Poll: Is your virginity worth saving?
- Thread starter BangSmashBoom
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It's worth keeping in very specific situations, like if you've been chosen to be the Bride of Kong and he'll smash your village and kill everyone you know if you're not a virgin. Otherwise, do what you feel is right for you.
For the record, I'm still a virgin at twenty. It's not because I value my virginity very highly. Hell, I've spent most of my life in the Catholic school system, and I find the whole brouhaha about it to be rather silly. My lingering virginity is more a product of my subpar social skills than anything else. It would take a very special person to deal with that long enough to even consider sex with me, so I'd probably hang on to that person for as long as I could.
However, I'm finding the very definition of virginity to be an increasingly murky thing. For example, we live in world where you can go on the internet, and start a private web cam show with another person, and get each other off without any physical contact. The line between virginity and the lack thereof is blurrier than ever to me.
For the record, I'm still a virgin at twenty. It's not because I value my virginity very highly. Hell, I've spent most of my life in the Catholic school system, and I find the whole brouhaha about it to be rather silly. My lingering virginity is more a product of my subpar social skills than anything else. It would take a very special person to deal with that long enough to even consider sex with me, so I'd probably hang on to that person for as long as I could.
However, I'm finding the very definition of virginity to be an increasingly murky thing. For example, we live in world where you can go on the internet, and start a private web cam show with another person, and get each other off without any physical contact. The line between virginity and the lack thereof is blurrier than ever to me.
Or she's just on it to protect herself. I don't see why you have to justify being on the pill with illness, it's just good sense.Moonlight Butterfly said:
I've been on the pill for nearly 5 years and I don't see why that would alter someone's opinion of me.
I'm saying that there some people who think things like that, they shouldn't, in my opinion but I can't exactly tell them how to think :/Colour-Scientist said:
Yeah and what the fuck happens when you save yourself for that special wedding night and then it turns out you and your partner are completely incompatible in bed?Zhukov said:
You should know these things before you get fucking married.
Losing your virginity isn?t like losing the remote. You lose it you lose it. It is something you should lose but you should lose it when you?re ready. And I suggest you find a women or man you love before you lose it. It feels better knowing someone you love took it rather than the tramp you picked up that one night you were drunker than Charlie sheen on Tuesday afternoon. Give it to someone you feel you can trust.
I know I say this so stupidly much it has probably lost all value but, don?t do anything stupid you?ll regret this time
I know I say this so stupidly much it has probably lost all value but, don?t do anything stupid you?ll regret this time
Mhh. Up to the people involved, and what they personally feel comfortable with, to my mind. Different belief systems or ethical or moral codes don't always agree. So long as you aren't harming others, far as I'm concerned I've no place to force you to follow mine...nor you any right to force me to follow yours. My own moral code does not have any issue with pre-marital sex, so long as those involved are honest with eachother and others and willing participants. It is not Christianity based, as I am not a member of that faith. In fact, my own beliefs suggest its better to have some experience with your partner before you choose to bind yourselves together for a theoretical lifetime. Knowing what you're getting into, who you're dealing with...their likes, their dislikes, and your own, before you go and make a commitment that's hopefully for a lifetime seems...rational, and healthy for both of you.
The first time is bad and awkward and should be done with someone you care about and who cares about you (embarrassing moments are best not shared with strangers). Marriage is 100% optional and I see no reason not to have sex with your first love or anyone else after that.
Is virginity in any way shape or form important? No. (Unless religion/culture dictates. - Led to many interesting conversations on the subject of boys, relationships, sex and marriage with my girls when I was working in Oman this time last year!)
However, sex is better the better you know your partner and they know you.
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However, sex is better the better you know your partner and they know you.
[sub]captcha is blatant advertising... "describe this brand with any word(s)" - I chose wankstain. Have THAT![/sub]
Depressing note aside, this is correct.DarkRyter said:
I place high value on my virginity for various reasons, so yeah, I'll keep it for when I'm married.
If you don't place value on your virginity, then why bother?
I think so, personally, but I believe it comes down to personal preference. I don't marriage is the best way to think about it though...my advice would be to save it for if you love someone. I see sex as the purest physical representation of love, so I think love should determine whether you engage in sex. I'm kind of a soppy romantic though.
However, if other people want to engage in it just for enjoyment, go for it. It's not really my business to tell them how to run their lives.
However, if other people want to engage in it just for enjoyment, go for it. It's not really my business to tell them how to run their lives.
I just...why not? Like, really, besides the whole "god will be pissed" thing, what is the downside to having sex before marriage, and with other people. I have been with other people, and my gf has been with other people. I don't care, she doesn't care, so why should god care?
I'd almost say the opposite if OP, that it's not a testament to your strength, not having sex with anyone before your spouse, but a detriment, because you have no experience, no bar, nothing to measure against and learn from, meaning that you might not be fulfilling your significant other. Not that sex should be "practice" but I think it's safe to say that those who do save themselves, might not be seeing the true importance of sex in a relationship.
I'd almost say the opposite if OP, that it's not a testament to your strength, not having sex with anyone before your spouse, but a detriment, because you have no experience, no bar, nothing to measure against and learn from, meaning that you might not be fulfilling your significant other. Not that sex should be "practice" but I think it's safe to say that those who do save themselves, might not be seeing the true importance of sex in a relationship.
This reminds me of something my dad once said about this subject... "Would you buy a car before you have a chance to try it out?" While I do say no to the poll, I just want EVERYONE TO KNOW that it's not because of what my dad said. It's mostly because I just don't care about anything the Bible has to say (proud atheist, whoop whoop) and that what I want to do with my life is my business.
My view entirely. Understanding what your loved one thinks about it is important. And if you don't have one, you have to consider what it means for you. I'm waiting because there is only one person I'm willing to practice with and that's my future wife. ^.^FalloutJack said:
I wrote a long winded reply. Then I realised it boiled down to this:
- I disagree with the OP due to not holding the same religious beliefs.
- Both marriage and virginity are outdated concepts that cause more harm than good.
- Sex is sex. It matters as much as you make it matter. It has as much worth as you give it. Same applies to your first time. Does it really matter to you? It mattered to me, to a degree, and it mattered to my current girlfriend, to a degree.
Now, don't get me wrong, I am not preaching free love. I am preaching 'Keeping your fucking nose out of other peoples business.' Go and do as you please people, as long as you are not involving me. And when I say marriage I mean the institution, not the concept. Speaking from experience sex in relationships is usually better than sex outside of relationships. I do not really think that much can be gained from waiting years before having sex with someone, to a degree I believe the opposite.
But waiting until you get married before you have sex? I cannot see the point.
Waiting until you are in love, though, that is a worthy cause. Not love in the eyes of god, not union in the eyes of the state, but love in the only eyes that matter, the eyes that look back at you from a mirror.
- I disagree with the OP due to not holding the same religious beliefs.
- Both marriage and virginity are outdated concepts that cause more harm than good.
- Sex is sex. It matters as much as you make it matter. It has as much worth as you give it. Same applies to your first time. Does it really matter to you? It mattered to me, to a degree, and it mattered to my current girlfriend, to a degree.
Now, don't get me wrong, I am not preaching free love. I am preaching 'Keeping your fucking nose out of other peoples business.' Go and do as you please people, as long as you are not involving me. And when I say marriage I mean the institution, not the concept. Speaking from experience sex in relationships is usually better than sex outside of relationships. I do not really think that much can be gained from waiting years before having sex with someone, to a degree I believe the opposite.
But waiting until you get married before you have sex? I cannot see the point.
Waiting until you are in love, though, that is a worthy cause. Not love in the eyes of god, not union in the eyes of the state, but love in the only eyes that matter, the eyes that look back at you from a mirror.
You do know that there's a "preview" button so you can see what your post will look like before you finally post it...BangSmashBoom said:
OT: Yeah, sure it is. While sex is a pretty integral part of modern relationships; virginity, while not being a tangible object, is still something special. You might as well save that for the person you're planning on marrying, even though you should still expect them to change over time.
saving your virginity is an old world idea, now its all about losing it as fast as you can. i don't really have a definitive opinion.
I'll only have sex with someone I really like. Also, using sex as an incentive for marriage is an incredibly stupid idea. There's a reason most marriages end up in divorce.