Poll: If you were spanked as a child, do you think it made you a better person?
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Yes, not all the time but just when I really deserved it and never by anyone other than my mum and dad. I think it taught me was right and wrong very well and now I am a very responsible person, similar to some people my auntie and uncle didn't spank they're children and there some of the worst kids I've seen, they have no respect at all for their parents.
I was spanked as a kid during my elementary years before 4th grade. I can't say that it makes me a better person because honestly, I'm not a big fan of parents beating their kids. Sure it's to discipline them, but some parents do it more often, even when they deserves a lecture more than a beating.
I was spanked (only a few times, up until I was around 7) and I don't think it affected me at all. I was hit on the ass, so what? It's my ass, I don't care. It hurt for a few seconds, but it didn't traumatize me, and I don't really remember it enough so that it affected me, making me a better or worse person. Unless my subconscious mind remembers it and somehow changes me behavior.
What about the 'was spanked but do/dont support it' options?
OT: I was spanked for lots of things over my childhood, and i'm undecided as to whether it made me a 'better' person. Mainly because 'better' is pretty subjective anyway. I suppose my parents believe it must have helped make me 'better' but who is to say. Not sure how I would've turned out if I wasn't hit, but I suppose it hasn't made me that 'bad' a person either.
OT: I was spanked for lots of things over my childhood, and i'm undecided as to whether it made me a 'better' person. Mainly because 'better' is pretty subjective anyway. I suppose my parents believe it must have helped make me 'better' but who is to say. Not sure how I would've turned out if I wasn't hit, but I suppose it hasn't made me that 'bad' a person either.
1. I tried to explain that they worked really hard to raise me and my sisters so they certainly aren't lazy and honestly, I live in Australia so I have no idea what you mean by stupidly conservative (I know it's a word used a lot in America to represent Republicans and such). I assume you mean like "Tied to the ways of the cane", which they weren't, although they did fully believe in smacking, and often explained why they were doing it.Lucifron said:
2. It was usually a single slap but if I was still causing problems they might give me another and send me to the bathroom for 10 minutes or sometimes just send me to the bathroom. I was generally a good kid but I was also smart so I tried many sstupid things to get my way and crying was kind of my final push. I don't think it ever worked in my favour though...
I wasn't so much attacking you but the mind-set you produced because I know many people have it and I wish it would stop. Those who were smacked weren't done so by hick parents, they were caring parents who genuinely believe it was the best way to get their point across when reason didn't work. Some may be hicks but not mine.
I didn't just get smacked, I got something that was in between the punishments my parents got as children and the punishments of today...which are too tame in my opinion.
Yes I support smacking, it did me no harm and I have never been given reason to resent my parents for it. I'm well grounded as well as treat and respect others the way I expect to be. My best mate allows me to smack her own children when they misbehave and it's NEVER hard, needless the say they do not like it all the same. I roused on my god-daughter yesterday for playing with a switch (turning off my computer in the process) and it scared her more than any smack she's been given. So the idea that smacking has a more traumatising affect on kids than raising your voice is quite ridiculous, as both can clearly produce the same result.
Yes I support smacking, it did me no harm and I have never been given reason to resent my parents for it. I'm well grounded as well as treat and respect others the way I expect to be. My best mate allows me to smack her own children when they misbehave and it's NEVER hard, needless the say they do not like it all the same. I roused on my god-daughter yesterday for playing with a switch (turning off my computer in the process) and it scared her more than any smack she's been given. So the idea that smacking has a more traumatising affect on kids than raising your voice is quite ridiculous, as both can clearly produce the same result.
I was spanked, slapped, canned, whipped with a belt and nearly had a pebble kill me.
I was still a spoiled brat, but as I grew older I became more mature. I guess physically disciplining your child reasonably works. I certainly detest my father for not teaching me right and using drastic measures in order to discipline me. My mother always said that he loved me, but the way he's showing it? He can go screw himself.
I guess the physical punishment didn't work for me, I just grew out of my spoiled brat complex.
I was still a spoiled brat, but as I grew older I became more mature. I guess physically disciplining your child reasonably works. I certainly detest my father for not teaching me right and using drastic measures in order to discipline me. My mother always said that he loved me, but the way he's showing it? He can go screw himself.
I guess the physical punishment didn't work for me, I just grew out of my spoiled brat complex.
I tend to disbelieve all studies on the effects smacking has on a child. I simply look at the ways in which times have changed between now and 40 years ago when smacking your children was the norm and children had more respect for themselves and others.Blitzwing said:
Never been spanked, i was raised with love.
Therefore i stayed away from smoking, drugs and all the bad shit thats out there.
I think spanking is a primitive method, on par with men beating their wife's because they can't express emotion via words.
I'd like to spank some of those mean parents, i know some that have horrible parents.
Its a sad thing to talk about, i'm very happy about my upbringing.
Therefore i stayed away from smoking, drugs and all the bad shit thats out there.
I think spanking is a primitive method, on par with men beating their wife's because they can't express emotion via words.
I'd like to spank some of those mean parents, i know some that have horrible parents.
Its a sad thing to talk about, i'm very happy about my upbringing.
Yes, I was spanked as a child, sometimes with a belt, depending on who did the spanking. It wasn't very often I was spanked, however. It was probably only about six times. Mostly, I was told why I was getting a spanking and not just beat without understanding what I'd done wrong, lol. So those two things combined, I think, helped me out alot. I would've been an evil child if I hadn't been spanked, lol. When I was really young, I was mean 
.
Also, it's funny this came up as I just posted basically the same thing on another forum I frequent in a different topic.
. Also, it's funny this came up as I just posted basically the same thing on another forum I frequent in a different topic.
Well, as I said, single slaps are conceivable justifiable a bunch of times. I oppose banning the practice completely, like my own country has done (seriously, parents can almost lose custody of their own kids because of a single slap), it is the practice of repeated slaps or beatings that I oppose.Nyaliva said:
My original post was probably too general for its good, in any case.
Seriously, what will it take to make you stop forcing statistics down our throats? You sound like you're waiting for someone to congratulate you on your research, statistical and debating prowess. If someone says spanking is the best form of punishment, you can whip out your statistics and seem smart. Until then you're just making the same point over and over while others are trying to compromise with you and overall, it makes you sound like a bit of a jerk. The reason I continue to contest you is not to piss you off or to troll you (I'd never dare troll anyone with statistics to back them up!!!!), I do it to find a compromise, saying okay, so much of the time it doesn't work, but it worked for me and my sisters and I'm going to use the same tactic to teach discipline to my children, I'll only be using it in extreme cases and if it still doesn't seem to work or is causing damage I'll find another tactic. And yet, you keep coming back with your "data". Do you think someone is going to come here looking for parenting advice and might decide to smack their children because of something I said, so you provide a rebuttal hoping to deter them at the last second? I can't see any other reason for your continuous, same-y argument.Blitzwing said:
Oh and what "case" am I trying to "prove" in the above post? I've already said that smacking isn't an all-purpose discipline tool so you can't mean that. I've said smacking certainly can be done wrong and often is, so objecting to that would be contradiction. The only other thing I said is it worked for me. That is not something I really need to "prove". Are you wanting me to pull statistics from various points in my childhood and my entire life to prove that being smacked as a kid made me a better person? That's a bit of a dick move I'd say. And besides, I don't really need to prove that to anyone, especially not you. I said above that it certainly CAN be detrimental and certainly ISN'T for everyone, which actually agrees with you so you really can't be contesting that. The only other thing I said was how I turned out proves to ME that it works. Which is firstly, none of your concern, and second if it didn't work and I've become bitter, lonely and resentful, do you think I'd be arguing with the likes of you for this long whilst contradicting myself? I think you're just a little bit on auto-troll now because if you weren't than you'd see by now that your data isn't what we're contesting, it's your clinginess to that data and basing your entire idea on it and shooting down anyone who's had FIRST HAND EXPERIENCE!!! Seriously, people aren't going to take our advice on how to raise their child. We've said time and again that it has to be done right. You know what, I'll make a public service announcement:
ATTENTION ALL POTENTIAL PARENTS! Spanking should only be done IF YOU KNOW HOW TO DO IT. If you do not know the right conduct taken from first hand experience, do not try it. You could cause PERMANENT PSYCHOLOGICAL DAMAGE TO YOUR CHILD. Try any and all other non-violent methods to help raise your child. DO NOT TAKE OUR ADVICE. Despite our first hand experiences, this is not the kind of advice you should use to raise your children, we are simply making the point that it can be done and have positive effects and no extremely negative ones.
Will that make you happy? I'm sure it won't...
You ask anyone who came from that era or earlier, they will tell you that respect was at a mucm MUCH higher standard than what it is today. Time is all the evidence you need, where's your evidence then to counter my statement? You want evidence, how about you provide some evidence that might just change my opinion on the matter.Blitzwing said:
Voted yes, primarily because it happened to me; I won't say I'm a good person, but I could be significantly worse.
For any good intention, spanking reminds children that they are not entitled to their whims by reminding them that they have other needs too (like, say, staying away from the pain of a spanking). It should also let the child know to respect their parents; parents are not merely benefactors or 'buddies' to children (if even); first and foremost, they are guardians to their childrens' growth. Granted, spanking is a tool to instill a basic fear of pain, which any normal person makes more complex over the years; spanking doesn't work when used excessively or out of anger (AKA beating). Talking only gets so far; tending towards worst, their sense of entitlement allows them to SCREAM OVER your attempts at reasoning, towards best, they learn what's reasonable, but can turn into this over time:
For any good intention, spanking reminds children that they are not entitled to their whims by reminding them that they have other needs too (like, say, staying away from the pain of a spanking). It should also let the child know to respect their parents; parents are not merely benefactors or 'buddies' to children (if even); first and foremost, they are guardians to their childrens' growth. Granted, spanking is a tool to instill a basic fear of pain, which any normal person makes more complex over the years; spanking doesn't work when used excessively or out of anger (AKA beating). Talking only gets so far; tending towards worst, their sense of entitlement allows them to SCREAM OVER your attempts at reasoning, towards best, they learn what's reasonable, but can turn into this over time:
While this is actually pretty normal, the degree to which this can turn into a bad thing for others can be tremendous (insert dirty politician here:__________)Taldeer said:
