I think the "females in video games" debate would be less of a problem if we had more female game developers. When the devs are male, they're generally going to make either what they want in females or what they think females are like; in Opposite World where all devs are female, the guys all look like Jensen Ackles and are either knights in shining armor (with no personality traits) or wife-beaters (with no GOOD personality traits). I'm exaggerating, of course, because there are some very genuinely good female characters in games. They just aren't the norm, and I think part of that is due to the fact that it takes an excellent writer to get into the head of something you have no personal experience in, and for most people, the opposite gender in society is about as far from personal experience as you can get.
More on topic: would I say big breasts in games offend me? No, I wouldn't say that. Lulu is my second favorite character in FFX (at least, as much "character" as any of them had in that game, walking tropes that they all were), and I actually liked her dress for a mage class. What does offend me, as a heterosexual female, is when a woman is thrown into the story "because we need a female", and you can tell she's there for that reason because her biggest contribution to the main team is either to get kidnapped or to agree with the menfolk, all while standing around and having breasts. It really comes off as, "The feminists will have a fit if we don't have a girl around, but, uh, I can't think of anything females are good at except getting in the way or sex, so..." It doesn't matter if that wasn't the intention.
Related to this, since I've seen a lot of people talking about impractical costumes in fighting and war games for the token female characters: it makes no sense to me, on a practical level, why they would put female soldiers in high heels in combat. Wearing high heels for a long period of time (nothing else for months, for example) while engaging in strenuous activity (like fighting or running around rough terrain) is a medically guaranteed way to destroy the muscles and bones in your feet, as well as mess up your calves, hips, and lower back. Six straight months of that and those women would be discharged because they would no longer be physically fit for combat. Or maybe that's the point?