Poll: Would you drive across Africa for $1 million?

[jumjalalabash]

Deadly and/or poisonous wildlife. Natives who are either at civil war constantly or have massive hatred toward foreigners. And a climate if I wanted to feel I would just walk outside. Ya fuck that noise. Africa is a lot more dangerous then idealists want to believe.

 

[Brawndo]

My opinion has somewhat been coloured by Top gear's many road adventures where middle aged emphysemic motoring journalists are somehow able to make these incredible road adventures with often the least suited vehicles yet with remarkable ease.

( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_cases_of_penis_removal ).

I'm not clicking that link.

The first thing that came to my head was the many adventures of Clarkson and his gang. I would so want to see this as an special for Top Gear,

There is an episode like this. They drive a 1980s Mercedes and a Soviet-bloc 4-door across like 1000 miles. It's a hilarious episode. My favorite bit is when the Mercedes tries to ford a river and floods, and local Africans shoot a hole in the bottom with an AK-47 to drain the water


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Top_Gear:_Botswana_Special

 

[ZeroMachine]

Really, really quickly.

 

[Vonnis]

The climate alone would do me in, so that's a hell no. I would've died from the heat long before meeting any hostile militiamen or what have you.

 

[Typecast]

What if I take the 10,000 hire a hercules transport to fly me from on side to the other? and just drive into cape town...

 

[QuantumT]

1. Accept this mission
2. Drive for a couple of hours (sight-seeing)
3. give up
4. $10.000 profit

This would definitely be the route I would go. Might not get the million, but it's also easy and safe.

 

[Vykrel]

depends on why that exact route was chosen. is it going through dangerous areas? i probably wouldnt do it. it doesnt seem worth the risk.

also, i dont know how to drive

 

[Sparkytheyetti]

The congo alone is almost always at war. i say screw that.

 

[TheEldestScroll]

i'd do it. i'd carry a silenced m4 with an interchangeable scope, and 30 days worth of ammunition and food? i think i'd be pretty set. also with ak-47s going for five USD in those third world countries, i'd bet i can think of some way to get a more concealed weapon for the right occasion. although i'd probably not know who to bring. probably my older cousin who is a marine.

i'd probably mix it up a bit too. like i have to find and destroy some kind of hidden weapon's cache in sudan or i get paid half.

 

[emeraldrafael]

You're taking me through some of the most dangerous countries in Africa fora million dollars? and saying that french is the best when really that would only help if you're in the norther part?

..

You know what, alright. if I can attach a mini cannon (edit, no, just the mini cannon. the howitzer would make driving unnecessarily difficult) to my truck, I would. I'll take my friend Andrew. He's French Canadian, so he knows French, English, Spanish, and some Arabic. He's grown up in the wild north, while I've grown up in the Forests of the Ohio Valley. Between the two of us, we'll be just fine. he'll, I'll even split the money fifty fifty with him (unless he's also getting his own 1 mil.)

 

[crudus]

Honestly, as long as I didn't cross any rivers (without a bridge) I don't see any dangers. As long as I plan everything well enough I should be fine.

 

[theultimateend]

My opinion has somewhat been coloured by Top gear's many road adventures where middle aged emphysemic motoring journalists are somehow able to make these incredible road adventures with often the least suited vehicles yet with remarkable ease.

( http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_cases_of_penis_removal ).

I'm not clicking that link.

Spoiler .

There are no images and almost all of like 200 incidents are in China.

Apparently every woman and her neighbor is cutting off penises :/. (I am being hyperbolic, but it is a HUGE % on that chart...)

But yeah, I'm sure any other human being would be fine. I just KNOW something would try to kill me.

Hypochondria but almost entirely human centric.

Put me around cobras and I'm not too bad emotionally.

 

[JaceArveduin]

Do you really think if you just drive through Africa black people will kidnap and torture you for no reason at all?

You are given a good vehicle that's loaded with good food, clean water, gas, and some weaponry. I'm pretty sure that's plenty of reason for most militants to "confiscate" your stuff.

 

[Flailing Escapist]

I'm fairly certain that the United States is a bit (a lot) smaller than Africa but I'll be damned if I can drive from coast to coast with a buddy in under 5 days. So 30 days worth of food and supplies and we're set!

And I can climb to the top of Pikes Peak and back in a day so I'm not too worried about how physically fit I am. But I'm not a long distance runner so hopefully we won't have to outrun any angry native inhabitants.

I can't speak French but I can understand and speak Spanish. I'm not sure if that would help at all... probably not actually.

But I can't help but think this is all a bit too easy. We get satellite phones and a gps? Just a map and a compass would be good enough for most other places.

Not to mention that we get airlifted out of there if we quit or anything bad were to happen so we're not in a lot of danger either.

And $10,000 is probably more than you need for gas in Africa but I wouldn't know.

Anyway, I most would definately do it. BRING IT ON, AFRICA!

 

[Flailing Escapist]

Man if it's anything like Far Cry 2 I'd do it. Minus the malaria of course.

Even when all the natives drop everything they're doing and chase down you as soon as they see you?

What if your gun jams!!

Edit: And what if your buddy falls over?!! Gun or medicine?!

 

[doggie135]

Yeah, why not?

It'd be fantastic fun, even if I didn't get the million!



Even if I run the risk of death...

 

[Flailing Escapist]

Man if it's anything like Far Cry 2 I'd do it. Minus the malaria of course.

Even when all the natives drop everything they're doing and chase down you as soon as they see you?

What if your gun jams!!

Edit: And what if your buddy falls over?!! Gun or medicine?!

Hell, it's more interesting than current life, and I get paid a cool mil.
And fuck those buddies, they're useless in game, they'll be useless in real life.

Damn.
Well, I suppose if everything goes to shit you could always gently toss a molotov into the grass and enjoy the lovely fire effects. B^)
Or you'll bump into some asshole trying to explain the definition of insanity and then everybodys fucked.