When I was growing up, I thought mental disorders were something that a minority of people had, but now I doubt I could name ten people I speak to who I know not to have one. Maybe this is due to widening of the term with gradually greater understanding and less stigmatization, but I find it a little worrying. I wonder if most people have these and simply appear to cope well with life, or if it still a minority of people and I've just tended to drift into groups personally affected by them.
I was diagnosed with Asperger's, a mild form of autism, some time before the turn of the decade, but the classification criteria were since changed and I didn't seek a second opinion. I was told that people diagnosed with this disorder have one side of their brain more highly developed than the other, and that they typically find numbers easier to deal with than the nuances of communication. I wouldn't say I suffer from it or that it that handicaps daily life, and I don't know how much of my daily behaviour it actually affects. It may have been the reason for using unusually formal or archaic language when speaking to people over the years, because I couldn't point to one specific reason why I viewed spoken or written communication like reading from a manual rather than paying attention to the specific situation to determine what was most appropriate. I was inconsistent in picking up on social cues or reading facial/body language. It has led to much misunderstanding, some playground bullying, ridicule and the sense of shame that comes with it, continuing frustration and, at its worst, some deep-seated resentment of people in general, but all of life's a learning process and I've still probably been dealt a better hand than most people. Knowing that, I feel worse if using it as an excuse for lashing out. That feels like making it someone else's problem, like trying to make a bad mood better by spreading it around, and burdening nearby people who would probably help if they could but are at a bit of a loss for how to do so. That makes it worse.
What about you? Do you have one, or know someone with one, and how has it changed your life? How do you make the best of what you have?
I was diagnosed with Asperger's, a mild form of autism, some time before the turn of the decade, but the classification criteria were since changed and I didn't seek a second opinion. I was told that people diagnosed with this disorder have one side of their brain more highly developed than the other, and that they typically find numbers easier to deal with than the nuances of communication. I wouldn't say I suffer from it or that it that handicaps daily life, and I don't know how much of my daily behaviour it actually affects. It may have been the reason for using unusually formal or archaic language when speaking to people over the years, because I couldn't point to one specific reason why I viewed spoken or written communication like reading from a manual rather than paying attention to the specific situation to determine what was most appropriate. I was inconsistent in picking up on social cues or reading facial/body language. It has led to much misunderstanding, some playground bullying, ridicule and the sense of shame that comes with it, continuing frustration and, at its worst, some deep-seated resentment of people in general, but all of life's a learning process and I've still probably been dealt a better hand than most people. Knowing that, I feel worse if using it as an excuse for lashing out. That feels like making it someone else's problem, like trying to make a bad mood better by spreading it around, and burdening nearby people who would probably help if they could but are at a bit of a loss for how to do so. That makes it worse.
What about you? Do you have one, or know someone with one, and how has it changed your life? How do you make the best of what you have?
