Poll: Do You Use the Word "Gay" as an Insult?

[Ldude893]

No, that would be like dubbing everything that's lame as "negro". There's nothing wrong about being gay.

 

[evilartist]

I'm also one of those guys who uses "gay" when I really mean "lame" or "that sucks." Besides, what's so insulting about "gay", anyway? It's easier to say "I'm gay" instead of "I'm homosexual". The latter is just a mouthful.

 

[CarpathianMuffin]

I find it annoying. Always have.
Thus I never use it as an insult. When I say that somebody looks gay, I mean that they fit the stereotypical depiction of a gay person.

 

[SilverUchiha]

I'll often let the word "gay" slip to say something is lame. It's like the use of the word "******" in South Park referring to those douchebag Harley Riders. The words really don't have their meaning set in stone as the meaning seems to change over the course of time. Eventually, when homosexual relations are considered equal to hetero or otherwise universally (which is not likely to happen for some time), I get a feeling words like these will be less common as a whole... oh I'm rambling again. lol

 

[Aisaku]

ever sinse i was a kid and everyone i knew semed to throw the word "gay" around to insult others, i've been baffled by the reason for this. my question is, do the other escapees use the word "gay" as an insult and, if not, what they think of others that do

Do yourself a favor, learn how to spell.

 

[Necrofudge]

Only to homophobic people because they're the only ones who are bothered by the idea.
Other than that, I try to avoid saying it.

However, my friends use it a lot without really paying attention. Instead of saying that a situation was stupid, they might say "that was gay, dude"
I don't blame 'em though and neither should anyone else.

 

[Treblaine]

I find this acceptable because while you are associating the word "gay" in a negative context, it in no way means you feel that gays are something to be viewed in a negative context. Take a look at the Harley driver episode of Southpark. No one calls each other "fags" because they hate gay people. The original meaning of those words has been subverted to general use for everything, and only the bleeding heart liberals think that you are disparaging a particular section of the population when you use those words.

Just remember folks, it's not the words but how you mean them. Y'all have a fucking nice day!

Thing is, despite how you intend to use the word, the fact that some people use the word as an insult towards gay people means there is still a problem. Put yourself in my shoes. As a closeted gay man in high school, when I heard the word gay used as an insult, where gay=stupid, what does that make me think? You have to realize, there are people around you that are gay, and you don't know they are. And being closeted means you are scared. You already feel horribly out of place, afraid that one person finding out will destroy your social life. And hearing gay mean stupid makes you feel even worse.

Isn't that just projecting your own sense of inadequacy or inferiority on other's words? I'm not saying you're wrong, because I didn't hear what context your friends used it in, but if you were my friend, you wouldn't have anything to worry about.

Now, in the context of highschool, I DO see the issue. Highschool is ruthless, so coming out there would probably be a bad idea. Still, in all my years of hearing people use it, never have I felt that some one was hating on a gay person just by using that word.

Trust me, as a strait dude, if we wanted to be insulting, gay is hardly the word we'd use. "Gay" is just saying it like it is, but to express true animosity, we'd spit other words like "******" "Queer" or "fudgepacker" directly at you. You just can't spit the word "gay" as offensively.

Different person here but DUUUHHH! Isn't it obvious?

It's making clear that gays are not welcome by only using it in a negative context. It makes him feel unwanted and emboldens prejudiced minds to shun those who are openly gay.

Remember, the spectrum of prejudice is continuous and varies from person to person. It's not a case of Love or Hate, it can be a matter of disgust. Disgust is highly distinct from hate (though they can come together in precipitating acts of discrimination), using terms like "gay" may not be "hating on a gay person" but it is certainly dismissing and ostracising gayness as something unconditionally repugnant. i.e. something you both don't want to be and don't want to be associated with.

You think just because you have worse terms for directly attacking gay men, like calling them "fudge packers", that somehow makes it acceptable to use gay as a general purpose insult? Huh? Two wrongs don't make a right. At best you are using the "straw man argument" fallacy by acting like you are using the term gay directly at known gay-men and only them. Not the case.

It's also just inappropriate. I've seen it applied to people who aren't acting in any way effeminate nor towards any gay stereotypes but just as a general purpose insult. No one would like to have private their sexuality and emotional bias being equated with a personal insult.

It is also revealing of the fears of the population. In previous generations you'd call someone a bastard as an insult, father-less, but people don't seem to be ashamed of having a non-typical family. But people are offended by the mere SUGGESTION of a non-typical sexuality, it's not the fact that one person uses it as an insult but because a given group knows it will have the desired effect of attacking them by undermining their sense of self and social standing.

It's obvious people of certain sexuality hold different standing socially.

So I suppose in a way the problem is not the actual word... but the underlying prejudice that makes the word so potent and hence popular. And that stems from sexual insecurity, they are self-doubting straights, probably because they have a far too idealised view of human sexuality.

But continued use of "gay" as a general purpose insult only INCREASES that sexual insecurity and prejudice in the population, and ostracising of people who actually are gay.

So quit it will you.

 

[Betancore]

I only say that something's gay when my friends are acting in a stereotypically homosexual manner. I used to use it a lot, but now I try to avoid it, because every time I say that something bad is 'gay' I'm saying that people who are gay are somehow bad too. It's a little difficult to break the habit, but I'm slowly phasing it out.

 

[laststandman]

Occasionally I do. I believe that the meaning of a word can change over time, as is clearly visible by the word "gay" itself. In that sense I think that it is natural for a word's meaning to change.
However I hardly use insults at all. I think that they are a short way out of expressing one's feelings. I usually articulate exactly why I am feeling a certain way to a a person rather than call them a name.
But I think that not using the word "gay" because it also means homosexual is idiotic and hypocritical. Our language is built off of double-meaning words, many of which are originally insulting as well. The word "moron" was used to describe a degree of mental retardation, but now means stupid.
I also think that most people when they say something is "gay" do not think to connect it with homosexuality. This being said, I don't think homosexuals are stupid, but I have used the term "gay" as an insult before.
A better reason not to accept the use of the word "gay" as an insult is that it dumbs down English-language articulation to the point where people accept a short term for a deeper feeling, not that it refers to a certain group of people.

 

[AdmiralMemo]

Just because I said I don't, doesn't mean that I haven't. I have, in the past, on rare occasions. And it's not in the reasoning that I disagree with the connotation of it being an insult. If that were so, we'd have to get rid of things like "lame" and "sucks" and "blows" because those could be taken derogatorily as well. Heck, you could even add something like "weak" in there.

I just haven't believed it was a good insult.

 

[Nazulu]

As a joke and not the one that implys homosexual. Usually it's a replacement for lame or retarded like in South Park.

 

[AviaJiutai]

Only as a very rare joke to friends. Which is ironic as my closest friends are gay.
It's the only time I can say "No, you're gay." and it has a humourous meaning in a non hurtful way.

 

[The_Echo]

Any word that can be used as an insult, I'll use.

In fact, even words that aren't insults are in my vocabulary of insults. I have called people earlobes before.

 

[Korolev]

I definitely try not to. I make an effort. Sometimes I slip up and I apologize. The important thing is to try.

I recognize that many people don't really want to insult gay people when they use that word in a negative sense - I grew up in Australia, and if you went to school, that's how kids talked. It was just part of the slang.

However, I still think people should try not to use that word. Come on, at least make an effort.

 

[BlumiereBleck]

Occasionally. When the moment is right

 

[Signa]

I find this acceptable because while you are associating the word "gay" in a negative context, it in no way means you feel that gays are something to be viewed in a negative context. Take a look at the Harley driver episode of Southpark. No one calls each other "fags" because they hate gay people. The original meaning of those words has been subverted to general use for everything, and only the bleeding heart liberals think that you are disparaging a particular section of the population when you use those words.

Just remember folks, it's not the words but how you mean them. Y'all have a fucking nice day!

Thing is, despite how you intend to use the word, the fact that some people use the word as an insult towards gay people means there is still a problem. Put yourself in my shoes. As a closeted gay man in high school, when I heard the word gay used as an insult, where gay=stupid, what does that make me think? You have to realize, there are people around you that are gay, and you don't know they are. And being closeted means you are scared. You already feel horribly out of place, afraid that one person finding out will destroy your social life. And hearing gay mean stupid makes you feel even worse.

Isn't that just projecting your own sense of inadequacy or inferiority on other's words? I'm not saying you're wrong, because I didn't hear what context your friends used it in, but if you were my friend, you wouldn't have anything to worry about.

Now, in the context of highschool, I DO see the issue. Highschool is ruthless, so coming out there would probably be a bad idea. Still, in all my years of hearing people use it, never have I felt that some one was hating on a gay person just by using that word.

Trust me, as a strait dude, if we wanted to be insulting, gay is hardly the word we'd use. "Gay" is just saying it like it is, but to express true animosity, we'd spit other words like "******" "Queer" or "fudgepacker" directly at you. You just can't spit the word "gay" as offensively.

Different person here but DUUUHHH! Isn't it obvious?

It's making clear that gays are not welcome by only using it in a negative context. It makes him feel unwanted and emboldens prejudiced minds to shun those who are openly gay.

Remember, the spectrum of prejudice is continuous and varies from person to person. It's not a case of Love or Hate, it can be a matter of disgust. Disgust is highly distinct from hate (though they can come together in precipitating acts of discrimination), using terms like "gay" may not be "hating on a gay person" but it is certainly dismissing and ostracising gayness as something unconditionally repugnant. i.e. something you both don't want to be and don't want to be associated with.

You had me backpeddling up to this point. Probably should have stopped there.

You think just because you have worse terms for directly attacking gay men, like calling them "fudge packers", that somehow makes it acceptable to use gay as a general purpose insult? Huh? Two wrongs don't make a right. At best you are using the "straw man argument" fallacy by acting like you are using the term gay directly at known gay-men and only them. Not the case.

It's not at all about having worse terms, it's about having terms to use when you want to be insulting. Saying "gay" is not being in insult mode. Saying "******" most likely is. How am I supposed to make some one feel bad when I call them gay when they already are? Can you insult me by calling me straight? Nope. Though I did like the insult some one else put forth. You could call me a "breeder" and then I know you are trying to offend. Face it, with political correctness, the mouthful of speech that each term people are supposed to use being too cumbersome to use in everyday scenarios. I really am not going to bother calling you a homosexual if "gay" means the exact same thing. I'd also accuse you of a straw man argument if you are trying to tell me what I meant when I said this thread was gay (I didn't, I just needed context). I can tell you right now I didn't mean anything against the gay members here. They are irrelevant to my opinion.

It's also just inappropriate. I've seen it applied to people who aren't acting in any way effeminate nor towards any gay stereotypes but just as a general purpose insult. No one would like to have private their sexuality and emotional bias being equated with a personal insult.

So why do we even need to identify ourselves by our sexuality? I mean it only plays an important part in our private lives, so what makes what gives us boners so damn important? It doesn't. Be a good person, treat others around you with respect (and I mean genuine respect, not some well-you-could-have-meant-something-else-other-than-what-you-said "disrespect"), talk about your jobs or what interest you. Stop spending so much time trying to find things that insult you, and stop living in fear of someone else hating you. You aren't always going to mesh with all of society.

It is also revealing of the fears of the population. In previous generations you'd call someone a bastard as an insult, father-less, but people don't seem to be ashamed of having a non-typical family. But people are offended by the mere SUGGESTION of a non-typical sexuality, it's not the fact that one person uses it as an insult but because a given group knows it will have the desired effect of attacking them by undermining their sense of self and social standing.

So your point could be twisted to mine saying that because the lack of a socially acceptable family structure used to be an insult, and now no one cares, couldn't the same happen with non-standard sexual preferences? Once that happens, then what? Are we going to come full circle and start making fun of people's appearances? Perhaps their dye-jobs? The point is that we are always going to find ways to insult each other, and while it was family structure, and now it's sexual preference, some time in the future, so new group of people are going to get their kicks. The sooner you embrace that, the sooner it goes away. Causing arguments is just going to delay the cultural evolution that is occurring.

It's obvious people of certain sexuality hold different standing socially.

So I suppose in a way the problem is not the actual word... but the underlying prejudice that makes the word so potent and hence popular. And that stems from sexual insecurity, they are self-doubting straights, probably because they have a far too idealised view of human sexuality.

But continued use of "gay" as a general purpose insult only INCREASES that sexual insecurity and prejudice in the population, and ostracising of people who actually are gay.

So quit it will you.

What is ostracizing people who are actually gay are the retards who think that it's ok to still discriminate them. My state still doesn't allow gay marriage, and that's FAR, FAR more of a hostile threat to gays than saying the word "gay" in situations you don't agree with. Also, more to your point, please see the post where I compared that argument to video game violence.

Spoiler: snip

I use the word gay for things i think are bad. "thats gay" "you're gay" "how gay is that?!"

I find this acceptable because while you are associating the word "gay" in a negative context, it in no way means you feel that gays are something to be viewed in a negative context. Take a look at the Harley driver episode of Southpark. No one calls each other "fags" because they hate gay people. The original meaning of those words has been subverted to general use for everything, and only the bleeding heart liberals think that you are disparaging a particular section of the population when you use those words.

Just remember folks, it's not the words but how you mean them. Y'all have a fucking nice day!

Really? Franzibald yacht spittoon truncheon magnificent lychee's salubrious.

Sorry? You mean you can't understand what I'm saying? But wasn't it obvious that I meant: "You're talking utter bollocks if you think the meaning of words don't matter"?

Clearly, you're a complete idiot. Try and discern what I mean by that! If you take offense, do remind yourself that the actual words aren't relevant. It's what I mean when I say them.

Signa had a good point. The meaning of your words is the most important thing. He never said that the words themselves don't matter. The words themselves obviously matter. It is ludicrous to imply that relying on interpretation is the same as everyone speaking jibberish. The word gay can mean several different things. Its origional definition was nothing at all offensive. The word idiot, on the other hand, currently only has one definition. This makes it a terrible example for the point you were trying to make.

Altering a persons argument to make it easier to counter is called a "strawman argument."

The fact of the matter is that using words like this as something negative when it also means something else(In this case, homosexual) reinforces negative feelings towards it on you or other people you are talking to. Whether or not you actually have any negativity towards homosexuality doesn't matter.

As decent as this argument is, it holds as much water as the "videogames cause violence" argument. On the surface it makes sense: game allows kid violent action, kid emulates violent action outside of simulation. The problem is that argument doesn't allow for any leeway in the kid understanding the difference from real life and the game. MOST kids do, despite what watchdog groups say. So unless you actually have some evidence that the majority of the population who use the word "gay" in a negative context are actually affecting their perception of gays negatively, then I'd ask you to reevaluate your position. That is unless you think we are all weak-minded kids to start with.

Anyway, I think we've gone too far off topic here since we are now discussing gay rights and not the pros and cons of using "gay" in a sentence.

 

[RatRace123]

Yes, I admit that I do.
I don't have any hatred towards gay people, but its so ingrained into my brain that "gay" is a synonymn for "bad" or "dumb".
I blame my school.

 

[TheTurtleMan]

I might be in the minority here but I have no problem with people using the word gay as an insult. Whenever most people I know say something or someone is gay, they aren't comparing something bad to an actual gay person, it's just another word. Think about whenever someone calls something retarded, you know that they weren't thinking of mentally challenged people being bad. It's not about what words you say, it's about what context you use them in.

 

[Jaded Scribe]

I do occasionally, but when I do, the word has no direct relation to the homosexual term "gay". In my mind, the two are totally different.

Many words hold multiple meanings that are completely different things (aka "homonyms").

To me, saying "omg, this bug is so gay" is not referencing homosexuality in any way.

Language grows. It morphs. It changes. Original usage of the word gay had nothing to do with homosexuality. Just like the South Park episode around the word "fag".

If anything, those that get all knotted up about it are doing more harm than good. You're giving the word the power to be an insult. An insult is only potent if you give it power. Stop giving it power.