Poll: Ladies, Do you want a manly man, or a sweet guy?

[RouxBelle]

can't they be a bit of both? my bf is a manly man, yet he can be very sweet. and why does it have to be those two extremes? there are different girl's who want more than just a manly man or a sweet guy.

I was going to make a 'both' category, but I hit enter and messed it up, u can blame that on me being a dummy.

that's okay. sorry if i sounded kinda bitchy =P

 

[ZephrC]

*cough [small]objectification of women[/small] *cough cough

*cough [small]throwing around terms you don't understand[/small] *cough cough

 

[Donbett1974]

Most women have no ideal what they want. There led to believe they should get the perfect man but heres the really twisted thing if they do find thier perfect man they become insecure and then sabotage the relationship.

 

[acosn]

There is no "right" answer here. There's nothing set in stone for what defines "manly" or "sweet."

Sometimes the guy who's an absolute stone heart who's got the personality of a slab of granite will be sweeter than Mr. Bleeding heart for a single instance where they show someone important what they're feeling.

Other times that "sweet" guy will be absolutely manly when he floors Captain Douche Bag for trying to cop a feelie.

Regardless, it doesn't really matter that much- the majority doesn't matter, it's whom you're with that counts. Trying to paint people in broad strokes like this is just a bad idea.

 

[Labyrinth]

This is a false dichotomy.

Ding ding ding. Winner! Personality types are a hideous maze of continuums (continuui?) which can slide in multiple directions at any given time. It's like stating that the only two possible preferences for body shape are anorexic or bloated. Relationships just don't work like that I'm afraid, for all it would undoubtedly be simpler if they did. Les sinteresting, however.

I digress.

Being part of your target demographic let me explain my own preferences. I like people who are intelligent, challenging, confident and creative. None of those are characteristics specific to other personality types though I dislike douchebag behaviour immensely.

The stereotype of a "manly man" is only justifiable when taken in comedy. A "sweet" person is all fine and good, I can get along with people like that easily. It's when someone is a Nice Guy[sub]tm[/sub] that I get.. irate, to say the least. Nice Guy[sub]tm[/sub]s are manipulative, emotionally abusive, narcissistic fools who heap all the issues of their personalities onto the women they attempt to date and pine for attention in a manner that would shame a spoilt 9-year-old.

I'd also like to add this is horrendously heteronormative.

I'm sorry, but women lie. 90% of woman you ask this question will say they prefer sweet guys, but in reality 90% of women are attracted to the manly man.

I'm curious, have you ever actually spoken to enough women to make that analysis? Generalisations like that add nothing but a spiteful tang to an otherwise.. potentially interesting conversation.

 

[MelziGurl]

A little bit of both suits me and that's what I've got

 

[BonsaiK]

I don't think "manly" and "sweet" are mututally exclusive qualities.

Just relax, be healthy, be yourself and try not to be an asshole, and some girls will generally see either or both of those qualities in you at some point or another.

 

[Mandal0re]

Im going to sound like an arse hole here buuuut...

They dont know what they want so why even ask them?

Most will say sweet guys but most will be lying,even if they dont know it. Ultimately it comes down to confidence. Doesnt matter about any other facet of your personality and confident lads are more often cocky arrogant douches. Who girls turn down nice guys and then sleep with. And then go back to said nice guy and complain about what a prick he is.

 

[ZephrC]

I'm sorry, but women lie. 90% of woman you ask this question will say they prefer sweet guys, but in reality 90% of women are attracted to the manly man.

I'm curious, have you ever actually spoken to enough women to make that analysis? Generalisations like that add nothing but a spiteful tang to an otherwise.. potentially interesting conversation.

If I'm bitter, it's only because I've had to learn my lessons the hard way. From women I've known, yes. The actual 90% numbers are pure pulled out of my ass nonsense, obviously, but the general idea is correct.

To be fair, I honestly think more women are lying mainly to themselves as opposed to any sort of attempt to lead men into being less attractive. Not that the results are any better that way, but there's no bizarre conspiracy to confuse men, just a society that leaves women confused about what they want in such a manner as to cause them to confuse the men along with them.

Also, what's up with our society's irrational hatred of generalizations? I realize they have been used for hurtful purposes in the past, but as long as you keep in mind that individuals vary greatly and you can't judge a single person by a group they are a member of, generalizations can provide quite a bit of insight into the way the world works.

 

[Blow_Pop]

In the end the males who can be "manly" and "sweet" at the right times with the right intensity are the most successful.

This. If you can combine sweetness and manliness, that's just perfect.

I concour. But he also has to be a tall skinny nerdy white boy with glasses too

 

[MelziGurl]

Im going to sound like an arse hole here buuuut...

They dont know what they want so why even ask them?

Most will say sweet guys but most will be lying,even if they dont know it. Ultimately it comes down to confidence. Doesnt matter about any other facet of your personality and confident lads are more often cocky arrogant douches. Who girls turn down nice guys and then sleep with. And then go back to said nice guy and complain about what a prick he is.

You know, I agree with you. But the same can be said for men, because ultimately you have this idea of what you want but that's all it is...an idea, a fantasy which is not reality. You are either going to realise what you want when it's right in front of you or when it's suddenly taken away. The idea I HAD for a guy ended up being completely different to one I fell in love with.

 

[Zannah]

My personal theory regarding the general preferrance of 'manly men' (Given that my boyfriend describes himself as having the biggest ego this side of Alucard) is that it feels more like 'the real deal'. If someone is nice to anyone, and then he's nice to you, it doesn't feel as special, but if someone cherishes you, but generally approaches people the same way Yahtzee does Jrpgs, it feels more ... like something special. (but that may just be me of course)

 

[Radelaide]

In the end the males who can be "manly" and "sweet" at the right times with the right intensity are the most successful.

Wow, that's a good answer.

Because it's true

 

[Citizen.Erased]

Can't I have both? Can't my man cook me dinner and then go fix the shed or something?

I'd actually just prefer a "manly" man, whatever that means. I'm not too good with overly affectionate gestures and I don't reciprocate very well so I just feel guilty when it happens.

 

[Chunko]

*cough [small]objectification of women[/small] *cough cough

*cough [small]throwing around terms you don't understand[/small] *cough cough

I know what the term means, but in retrospect maybe I misinterpreted the op.

 

[Lord Beautiful]

Girls want assholes.

Plain and simple.

 

[WanderingBiscuits]

I'm extremely skinny and wouldn't call myself particularly manly

...but i do alright. Depends on what type of girl it is tbh.

Generally as a rule of thumb though, Most girls i know say they want a sweet guy and then they chase the dickhead with an overinflated ego.

 

[ZephrC]

*cough [small]objectification of women[/small] *cough cough

*cough [small]throwing around terms you don't understand[/small] *cough cough

I know what the term means, but in retrospect maybe I misinterpreted the op.

Fair enough.