I like myself. I'm generally a smart person, probably one of the most privleged people my age. I'm starting college a semester late because i've built up a considerable number of transfer credits, so I get to spend three months in Iceland, then a month traveling around Europe, then I finally have to go back to mundanity. During those three months, i've been going completely without videogames (Though I regularly still talk to people about videogames) and I'm proud of that fact, as the amount of time I used to spend playing games slowly whittled my self-esteem down to surprisingly little (Through no fault of themselves, just the fact that my grades suffered, my parents disapproved of me, and I felt like I had no control over anything. (even though it was the fact that I chose to play games so much that caused the problem in the first place)). Kicking that habit so hard (I didn't bring my gaming rig to Iceland even though I was invited to) made me feel empowered and strong. It's also opened up a lot of time for me to pursue things like exercise, traveling around Iceland, hanging out with my sister (who is one of the coolest people I've had the opportunity to meet), learn some Python, get a head start on the things i'm going to be learning in college. All this has made me wonderfully confident, though I still fret about loose ends.
For most of my life, i've been uncertain, miserable, and often stressed-out. One day I decided that that wasn't who I wanted to be. That decision didn't really help much, I still was uncertain, miserable and often stressed-out, but I kept that thought in the back of my head, which usually made it worse. most of what would be summer if I weren't a senior kept me that way, but I then my sister offered to let me stay in Iceland, and perhaps it was the complete change in tone. I went from being in the Middle of Fucking Nowhere, with parents who obviously cared, but often cared too much, wouldn't let me drive, and the only person who wanted to talk to me was the single most annoying person in the entire school (If it were a summer camp, this would be another cheap, moral reconciliation movie). A month and a half ago I flew to Iceland on my own money from the government (Social security money after I turned 18, presumably from my biological father dying), and live in a small-ish apartment in the middle of Reykjavik, the largest city in Iceland, with my sister and her husband, people too preoccupied with their own lives to squash me, and let me go wherever I could bike, run or walk (which is a surprising number of places). While I don't have any friends here, just a computer at home, and a tablet that I can take wherever I want, I've been pretty happy.
I'm pretty sure that that'll come off as a bit narcissistic, but whatever. (and, man, that is one hell of a lot of parentheticals.)
