Poll: Do you think spanking is wrong?

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Betancore

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katsumoto03 said:
Grathius22 said:
katsumoto03 said:
It's really just stupid. There are so many better ways to teach/discipline your kid.
Like?
Well, telling them why what they're doing is wrong. Unless the child is an asshole they should stop, in theory.
Agreed. Sure, pain might mean that they'll associate doing something wrong with getting spanked, but it doesn't mean they understand why what they're doing is wrong. It sure as hell never worked for me.
 

CheeseSandwichCake

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When I was younger my mother used to beat the living shit out of me when I stepped out of line. I think I turned out okay.

I support hitting children if it's for discipline, not if you just hit your children because you're angry or something. At least they know they did something actually wrong in order to get smacked.
 

Mighty the Moose

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Darkman94 said:
Housebroken Lunatic said:
Tell me, if it's just a "light smack to the bottom" that doesn't hurt or injure, you mean to tell me that it's no really about inflicting pain?

Because if that's what you're saying, you will inevitably have to concede to the fact that you yourself believe that children can respond to other types of communication than the infliction of pain. Naturally this begs the question that if it isn't about inflicting pain, then why couldn't you use a less barbaric and civlized way of communicating your idea to the child?
This is an example of a fallacy of Composition...
Or more accurately, and as Housebroken perhaps deliberately notes, it is an example of the fallacy of Begging the Question. A better example of the fallacy of Composition would be something like:

I was spanked as a kid and turned out great. Therefore people who were spanked like I was have probably turned out, as a group, better than those who weren't.

Interestingly, many posters in this thread have made, implicitly or otherwise, this very claim.
 

Jewrean

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No, sometimes it just needs to be done.

Have a look at the world around you. Pushy arrogant kids and teenagers that smoke, do drugs, and have sex early (like 10-12 years old), teens getting pregnant SUPER early, a general lack of respect for anyone but themselves and a severe lack of discipline. It didn't used to be like this. Yes there was a golden age when children FEARED the adults and as a result learned respect VERY quickly. The reason the world is now a shit hole is because of the PC Police (politically correct) that fight for minority groups and punish the majority whenever possible. It is because of this reason that we have seen a spiraling decay of ignorance, laziness, and poor upbringing from our children into parents back intro children again. The cycle will continue and the human race (at least Westerners) will continue to get stupider and stupider. Unless something radical is changed then we can all circle the cesspool of a drain we call life together. This is one of the core reasons why China will consume America and all Western society.

Furburt said:
Only in the last of last resorts, and preferably never. I was never spanked as a child. I think the best way to punish a child is not pain, but shame in what they've done. Worked for me.
Shame doesn't always work. Eventually the kids (especially the rebellious ones) really don't care what their parents think. Smacking early on is reasonable. Smacking into teens is a bit much. By then the kid is either going to be a fuck-wit waste of space or a suitable member of society. Smacking a fuck-wit only prolongs the inevitable.

Those that think 'violence is never the answer':

a) You've never had kids.
b) Your close-minded. You aren't necessarily a bad parent, but keep in mind what works for your family is different to others. Get off your high horse and jump back down into the real world where things are shit. Deal with it.
 

Hawgh

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Jewrean said:
No, sometimes it just needs to be done.

Have a look at the world around you. Pushy arrogant kids and teenagers that smoke, do drugs, and have sex early (like 10-12 years old), teens getting pregnant SUPER early, a general lack of respect for anyone but themselves and a severe lack of discipline. It didn't used to be like this. Yes there was a golden age when children FEARED the adults and as a result learned respect VERY quickly. The reason the world is now a shit hole is because of the PC Police (politically correct) that fight for minority groups and punish the majority whenever possible. It is because of this reason that we have seen a spiraling decay of ignorance, laziness, and poor upbringing from our children into parents back intro children again. The cycle will continue and the human race (at least Westerners) will continue to get stupider and stupider. Unless something radical is changed then we can all circle the cesspool of a drain we call life together. This is one of the core reasons why China will consume America and all Western society.

Furburt said:
Only in the last of last resorts, and preferably never. I was never spanked as a child. I think the best way to punish a child is not pain, but shame in what they've done. Worked for me.
Shame doesn't always work. Eventually the kids (especially the rebellious ones) really don't care what their parents think. Smacking early on is reasonable. Smacking into teens is a bit much. By then the kid is either going to be a fuck-wit waste of space or a suitable member of society. Smacking a fuck-wit only prolongs the inevitable.

Those that think 'violence is never the answer':

a) You've never had kids.
b) Your close-minded. You aren't necessarily a bad parent, but keep in mind what works for your family is different to others. Get off your high horse and jump back down into the real world where things are shit. Deal with it.
It's the right approach for parents to raise children that fears them? How in the cold, endless heavens could you possibly think that is a good idea? I can hardly comprehend the thought of growing up in fear of my own family, the one group of adults in the world that I'm supposed to fucking trust.

Your initial claim that not indoctrinating with violence is leading to the decline of western civilization is a little harmed by two facts that I can think of right now:

Most leaders, politicians or otherwise influential people are from the generations where spanking was viewed with greater appreciation. Yet they're obviously capable of both mistakes and wrong behaviour, since civilization apparently is about to collapse.

University enrollment continues to set new records, at least in europe, where the population size is more or less stagnated. This should indicate, methinks, that more modernly raised people are quite capable of self-discipline.

About your last two claims:

a: What does that change? Moral is always moral, independently of any specific situation. And even if I've never had a child, I, and most others, have certainly been one, which I also think should lend a modicum of credibility to claims that one makes.
b: In stating that "all families are different", do you not invalidate your right to assert what others should do and think?
 

SimuLord

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Aug 20, 2008
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One thing the Bible got right: "Spare the rod, spoil the child."

Children need to be taught healthy fear of and respect for authority, and violence is the only way that sticks. Don't give me that "time out" bullshit. Society's fucked up because five-across-the-eyes went out of style.
 

Dys

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Sep 10, 2008
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Housebroken Lunatic said:
Dys said:
Funny, I don't recall saying anything about fear. I most certainly don't think ones child should fear them (though it is only natural for people, including children, to have a fear of consequences which is exactly why I wear my seatbelt while driving a car, or use a condom when having sex with my girlfriend, or, as a child, set the table before dinner[1]), I also never said it was a good idea to strike a child in anger. You're reading way beyond what I've said and misunderstanding the concept of a "smack".

Children, especially young children, do not necessarily have the communication skills to understand why their parents are telling them what to do. A smack to the bottom (not a full forced whack, a light, sharp smack) demonstrates to them that they are in trouble and that you are serious. You don't need to hurt them, I never said you should hurt them. I said that it was often beneficial to spank a child and it's absolutely stupid to claim that it's always the wrong way to raise a child (especially given how many parents employed this technique and have raised respectful, hardworking, law abiding members of society) and even more stupid to try and claim it's child abuse.
"Respectful, hardworking, law abiding members of sociey"... Yeah right. That's about as believable as all he people in this thread who all feel that they "turned out ok in the end". Of course that's what they are going to say (regardless of the truth of things), anything else would be an admission of something being wrong with themselves.

But I'll play along wih your argument for awhile. Tell me, if it's just a "light smack to the bottom" that doesn't hurt or injure, you mean to tell me that it's no really about inflicting pain?
How can you not play along with that argument? The overwhelming majority of people have been raised that way, and guess what....most people don't turn out to be violent thugs. What portion of the people on this site do you think go out and beat people? Do you have any idea how stupid what your contending here is? 100 years ago *every* child was spanked/physically disciplined as a matter of course, by your logic, then, the streets should have been overrun with 'a clockwork orange' style thugs. Unless every history lesson I've ever had, and every bit of reading I've done in my life is entirely fabricated (most likely by those conspiring bastards who love beating children), you're full of shit.

I also don't understand, at all, what I've bolded. A light smack on the bottom that doesn't hurt or injure is clearly not about inflicting pain, it's about asserting control and demonstrating that you are in authority, while making it clear to the child that you are very upset with their behavior. I'm not saying that it's a good idea to smack your child whenever they forget to say 'thank you', but sometimes children get carried away and it's an effective, harmless way to draw them back to reality.

Because if that's what you're saying, you will inevitably have to concede to the fact that you yourself believe that children can respond to other types of communication than the infliction of pain. Naturally this begs the question that if it isn't about inflicting pain, then why couldn't you use a less barbaric and civlized way of communicating your idea to the child?
No, won't. That's stupid. I said that some children may respond to other types of communication, with varying degrees of success, but that doesn't make spanking any more wrong. I sure as all fuck do not concede that there is anything barbaric of spanking a child. Surely it's more barbaric to let a child grow up free of discipline and end up broken, unable to cope living in a world with real consequences (and, just a fun fact, when you fuck up in the real world, it quite possibly can lead to real pain).
However, if it IS about inflicting pain, hen how is that any more right than any other form of torture?

Trust me, I know plenty of ways to hurt you in ways you will find excruciating, but won't really cause you much in the way of physical injury (I won't even have to leave a mark on your body). Are you saying that I shouldn't be arrested and tried for assault if I used these methods on you with the intenion of "teaching you some manners"?

Take waterboarding for instance (a technique considered by many counries across the world to be a form of torture and thus banned). You're not going to die by being subjected to waterboarding. You're not even going to have any permanent marks on your body or suffer any oher kind of disabiliy as a result of physical injury, since waterboarding doesn't really cause any physical injuries.

Does that make it right and proper to use when teaching random strangers "some manners"? And if not, why would you teach that lesson to a child that it is okay to use violence (as long as it doesn't cause physical injuries) against people? Because that's exactly what the child is being taught. The child is being taught that tolerating certain forms of violence with the specific intention of degrading, humiliating and cause people pain and physical discomfort is yay-okay.

So which is it? Is it about causing pain or not? Eiher way, your argument contains a shitload of flaws.

I don't really care what you're going to try and argue in your attempt to refute this. It's obvious that you somehow believe that spanking is some kind of "magical solution" that will ALWAYS instill the EXACT meaning that the parent might want to instill in the child.
...I never said this, I simply said that it was potentially effective and in some situations a necissary way to parent. Are you deliberately missing everything I'm saying?
Realistically speaking however, that is far from the truth...

I'm genuinely unsure if you're High, stupid or trolling, but I'll say it again so it's abundantly clear:
Smacking a child is not about inflicting pain, it is not about inspiring fear and it is in no way tantamount to water boarding or torture. Really, what the fuck man! It isn't a magical tool that makes parenting easy, parenting IS NOT EASY! If you can't hack being the bad guy, and having to punish your children (which I promise is nearly always harder on the parent than the child) then you have absolutely no business raising a child.

I honestly don't know how to explain this, but to even contend that a parent wants to torture their children inspires all kinds of questions about your connection with reality.

Whatever dream world you live in, reality doesn't work that way. It's this bullshit attitude of "it's barbaric to hit kids" or "I'm my kids friend before their parent" is exactly why so many kids are drugged up to the max and misdiagnosed with conditions like ADD. If you want to fuck up your own kids, that's fine, but there is absolutely nothing wrong with parents opting to stick with the proven, effective methods that mankind has employed for thousands of years.
 

tomtom94

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May 11, 2009
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I'm an advocate for corporal punishment for children if they misbehave.

I think the fact it's now illegal in Britain is one of the stupidest laws ever invented. Parents should have the right to discipline their child as they wish.
 

Mighty the Moose

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Aug 11, 2010
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Jewrean said:
No, sometimes it just needs to be done.

Have a look at the world around you. Pushy arrogant kids and teenagers that smoke, do drugs, and have sex early (like 10-12 years old), teens getting pregnant SUPER early, a general lack of respect for anyone but themselves and a severe lack of discipline. It didn't used to be like this. Yes there was a golden age when children FEARED the adults and as a result learned respect VERY quickly. The reason the world is now a shit hole is because of the PC Police (politically correct) that fight for minority groups and punish the majority whenever possible. It is because of this reason that we have seen a spiraling decay of ignorance, laziness, and poor upbringing from our children into parents back intro children again. The cycle will continue and the human race (at least Westerners) will continue to get stupider and stupider. Unless something radical is changed then we can all circle the cesspool of a drain we call life together. This is one of the core reasons why China will consume America and all Western society.
Those are some serious claims and, to be clear, you are arguing that more spanking and less PC will resolve these huge societal dilemmas? I don't know where you are from, but I am from the United States (perhaps like you?) and here evidence has shown almost exactly the opposite of what you believe.

For example, and this may come as a surprise to some of our European friends, school spanking is still practiced in the United States, though 30 states have abolished it outright. The ones that still practice school spanking are generally in the South. You know Texas, Mississippi, Alabama, New Mexico, Arizona, etc. Guess which states have the highest rates of teen pregnancy (at least in 2006)? That's right, Texas, Mississippi, New Mexico, etc.

Guess which states have the lowest rate of teen pregnancy? Vermont, Maine, New Hampshire and Connecticut - you know, those solid blue, liberal states where the PC police run rampant and terrorize the neighborhood with their laser rifles and gestapo uniforms. If I recall correctly, I believe these are also the same states with no 'family values'. Liberal families in these states also tend to spank their kids much less frequently than conservative families. BTW, kids from these no 'family values' families tend to do better in school and attend college more frequently as well.

Is there any statistically significant relationship between spanking and teen pregnancy? Certainly none that I know of, but you seem to think so, so I thought I would throw that out there. Oh and finally, those minority groups you appear to dislike (and of which my girlfriend is a part btw) demonstrate among the highest rates of support *for* spanking,
 

Aesir23

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Sometimes it's needed. I mean, don't go and give the kid a full beating, but some kids more than need a few smacks on the rump. I agree that there are some cases where parents go too far and in that case, someone should definitely step in and intervene.

The idea that spanking causes life long emotional/mental scarring seems, well, a little absurd. I was spanked a fair bit as a kid and I can fully say that I deserved it because I was a complete brat. Any emotional/mental scarring I have now is from being bullied, not from being spanked as a child.
 

Mr. Gency

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BudZer said:
I believe it can be amazing when used sexually, but no, I don't think it's right.
Agreed, if you get off on that kind thing and keep it in the bedroom, spank 'til your ass turns red.
 

MelziGurl

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Jan 16, 2009
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I don't think it's wrong, but there are people who do get carried away. And I believe, if it's at all possible that some form of boot camp should be brought into schools as deterrent for certain bad behaviours. Suspensions etc just don't cut it for this generation of kids.
 

AvsJoe

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May 28, 2009
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I like to think it works. I got spanked a few times and always learned my lesson. I got the belt when I was 5 or 6 for being an accomplice to arson (my little brother lit a picture frame on fire), and I haven't since been an accomplice to anything nor have I fucked around with fire.
 

Slangeveld

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Jun 1, 2010
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My parents, how ragefull they can sometimes be never struck me in anger. I have been hit by a good one several times but I only truly remember one. I think I turned out fine and if my actions at the time I remembered it are anything to go by, I totally deserved it. (Even though I might not have thought so at the time :p LOL)I don't remember being spanked though :S Hmm.... I dunno. I suppose if the reason for it was good enough.

So yea, sometimes it just needs to be done. People don't seem to realise that a child's software is not yet completed. So to speak. There are only that much things they can understand and so much things they will be impressed enough by to leave a message.

So if a child for example, hurts an animal because it does not yet understand the concept of pain, you will hurt the child so it realises that its not something nice.

A hit on the ear by the one they love the most (I would hope) leaves such a mark. Do it to often however, and not only will they not love you that much anymore they will indeed become unsure.

But what the fuck am I saying, I'm just a 19 year old kid with no kids of his own. Dx
 

krimson_dropz

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Aug 14, 2010
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saying violence doesnt solve any thing and toting that around as a new moral standerd demonize spanking is a very mature, reasonable mindset. this is why it is ineffective, as spanking is usually used to discipline small children who simply wouldnt be able to comprehend such a mindset.
 

interspark

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Dec 20, 2009
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well if parents just raised their kids right from the first place then they shouldnt have to resort to violence! if youve let your kids grow up to be arrogant brats then its likely due to lack of dicipline, so basically what im trying to get at is, if you do spank your kids regularly its likely unnecessary and the parent in question is just too strict and/or aggressive
 

krimson_dropz

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interspark said:
well if parents just raised their kids right from the first place then they shouldnt have to resort to violence! if youve let your kids grow up to be arrogant brats then its likely due to lack of dicipline, so basically what im trying to get at is, if you do spank your kids regularly its likely unnecessary and the parent in question is just too strict and/or aggressive
not true because as a child is developing they think differently such as during the egocentric stage simply talking to your child doesnt work because their brains literaly arent wired up adequetly to respond to that.
 

Exia91

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Jul 7, 2010
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Sup I said:
I got spanked. I believe I turned out ok.
I guess this.

OT:
If I ever spank my own kids? Well I need to get them first don't I. Maybe it doesn't happen at all. Problems solved?
Nah, I will have kids with my future wife someday. And I will spank them if they ask for it, in the sense that they deserved it!
 

Caligulove

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Sep 25, 2008
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Ultimately, I am undecided since I don't have any children of myself.

But, I imagine that every parent uses physical discipline in one way or another, whether that means slapping something out of their hands to taking them by the hand, forcibly out of a store etc.

I'll get back to you when I have kids