Poll: Do You Manspread

[Mahorfeus]

I would not go so far as to see keeping my legs closed is painful, but keeping them open is certainly more comfortable for me. Even when I do "spread," my knees only rarely go past my shoulders. I mean, after a certain point you're just tightening your pants against your groin, skinny jeans or not. If space is available, I don't see anything wrong with going for the full spread if that floats your boat. All of this with the caveat that you are aware of your surroundings and are considerate when unseated people are nearby.

On the other end, I think it's a lot more reasonable to ask someone that's spreading to make room than it is to take pictures of them and post it on the internet.

 

[SecondPrize]

Yeah, as others have said, it's not really a gendered thing. If you're taking up additional space on public transport, you're being rude, either it's because you have to have your legs at 180 degrees when sitting, because you're carrying a small shopping mall in baggage, or because you're fat enough you literally take up multiple seats.

So a fat person is being rude by existing? I think someone else might be being rude...

You know, I've seen a handicapped person with a motorized wheelchair cause a set of three seats to be folded up so they could park their wheelchair there. What a total dick, right? [/poeslaw]

additional
əˈdɪʃ(&#601n(&#601l/Submit
adjective
added, extra, or supplementary to what is already present or available.
"we require additional information"

That's the key word there, you seem to have missed it. With your examples, there is no addition, just the whole.

 

[Wrex Brogan]

...why are people complaining about comfort. It's not a case of comfort. It's a case of not being a prick and hogging the limited space on public transport. Yeah, seats on trains and buses (and planes) are small, cramped and uncomfortable. Suck it the fuck up and squish in, it's not going to kill you.

Nothing wrong with spreading out when there's space free (everyone does it, I've taken up 6 seats on empty trains just because I could), just don't be rude when the seats are needed.

But hey, why get to crux of the issue when people can take weak-handed jabs at feminism, that's really what it's all about, right?

It's worth noting, by the way, that s0denone was not arguing that it is necessary for some; he claimed it was a necessity for all, unless their "balls hadn't dropped". That's just absurdly, transparently false, as should be obvious from even cursory observation.

I refuse to believe it is preferrable to anyone to sit with their knees pressed together, if they have testicles or any kind of thighs. There is no way that can be preferrable. No way.

My primary focus was on the thighs, not the testes, but the point remains. Any big guy, muscular or fat, cannot sit like that without being wildly uncomfortable, while I suppose I can be inclined to believe a more "average" looking man can do so at less discomfort, while it still wouldn't be particularly awesome.

I suppose that makes this an issues of both "fat-" and "Fit shaming". Interesting, bud.

EDIT: I also think it is pretty hilarious that you talk as if testes are all the same size. You don't have to have testicular cancer to have big balls(within reason), friend.

...What if you're big, fat, have a generous helping of testicles and can still sit comfortably in a chair without flopping your legs out?

Just sayin', anecdotes are all well and good until we try to make arguments from 'em. Because then some fat, large-balled fuck (i.e. me) will come butting in going 'Your argument doesn't fit my personal experience!' and ruin everything with his ability to not knee other passengers and try to pass it off as 'I need the space for comfort'.

 

[mecegirl]

Manspreading is real it's just not something all men do. I've had the unfortunate luck to sit next to a few. It's just really dumb... like there are unspoken rules about public transit. Most folks keep to themselves, but these dudes? Like they just don't seem to care that there leg is pressed up against someone else without reason. It literally goes past their seat into yours. The ones that slouch while doing so are even worse. On one memorable occasion the bus was so full that folks were standing and the diver had to turn passengers away, dude still had his knee half way into my seat. And when I pushed back he dared to try and open his legs wider.

 

[NiPah]

Women most frequently do the same thing with their purses or shopping bags but as far as I know it isn't necessarily more comfortable for them to sit that way because they're not squishing their goods when sitting with legs crossed or together.

Oh c'mon dude, men totally do the bag thing too. It's not a case of men have to sit spread out because of their spacehopper balls and women viciously handbag all over the place. I think we can agree people of any gender are capable of being reasonable human beings and also space-wasting jerks.

I think it's the closest thing we have to another gendered insult to counter man-spreading, women-spreading doesn't really work so it plays off the stereotypical post mall shopping female image, both it and the man-spreading stereotype are equal in the insulting of the portrayed gender.

I think we can all agree with both genders being able to be space-wasting jerks, similarly I think we can all agree both genders can come up with equally insulting gendered stereotypes.

 

[The Eupho Guy_v1legacy]

I don't take public transport much any more, but when I did I generally sat with my ankles crossed with my bag tucked behind my feet so no, I didn't spread. If I did sit with my feet apart I kept them inline with my shoulders.

 

[Dreiko_v1legacy]

I generally cross my legs or sit indian style (both legs crossed) if the seating allows for it, everywhere. That's most comfortable.


What I don't understand is how spreading your legs such that you do not crush your flesh is a "thing" and how it is decided whether the leeway one gives himself is beyond what is necessary without being aware of his testicular fortitude. We don't have fatspreading (fat people sitting in a way that doesn't crush their massive thighs, taking too much space up from thin people) so should we not do so in this case. Anyone who doesn't get this needs to try sitting while placing her fist in their pants in the center of her thighs and try to find a way that allows her fist to not feel smashed between her legs without alloting enough space for it somehow.

 

[Something Amyss]

Jeezy Chreezy. I'd be concerned for a guy who can't close his legs without pain, that doesn't sound right to me.

Yeeeeeah, I've actually been kind of torn as to whether or not to talk about this. Partially because I'm not really fond of talking about my nether regions.

But, I mean, I guess here's the short version. Not only was I cursed with male genitals, but seemingly especially sensitive ones to the point I've been medically checked out to rule out any potentially harmful issues (cancer's the one I remember, because I've been screened for almost every cancer on the planet). I'm sensitive enough I have issues properly "tucking."

And I still don't have a problem either crossing my legs or simply sitting with my knees narrower than my shoulders. It's not even like your knees need to be locked together, either, just close enough that you're not adding to space consumption.

1/5 of the poll right now says they're men and manspreading is necesssary (21.7% say "yes I have to) and I'm just thinking "are you serious?" and maybe if they are serious, it's something that should be checked out because that honestly doesn't sound healthy.

And why do weird guys always have to bring up breastfeeding. Uuuugh.

I'm more concerned with the context. What are you doing with your genitals that equates to feeding another human being? Remember, this is a biological necessity

Good to see that they're typically sexist and reserve stroller complaints for women. As if only a woman could ever do that or as if it's something inherently female.

Worse, since CAFE claims to be concerned with paternal parental rights.

...god, try writing "paternal parental" when you're dyslexic. I'm glad I didn't have to include "prenatal" there.

Hell, even the breastfeeding argument comes off as pretty hollow coming from a group that claims to care about families. Seems like a "family" group wouldn't want to stop breastfeeding. Also, I'm not really sure how it's "equality" that dudes can walk around with their shirts off but the only time it's even questionable acceptable for a woman to expose herself is because she's feeding a human being.

It's kind of getting off the topic of the biological necessity to "manspread," but hey.

 

[Kameburger]

Sooooo, I have recently seen a rise in discussion (internet cesspooling and maybe one news story) about the supposed problem of manspreading creating a crisis (hyperbole) of seating availability on public transports. Whenever this topic is brought up I constantly see people claiming that it is physiologically impossible for a man to not spread his legs lest he either crush his junk or ride them up his thighs, causing them to create a bulge in his pants. Leaving him open to sexual harassment. I have seen this argument raised time and time again with almost no alteration. This makes me believe that it is a snowclone argument, possibly a quote from a popular blogger/podcaster.

Furthermore, I have heard that the term is sexist as it excludes female spreaders from the argument but, from my personal observations, the most vocal pro manspreaders base almost all of their arguments upon the male physiology necessitating it. Soooo, does that make it a sexist term, I do not know.

I am asking because there does not seem to actually be any decent studies upon this phenomenon (that I can find) and it all appears to be hearsay at this point. Is it even a problem at all? I know personally that if I wanted a seat on a full bus and someone was consuming more than one without any evident need, I would be very hesitant to bother them. As a man with, ahem, normal assets I was not able to cause myself any discomfort by closing my legs together. Nor was I able to create any noticeable differences in the crotch of my pants while wearing jeans.

At the same time I have freaking enormous thighs as a powerlifter so I do not how that factors in, if at all.

So let me know what you think, share any studies (if there are even any), and let me know of your own experiences. I have tried my best to be as neutral as possible but I just know that this is going to get ugly fast but my acknowledging it is not an invitation for such, far from it. For the love of God, at least try to be decent.

P.S. If popular consensus reads that the term is sexist, what term would you use instead of manspread? Would it be more prudent to simply use different terms for men and women?

I don't really understand the term as anything but a gendered term to express irritation. For example, explaining becomes "mansplaining" when a man does it to a woman in a certain way. Sitting becomes "manspreading" when you are perceived to take up someone else's space as a result of spreading your legs to an undefined degree. So I guess my interpretation of the word doesn't match your question exactly, if that makes sense.

Is the term sexist? I donno can we please just stop this? I don't want to dissect every breath as some sort of problematic societal hurdle. There are conversations in the field of social justice that have direct implications for the quality of life of the people involved. This is not one of them in my honest opinion...

 

[Elfgore]

All the time, I'm doing it right now. Then again, the only place I can do it is at work and home. I have my own cube so no issue with room there. It is just very comfortable.

Now, back when I rode the bus to school and I had to share a seat. I would reel it in. I would do the same if needed on a public bus/train.

 

[Something Amyss]

I refuse to believe it is preferrable to anyone to sit with their knees pressed together, if they have testicles or any kind of thighs. There is no way that can be preferrable. No way.

Admittedly, I've not read every post in the thread. Is anyone saying that you have to press your knees together to not take up extra space? All you really need to do is sit with your knees not further apart than your shoulders. There. You're no longer taking up extra space. And there's no need to press your knees together.

 

[Dreiko_v1legacy]

I refuse to believe it is preferrable to anyone to sit with their knees pressed together, if they have testicles or any kind of thighs. There is no way that can be preferrable. No way.

Admittedly, I've not read every post in the thread. Is anyone saying that you have to press your knees together to not take up extra space? All you really need to do is sit with your knees not further apart than your shoulders. There. You're no longer taking up extra space. And there's no need to press your knees together.

The problem is that there is no standard. What you describe is reasonable but a lot of people don't specify this and use an "I know it when I see it" approach to condemning people. It's purely subjective and nonsense. You can both spread your legs enough to not crush your balls and not take up space outside your seat and that is also a literal application of the term manspreading. Also, women are able to sit in ways that take up more than one seat, too! If you wanna talk about public transportation etiquette you need not gender it or overly focus on this one example of bad manners.

 

[Wolf Hagen]

I am already such a fat bastard, that I make up for 1,5 Persons, so got no need to "spread out".

Neither probably if I'd be a skinny dude type though. It's rude behaviour.

 

[Recusant]

I'm surprised that I, someone who had no idea what this thing was before I clicked on the thread, have to explain it, but such is the world that we live in. Now, anyone referring to a specific type- not a specific set, mind, but a type of genitals as "junk" is either making a bad joke or pushing a toxic ideology. Since this is being referred to as "manspreading" it's pretty obvious which is the case here, but this behavior does exist (though more commonly on trains), it is mostly men doing it, and it is for anatomical reasons- just ones further north than people seem to think.

I am a very large man- I am tall, I am broad, and I am fat. As happens when you are large in all three dimensions and live on a ludicrously iron-rich planet, I am also very heavy. I am not, however, so large that I get to ignore inertia. If you're the poor fool sitting in front of me when the train we're on decelerates quickly from a speed far faster than I ever evolved to move, my high center of gravity is going to cause me to slam into you, with results that are painful at best. The risk can be greatly ameliorated if I'm able to prop my legs out as stabilizers to triple my available balance points- but if, as is usually the case on US public transit trains, we're both sitting sideways relative to the direction of travel, I need to spread them out further. This is the root of most of what you're going to see. Yes, there are people who will simply sprawl to fill all available space; I'm not disputing that some people have no consideration for others. But it's a lot less rude to risk exposing someone to momentary discomfort than risk crippling them by slamming the weight of a gorilla into a body that's tensing to avoid slipping itself.

 

[Kirke]

I do, though not as much when using public transportation. But not because the crown jewels get uncomfortable, but because I have big thighs. I have to strain in order to keep my knees within shoulder width. Fortunately for everyone involved, I mostly use a bicycle.

 

[Katherine Kerensky]

Sounds like a bit of a stupid term to excuse being an asshole

Feminists who insist that all men must cross their legs and make themselves invisible think so yes.

All normal people by contrast realise that this is not obligatory and people can sit on their seat as they like, without being blamed for existing.

Did I say "all men must cross their legs and make themselves invisible"?
No, I did not. Nor did I ever say I am a feminist.
So, feel free to take your sort of posting to R&P or GID, where it belongs.

 

[Katherine Kerensky]

Did I say "all men must cross their legs and make themselves invisible"?

You said manspreading equals being an arsehole.
Manspreading is a feminist term for the offense of sitting normally.

Try reading my original post rather than just quoting a small part of it. I gave some very specific examples.
I know it may be the norm to use small parts of a post to try to twist what people say in R&P, but not here. No need to poison the rest of the forums with such practices.

 

[Bat Vader]

People should sit how and where they want. If others find it rude or offensive they can fuck right off. I sit how and where and I want and I couldn't care any less what others think.