Poll: Is it wrong to automatically assume some is heterosexual?

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Flatfrog

New member
Dec 29, 2010
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I'm going to go against the majority here: yes, it's wrong to make that assumption in any circumstances where you would actually need to.

What I mean by that is: when I meet someone, their sexuality is usually completely irrelevant to my interaction with them. I'm not 'assuming' they're straight (although obviously if called on to make a guess, I'd guess that they were, since that's the most likely option), I'm making no judgement on the subject one way or the other.

At the moment when the question becomes relevant (eg, when asking if someone has a partner), I think it is a little bit rude to assume they are straight, and it's better to word the question in such a way that it doesn't prejudice the issue either way. So 'are you in a relationship?' is a better question than 'do you have a girlfriend?'. Not that I think anyone would be offended either way (I did say 'a little bit'!), but it's good training, a reminder to yourself that yes, statistically there is a more probable answer, but it's not the only possible answer.

It's the same argument as saying that, if you're talking about a generic nurse, it's good practice to say 'they' rather than 'she' until you know for sure, even if 95% of nurses are women (or whatever the actual figure is).
 

sam42ification

Senior Member
Nov 11, 2010
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letterbomber223 said:
sam42ification said:
letterbomber223 said:
Put in jail for what? Being gay and open about it. There's nothing new about homosexuality. Many rulers throughout history have had a preference for men; the only recent thing is its acceptance. Ostensible as it is.
Thats what i meant by a new thing. It has only recently been accepted. Yes he was put into jail for being gay and i think he was in there for six years (could be wrong) then he died in jail. Not sure how.
Right, and a world in which being gay is viewed as some kind of abnormality (which is unfortunately common) is only possible with a hetero-normative worldview; like 'people are straight and to treat everyone like they are straight is fine because it's statistically more common. Anyone who is gay/bi is awkward and should just deal with it.'
That kind of what i said in my first comment. That it is normal just to asume that. What i also said is that in the future it shouldn't be like that. "Anyone who is gay/bi is awkward and should just deal with"???? Thats just being a dick.
 

Asuka Soryu

New member
Jun 11, 2010
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I assume nothing. I don't think of anyones sexuality when I see them/talk to them unless they're actually flaunting it.
 

Scde2

Has gone too far in a few places
Mar 25, 2010
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It's not wrong, just gets a little irritating when people assume I'm straight because I'll then feel the need to correct them and I dislike telling most people that I am gay. How would most straight people react if most people assumed they were gay? But it's not offensive in the slightest and it's a reasonable assumption to make.
 

sam42ification

Senior Member
Nov 11, 2010
416
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letterbomber223 said:
sam42ification said:
letterbomber223 said:
Right, and a world in which being gay is viewed as some kind of abnormality (which is unfortunately common) is only possible with a hetero-normative worldview; like 'people are straight and to treat everyone like they are straight is fine because it's statistically more common. Anyone who is gay/bi is awkward and should just deal with it.'
That kind of what i said in my first comment. That it is normal just to asume that. What i also said is that in the future it shouldn't be like that. "Anyone who is gay/bi is awkward and should just deal with"???? Thats just being a dick.
'in the future'... Why wait? :)
I agree but because a lot of the people in parlement are old close minded dicks and won't allow gay/lesbain marrage. Plus there are a lot of old close minded dicks supportin them. (Or at least in Australia not sure how it is else where).
 

GotMalkAvian

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Feb 4, 2009
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Since roughly 9/10 of the population still identify as straight, I don't really think it's wrong to assume that someone falls into that category. To me, it's the same as assuming that someone doesn't have cancer or assuming that someone doesn't play D&D. I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with being gay at all (hell, I'm starting to think I swing a bit that way, myself) but it's definitely not the social norm by a longshot.

Likewise, I won't take offense if a gay man flirts with me. I will politely tell him that I'm flattered but not interested. I would expect the same courtesy if I ever flirt with a gay woman. We've all hit on someone who wasn't interested or been hit on by someone who didn't interest us, so why should the person's genitalia really change the situation that much?