Poll: What do you consider a "friend"?

[Jumplion]

So, an interesting conversation occurred with me and a friend. I personally don't feel that I have too many friends (though the ones I do have I have a great time with), and I wished that I could go out and get to know more people and generally make some genuine friends. My friend, however, noted that my personal definition of "friend" or "friendship" is very old fashioned, as I really like to know someone before I truly call them my friend. In this day and age, you can "friend" someone with a click of a button, and anyone you barely remember but briefly met at a reunion can just connect with you more easily and just drop by every now and again. It's less about substance with the person and more about "do you know him/her? Friend her on Facebook!" (Facebook as just an example).

So, has the word lost its meaning or has it simply shifted to accommodate the faster-paced world of today? What/when do you personally consider someone your "friend"? Do you have to go out of your way to get to know them or do you just like meeting them in the workplace and that's about it?

 

[Citizen Sane]

Ya i need to know the person. Spend time talking with them. IF i want to hang out with them outside of school, then sure ill give it a go and if i still want to hang with them then i call them my friend

 

[Kae]

I don't know any people that fit any of those options... I guess I consider a friend somebody I can actually talk to, I knew some people that I consider my friends but since I move a lot I lost contact with them, and I haven't been able to make any friends in the place I currently live at, so yeah my definition of a friend it's just somebody I can just talk to about feelings and stuff.

 

[Ham_authority95]

Someone I hang out with at a steady pace, talk about things that interest both of us, and like being around.

 

[GrizzlerBorno]

You tell me bud. I just started college and I can't seem to make friends. I mean, I meet nice people at like the dining halls and shit, hang out with them, know what they're all about. Then they go their way, I go mine.

Is that friendship? Not as I know back where I come from. It's really strange and I'm trying not to think about it too much but.....

 

[ChildofGallifrey]

According to Facebook, I have 300+ friends, but I have only 3 people that I consider real friends. I've known them all for years, we stay in contact because we genuinely care about each other and want to know what's going on in each others lives, even after I moved across the country, and they go a hundred miles out of their way to see me on the rare occasions that I go home (I do likewise, it's not a one-sided thing).

They've never lied to me, or tried to deceive me for personal gain (like someone I once considered my best friend did...repeatedly). I know that I could trust them with anything, whether it's a task or just keeping something I tell them in confidence if I ask it. After 7 years they've never wronged me in any way, and have done more for me than anyone I've ever known (with the exception of my parents). They've earned my deepest love and respect, and there is next to nothing that I wouldn't do for them.

That is what I consider a friend.

 

[pppppppppppppppppp]

Friendship is just a word, like marriage or art; you shouldn't put too much value in the definition.

I hang out with/talk to a good number of people, but I don't see a line between friends and non-friends. They're just people I enjoy the company of in varying degrees.

 

[CannibalCorpses]

It's about mutual respect for me.

You don't need to see a person very often to call them friends, you just need to give a shit about their well-being and vice-versa. I let my old school mate stay at my home for 9 months when the shit hit the fan in his life. He did the same for me 5 years ago in similar circumstances. I didn't need to ask him for help, he just offered when i told him my situation, and i returned the favour in the same way. That for someone that i've met up with maybe 20 times in the 5 year gap.

My real friends are closer to me than my family and i tell them things i would tell no-one else. If they are hurting or in need of help i will help them, guide them and assist them. I don't 'expect' them to return the favour, i 'know' they will want to help.

Enjoying each others company is important but also the ability to disagree with each other and still remain friendly. My friends piss me off quite frequently but i love them all to bits and wouldn't change that one bit.

awwwww

 

[GudangGaram]

Friendship is just a word, like marriage or art; you shouldn't put too much value in the definition.

Basicly this. Depending on the definition, I could have two friends, or twelve. Thirty if I count 'people I meet for drinks and a good time. Threehundred (plus) if I count facebook.

For the poll, I picked "Someone I hang out with frequently". Knowing someone for many years can mean nothing, and 'frequently' is just above just 'outside school/work'. Personally, I'd say a friend is someone you like to spend time with, and vice versa. Someone you can talk to, have fun with, or just 'be' with. Someone you help and someone who helps you, in times of despair. Frequency doesnt even really matter to me (I only see my best friend 5 to 6 times a year).