Poll: Worst book thread; basically a thread where I rant about a book my friend is reading with a footnote

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Logiclul

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Sep 18, 2011
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Backstory:

I am a High School student, I'm 17, and I have a great life... so does my friend. So you would think to yourself, "well, these children don't need to read shit, as they have no reason to find arbitrary things to relate to", but that just isn't true.

My friend is reading books about talking cats. No I'm not joking, and the book is fucking retarded as all hell. First off, THE BOOK DOESN'T EVEN NEED TO HAVE CATS. They could take out all the cats (which is pretty much everything) and change it to humans and the PLOT WOULD STILL WORK. But the whole thing the book is about (CATS) only exists to support itself, it doesn't add to anything except itself. It's terrible.

I just can't get over how bad it really is; he doesn't even read the damn book either, he skims to the dialogue parts. We're in High School, if you're going to read an awful book, you may as well actually read it instead of insulting your own intelligence further. Oh, and it is a SERIES. Yep, the author felt that the concept was SO GREAT, that it warranted an entire series of over a halfdozen books. I want to murder my neighbors cat because that's really the only thing that I can relate the cat book to.

Oh, and now I hear about a book he's reading about TALKING DRAGONS. I mean, okay I guess those books actually have some sort of essential purpose to having dragons instead of people, but it still confuses me how he has some sort of talking animal fetish. I don't have any problem with him reading what he likes, I just hate the books he happens to read, and I'm ranting about how awful they are.

Fuck.

Oh, and uh... footnote says that you can talk about some awful book you or someone you know is reading... but please don't talk about Twilight that much, we already know it is awful.
 

Sparrow

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Feb 22, 2009
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So you hate a book because it has cats instead of humans? What if you reverse that logic?

"Man, all those damn humans in Harry Potter. You could have replaced every character with horses and the PLOT WOULD STILL WORK."
 

the spud

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May 2, 2011
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LOL wut? Who gives a fuck what he is reading? Just because it is rather fanciful and surreal doesn't mean it's for children, or "retarded", as you so elegantly put it. Don't really see what the big deal is...

OT: I don't read a whole lot, and I may get some flak from people who actually know a good book when they see one, but we had to read "The Scarlet Letter" in school and it was torure.

Edit: I think I found the book series he was talking about Here it is. According to wikipedia it has won at least some level of recognition.
 

Logiclul

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Sep 18, 2011
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Guys... basic book structure works like this:

Plot
Character
Character development

Now, the plot of most books is pretty basic to where it doesn't 'make' the book. This book is rather generic in plot. Books that are like that have to have something else (harry potter has the magic world which is unique), this book has cats for characters. The thing that makes this book different from others doesn't even need to be in the book. It doesn't add ANYTHING.

edit: he told me it's the warrior books. Has a cat on the cover (lol).
 

ediblemitten

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Mar 20, 2011
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Either you're trolling or just being a douchebag who really needs to lighten up. So the guy reads two books on talking animals, suddenly hes got a fetish, and suddenly he's an idiot? Get over yourself.

Also, I almost cannot get over how incomprehensibly stupid your logic is in the first paragraph. "I have great life, thus reading books with arbitrary symbolism is above me. Obviously, I should only read 100% literal books with no symbolism and no characters besides humans, as apparently willing suspension of disbelief is a foreign concept to me."
 

Logiclul

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Sep 18, 2011
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THE CATS DONT SYMBOLIZE ANYTHING.

THAT'S WHAT I'M TRYING TO TELL YOU

I don't think any less of my friend; the idiot and fetish comments was just me joking to him.
 

Something Amyss

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Dec 3, 2008
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Sparrow said:
So you hate a book because it has cats instead of humans? What if you reverse that logic?

"Man, all those damn humans in Harry Potter. You could have replaced every character with horses and the PLOT WOULD STILL WORK."
Don't be silly. Horses can't hold wands.

>.>
 

The Bucket

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May 4, 2010
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Sparrow said:
So you hate a book because it has cats instead of humans? What if you reverse that logic?

"Man, all those damn humans in Harry Potter. You could have replaced every character with horses and the PLOT WOULD STILL WORK."
I disagree. It would work far better with horses. Imagine a horse on a broomstick, it'd be awesome.
 

Kahunaburger

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May 6, 2011
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What, like Watership Down with cats? Oh no, literature is dead!

...wait, never mind. It died when John Ringo wrote Paladin of Shadows.
 

Jubbert

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Apr 3, 2010
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Who cares about what books he reads? It's not your problem if he reads books that are in your opinion bad.

Deal with it.
 

SckizoBoy

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Jan 6, 2011
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A Hermit's Cave
Logiclul said:
Oh, and now I hear about a book he's reading about TALKING DRAGONS. I mean, okay I guess those books actually have some sort of essential purpose to having dragons instead of people, but it still confuses me how he has some sort of talking animal fetish. I don't have any problem with him reading what he likes, I just hate the books he happens to read, and I'm ranting about how awful they are.
If you're talking about Temeraire (aka His Majesty's Dragon) and that series, I may have to hurt you...

OT: And the problem with anthropomorphising a species as a substitute for humans being??

I'm sure there've been a multitude of books about futuristic species and their societies, the only difference being that there's no specific mention of them being human or alien, hence the automatic assumption that they are humans with human perceptions/traits/characteristics/etc.

Fantasy is not immune from this conceptualisation and honestly, what is wrong with it? It is the work of imagination and if you're friend so desires to indulge in it, why stop him? (That is, of course, unless he starts going around talking to cats and sincerely expecting a response.) Anyway, it's like any other fantasy species... they are basically human, just with different physical features (sure they have their origins in folklore, but are elves/dwarves/orcs/goblins etc. any different from humans except physically?).

And if that pisses you off, don't read Twisted Metal or any of Tony Ballantyne's other stuff, 'cos you'd probably go apoplectic when the humans you so envisage have been replaced by characters that aren't even organic!
 

Something Amyss

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Dec 3, 2008
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Logiclul said:
THE CATS DONT SYMBOLIZE ANYTHING.

THAT'S WHAT I'M TRYING TO TELL YOU

I don't think any less of my friend; the idiot and fetish comments was just me joking to him.
So what was the book? Let some of the rest of us judge whether or not they are symbolic. Or have some basis on which to interpret this beyond "FUCK THIS SUCKS!"
 

Exterminas

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Sep 22, 2009
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In this day and age it doesn't matter what kind of book he is reading, as long as he is reading.

The ability to read in a fast and efficient manner is a dying art form that makes studying for any form of advanced profression vastly easier.

So yeah, why don't you sharpen your brain with literature about talking cats?
 

dogenzakaminion

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Jun 15, 2010
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Um...ok. You don't like it so don't read it.

I've alienated all my friends by having started to read The Odyssey by Homer (Oxford Classic prose version), which i love so far, and my friends are reading the usual modern fantasy literature which I don't like. I don't care, we just talk about something else:)
 

Thistlehart

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Nov 10, 2010
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Dude, chill.

Does it really matter what your friend enjoys reading? Are you having to read these in order to have a conversation with him?

Reading between the lines a bit here. Are you concerned about what others may think of you based on what he's reading? Are you uncomfortable associating with a guy that reads books about talking cats and dragons? Raising this much of a stink about something like this, are you even really this guy's friend?

Just a few things for you to ponder.
 

Embz

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Mar 17, 2010
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Could possibly be the Warriors series of books?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Warriors_(novel_series)
 

2fish

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Sep 10, 2008
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Skip to number 3 if you want to be mean
1. What color are the cats and to they lick themselves?
2. It seems your caps lock or you shift key is having issues
3. Read an even worse book to get back at him maybe twilight?
4. God I love numbered lists
5. Sorry I cannot end my lists on an even number

Um maybe relax and ignore the book or unfriend him on facebook.

Zachary Amaranth said:
Don't be silly. Horses can't hold wands.

>.>
You have challenged chaos... do you know the evil you have unleashed? Speaking in these words of can't.... the horrors you have summoned.