Maraveno said:
what is it with this site and people calling bigotry on everything lately?
PS agree wholeheartedly with your post
Thanks! But as for your question: I really have no idea.
BGH122 said:
Of course, I know men get raped too. We've discussed that and I discussed it in the very post you've quoted. I honestly don't know how many men get raped for the reasons previously mentioned, but I personally know of at least one. Sadly, he said he'd never go to the police because he didn't think anyone would take him seriously. Even sadder, I think he's right.
I wasn't strictly talking about men getting raped by women. (And there's also the stigma against men who get raped: While people are less likely to try to blame the victim, he's going to get attacked on other counts.)
I'm oversimplifying by saying 'wrong', but you get the gist. Do I think that such gender roles are harmful? I think they can be, but aren't necessarily. I know I'd prefer a society that tolerated things that can be harmful as long as they aren't actively harming anyone than a society which deemed certain behaviours necessarily destructive merely because they can be.
I think great care needs to be taken to show that all interpretations of gender are equally valid as it's essentially a social construct with no fixed objective truth. I think great care needs to be taken to ensure that in doing so we don't throw the baby out with the bathwater: that we don't deem older gender roles 'wrong' just because they hark of fixed gender roles. It's the latter we need to address, not the former; if someone wishes to act like a 50's man or a 50's woman then that's their business and as long as they don't demand others act in such a way then we have no right to judge.
Yes, I'm sure that if everyone was willing to leave well enough alone, just acting "traditional" would be all well and good.
However, our culture stigmatizes passive, deferential behavior from men. In fact, such behavior is certain to get pretty much anyone classed as weak and ineffectual; one must be assertive or even aggressive to be taken seriously. And yet, aggressive or assertive women are stigmatized to...well, at least
about the same degree as passive, deferential men.
So while the gender roles
themselves may not be inherently harmful, the fact that they
are fixed (that is, socially enforced)
is. As is the fact that "feminine" behavior is considered inherently inferior. Until neither is the case, we really won't
know how many people actually prefer to conform to them.
Because it perfectly fits the definition?
An outdated definition that pretty much turns it into a synonym for "fanatic." (And I doubt she's even one of
those.)
Geekosaurus said:
Well that's just sexist. It can work both ways, just like everything else.
Indeed, and I doubt anyone is really arguing otherwise.