend.SirBryghtside said:Not really. I'm in a pretty bad place in my life where I'm working through a break-up that happened two months ago that kind of left me with what I think is clinical depression, zero friends, and a feeling like I'm going to have to do a complete overhaul of my life.
Things could be better
As for the question, I'm pretty happy. We all have challenges to face, and I'm no different. But I made a conscious decision to be as positive as I can muster and try to take things with a good attitude. It's been working out for a good long time now so I can't complain.