Poll: Supervillainy and your minions

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Saladfork

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Jul 3, 2011
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At last, the time has come to take your revenge/get rich/rule the world! Very few things can stand agianst you now.

Unfortunately, those few things also happen to be the people most capable and willing to stop you. Yes, those superheroes can be quite a joy-killing bunch. You may or may not be able to take one or two of them in a straight-up fight, but either way, you're more than likely going to need minions to do your bidding.

What kind of minions do you create for youself? How do you use them?

Employed thugs: Not the most exciting route, but a group of human beings are undoubtably a more intelligent group than a group of zombies or robots. You can equip them however you choose, but remember that their loyalty is directly related to their pay. These guys would be unlikely to die for you.

Cultists: You create a cult that worships you as a sort of god among men. Like the thugs, they can be equipped however you choose, but with the added bonus of being completely and solely loyal to you. Keep in mind, though, that highly controlling religions are typically resistant to change, so if you wish to use your cultists for a purpose that you didn't anticipate when you created it, you may have some difficulty.

Robots: Your technical expertise allows you to create robots. You can choose what kind of armour, weaponry and other tools that are built into them, but they're stuck with it afterward unless you personally retrofit something onto them. Robots are difficult to destroy, and obviously completely loyal. Their weaknessess include a lack of intelligence (they can only react to things their programmer could have anticipated) and a lack of humanity, making it easier for your enemies to destroy them guilt-free.

Zombies: You reanimate the dead to serve you. Zombies are completely loyal and easy to control, deceptively strong, and you can raise a veritable horde of them if you need to (and have some corpses available, of course). Zombies are even less intelligent than robots, however, and while you can direct them to guard an area or to kill a person, their tactics will invariably be to swarm the enemy and beat them to death.

Demons: You can summon demons to serve you. Demons are intelligent, powerful fire-based beings that revil in their sadism. Demons are not fond at all of using human-developed technology, and will generally rely on infernal swords, brute strength and their fire magics. Demons are not loyal to you at all, and more than likely hate you with a firey passion. They are compelled to serve you by the same means that you used to summon them, but if they can find some kind of loophole to undermine you, they will take it, even if it means aiding a superhero in some way.

Animated inanimate objects (A.I.O.): Through some means that are up to you, you can animate minions made of inanimate objects, such as sand. The maximum size of minion you can create in this way is about the size of an elephant, and you can only control so many such minions at once (exact number is up to debate, but don't go crazy on this front). You can also create beings such as an elemental out of water or fire. These minions are not intelligent at all, but can understand any simple order you give them.

Beasts: The animals of the world shall do your bidding. If you don't see the appeal of using a bear to rob a bank, you may be dead inside (in which case, get off the internet and get back to work, zombie). You can give animals a task, but once that task is done, they may not report back to you, so you'll probably have to keep looking for more animals. The creatures keep whatever intelligence they had before, which is obviously sub-human, but usually higher than a zombie or robot.

You want something done right, do it yourself.: You believe that allowing anybody but yourself to participate in your villainy will result in more harm to your cause than it would help. This will keep anyone from talking, of course, and if anybody leaves any kind of evidence at a scene of your crimes, the only person to blame will be yourself. On the other hand, you will have to do everything yourself, making it logistically impossible to implement a variety of possible strategies to achieve your goals.
 

Redlin5_v1legacy

Better Red than Dead
Aug 5, 2009
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Got to go with the demons. This is why I studied demonology in university dammit! No loopholes, only fire. Plus if the hero gets through all of them, his/her party should be sufficiently thinned out enough to deal with myself. A FLAWLESS PLAN!

Now where did I leave my tome full of all the enchantments? On the tenth floor, lightly defended or behind me where it would be intelligent? Hmmmm....
 

mParadox

Susurration
Sep 19, 2010
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Demons, mate. All the way.

They listen to you, make good tea, kick bad ass, tuck you in nice and cozy! :3
 

gigastrike

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Jul 13, 2008
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Robots. If you're going to have an army that obeys your every will, they'd better not have any will of their own.
 

MammothBlade

It's not that I LIKE you b-baka!
Oct 12, 2011
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Demons. I will make them fear me whilst rewarding them with souls. If they step out of line, I will punish them most severely. Bwahahaha! All the while, I will not let them form any sort of trade unions or power bases.
 

Crazy_Dude

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Nov 3, 2010
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Mutated Honey Badgers. They are seriously bad ass but still a tad small make them the size of cows and the world shall be doomed.
 

DoPo

"You're not cleared for that."
Jan 30, 2012
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It was fairly close between robots and demons. I had to go with demons, partly because it seems cooler (ehm, pun not intended).

Now, my take on the options as a supervillain:


Employed thugs: they cost a lot, if you want them to be a significant force, and the more they are the harder they would be to manage. On top of this, the thugs are likely to be stronger than your average human on the street but that's not really useful, as the police (for example) would be at least a match. The military would be an overkill.

Cultists: Take thugs, now remove the pay and make them slightly easier to manage. Oh, and don't forget to remove their strength. An even worse idea than thugs, if you ask me, the cultists are the average people on the street, if not worse off (they had to join the cult for something

Robots: Ohh, so much potential. Top spot, if you ask me. just make them explode and leak radioactivity when destroyed and after several waves of that, the heroes will be fighting off cancer as well as robots. Also, they are immune to poisons and such, so they can shoot and hide behind poisonous smoke (for example).

Zombies: Meh. They are overrated. You'll need lots and lots of fresh recruits, because the old ones (several days old) would just rot and be unusable. Also, they are probably the easiest to defend against.

Demons: I love that! Well, aside from the fact that they'd happily burn be to a crisp if they have the chance, there isn't much of a drawback.

Animated inanimate objects (A.I.O.): It could work or it could not. It really depends on the specifics. At any rate, the limit of intelligence and number of them means htat they would be harder to use for world domination. Harder than zombies, even.

Beasts: The humans have spent so much time eveolving and advancing to be better than animals, and now I'm going to use...animals against them? No, thanks, I'll pass. Sure, I can rob a bank or two using a bear, and maybe assassinate several people but, one, once the rest of the world catches up, they'd just need to get some guns, two, I'd be considered the saddest supervillain ever. I mean, I can practically imagine the PETA related jokes everybody will be tossing at me.

You want something done right, do it yourself.: Harder for world domination. Harder for city domination, too.
 

Shock and Awe

Winter is Coming
Sep 6, 2008
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1. Make a cult

2. Train the cultists to be competent soldiers

3. ?????

4. WORLD DOMINATION
 

Saladfork

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Jul 3, 2011
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I'm honestly rather surprised at the popularity of the demons. I mean, they'd be constantly undermining you every chance they got.
 

Scarim Coral

Jumped the ship
Legacy
Oct 29, 2010
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I'm going with the hired thugs. Consider that the recession is still around, I will have thousand upon thousand of minions! However I need to make millions of cash to pay them first...
 

Black Arrow Officer

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Jun 20, 2011
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If I can pay all of my men enough, then I would definitely go for hired thugs. Those guys can be remarkably brutal if I train them to avoid dumb mook tropes. I could probably hire ex-seals or something, those guys are fucking hardcore.
 

Erana

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Feb 28, 2008
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I'd have cute animals be my minions. After all, I wouldn't be out there for a power lust, I'd just arrange things to be in my favor, hang up my supervillian cape and call it a day.

A blue jay isn't going to infect you with zombification, its not going to beat you up for money, its not going to steal your soul. Birds and rabbits and squirrels, at their happiest would have a nice place to live and walnuts. Its not in their nature to turn on you when your guard is down.

Not to mention, they are everywhere. Rats, kitties, seagulls... Impossible to genocide, suited to every terrain, and capable of incredible feats of stealth.

Sure, I'd prolly have a few armored moose or something to do my bidding when I needed some big guns, but yeah. I'd be like Snow White, but with a legion of adorable minions doing whatever the Hell I wanted.
And no singing. That's just silly.
 

Ordinaryundone

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Oct 23, 2010
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Saladfork said:
I'm honestly rather surprised at the popularity of the demons. I mean, they'd be constantly undermining you every chance they got.
Agreed, Demons are the worst sort of henchmen because every single one is a Starscream waiting to happen. You simply can't trust them, as you can't dominate them or coerce them with something like money. They may be powerful, but honestly, powerful minions aren't always a good thing if they have a will of their own.

I'd go with Cultists. Intelligent and customizable like thugs, but without the pesky loyalty and paycheck issues. Plus, having minions who are perfectly willing to do ANYTHING for you, even die messily in some horrible experiment/magic sacrifice is a very useful resource to have. Most of the more succesful "Controller" villains I can think of run at the top of an army of cultists (Ra's Al Ghul, Darkseid, etc.).

And why no option for a PMC or legitimate army? Or was the Thug/Goon option supposed to include that?
 

OctoH

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Feb 14, 2011
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I go solo. Or I hang out with my best buddies to form the Quintet of Evil. Also acceptable.
 

Daverson

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Nov 17, 2009
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Erm... Orcs? Or are we on budget minions these days?

You can't go wrong with Orcs. Especially considering they consider the job itself payment. Assuming you just need fightin' done, that is. I don't imagine Orcs would be very good at any other sort of minion work. Especially HR. In fact, now that I think about it, I don't think you could get anything worse than an Orc for HR.

(I voted cultists, ideally though, a small, organised group of like minded individuals. Mooks are just kinda crap, you know?)