Poll: How long should you wait before having sex? What is the point in waiting?

[TheGuiggleMonster]

I have heard many times that you shouldn't rush a relationship but I question this general assumption. Things started between me and this girl a few weeks ago and we first had sex 3 days afterwards. We have had sex 4 more times since then. She has been the one who brought up the idea of sex every time so far and I have no problem with it and our relationship certainly seems to be going well. We get along just fine with no conflict.

So... What exactly is the point in waiting? How long should you wait? I don't really see the point but it might be that there is a point that I've completely missed.

In the poll the idea is that there are several time groups so choose the biggest amount of time in the group you think is about the right amount of time to wait at least. The first group is between one second and 24 hours, the second is between 2 days and a week and so on. If your answer is 3 weeks you choose option 4.

 

[Psymon138]

It depends on the people involved. I would wait a week, maybe two before I had sex with a new partner, simply because I wouldn't be comfortable rushing into a physical relationship any faster. At least I think so. If there was a lot of chemistry between us and it felt right, things might happen faster.

For another example, my girlfriend and I took about two months before we had sex. Mostly because I was the first serious relationship she had ever been in and the idea of losing her virginity was pretty scary for her. So really, it varies from person to person and situation to situation.

 

[Ziadaine_v1legacy]

Depends. My first (and hers) it took us 4 months to have sex. that was 2 years ago. My new general rule is if she/he doesnt want to have sex within the first month, they're not commited. Might sound selfish but the amount of shit relationships ive been in, I dont want a repeat.

 

[icame]

As soon as she'll drop em'! *slaps self*

*Cough*..

I think it should happen whenever the couple feels they should. But I think 'getting it on' only 3 days in is pushing it a little bit. I think this is just so that your relationship doesn't become based around the your 'physical' relationship.

 

[Terminal Blue]

You should add a 'when you want to' option.

Though I don't think I'd have sex with someone as soon as I met them anymore. There's nothing worse than waking up with someone and realizing you really don't like them.

 

[notyouraveragejoe]

I've not really got much to go on here (considering I've had sex with two girls and am currently still having sex with both of them). For my girlfriend (my first time) we waited for about 2ish weeks but that was mostly because I was a little scared and she was...unavailable. For the other girl I just asked her if she wanted to (we're not dating or anything) and yeah. I mean...personally I feel you should know the person well enough but not bother waiting a hell of a long time "just because".

 

[Slippers]

Depends on age.

I'd say a wait time of up to 2 months is somewhat acceptable. However anything longer than a month is already a bit too long for comfort.

Unless you're 14, intimacy is a major part of a relationship.

 

[BlueberryMUNCH]

Lul^, I was 14 when I first did haha, and intimacy was a big part...or so I thought.
In hindsight, I was a complete fucking dickhead and I'd do anything to go back and change things; I live every day now with crushing regret.

...um...yeah xD OT:

Well, in my major relationship we did it after 3 months, but it was also the 3rd time we'd seen one another xD.

Basically, when you both want to, just go for it mate:].

 

[Paksenarrion]

The poll above is ridiculous. It takes more than one year for your body to fully develop sexual organs.

Is this some sort of troll thread? You don't date newborns.

"But she said she was 18!"

What, months old? Why don't you have a seat riiiiiight there.

 

[Nerdygamer89]

The poll above is ridiculous. It takes more than one year for your body to fully develop sexual organs.

Is this some sort of troll thread? You don't date newborns.

"But she said she was 18!"

What, months old? Why don't you have a seat riiiiiight there.

Spoiler

OP: it depends on the people involved. For some, one-two dates is enough.

 

[similar.squirrel]

It depends on the people involved. It took me almost two years, for example [sex, not foreplay], but I know others who have done it after a week or two.
At the same time, I wouldn't consider myself to be in a relationship with someone after any less than two weeks.
Those first fourteen days are a trial period, so to speak. If the demo offers that particular feature, I see no harm in availing of it.

 

[Nickolai77]

All depends on the people involved (what's this, i hear an echo!)

There are many people who get pissed one night, meet up, fancy one another, have sex and wake up next to one another, and start the relationship from there. (If it's not a one-night stand)

On the other hand, there are couples whom don't have sex until marrage...so it very much depends on the persons involved.

 

[Nimcha]

Waiting for no apparent reason before engaging in one of the most important and most fun activities of a relationship? Madness!

I don't wait, but don't force it either. If we like each other it'll happen. With my current that was the day we met, heh.

 

[natural20]

I put down 6 months, but my normal answer would be wait for marriage. Sex is a very different kind of bond between two people, emotionally, physically, and chemically. Don't push it, and don't get pushed into it, because it ties you to your lover in new ways.

There's an awesome documentary on Netflix instant play called "The Science of Sex Appeal" that I highly recommend.

 

[Sandernista]

It depends on the people involved. I would wait a week, maybe two before I had sex with a new partner, simply because I wouldn't be comfortable rushing into a physical relationship any faster. At least I think so. If there was a lot of chemistry between us and it felt right, things might happen faster.

For another example, my girlfriend and I took about two months before we had sex. Mostly because I was the first serious relationship she had ever been in and the idea of losing her virginity was pretty scary for her. So really, it varies from person to person and situation to situation.

This, almost to the letter.