Poll: Would You Rather Burn To Death or Be Eaten By Jaws?

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Scarim Coral

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Tought choices, I would to think being eaten by Jaws will be quicker than being burned alive. I mean when you compared the size of an human adult and a Great White, I would have to be biten into pieces to be swallow thus I will be dead by then. Yes I know the shark can tear me from limbs and limbs but since I will be underwater, drowning is more likely to be cause of my death aswell.
 

Eamar

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Definitely Jaws. While it would still be horrible, burning to death (as in actually being on fire, not dying from smoke inhalation in a house fire) is one of my all-time biggest fears. Plus, even if the first bite didn't kill me, it's highly likely I'd pass out from shock (happens a lot when people lose limbs etc), at which point he could dispatch me while I was unconscious.

Also, and I know this is an actual "death" thread so it's probably irrelevant, but on the off-chance that I did manage to survive/stay alive for a few days and eventually die in hospital, I'd rather live with the shark attack injuries than extensive, full-body burns.

God, this is getting dark :/
 

FPLOON

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It would be an honor to be eaten by Jaws...
Besides, if I was going to be burned to death, I should also come with a free trip into some radioactive waste...
 

shootthebandit

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Burning for a few reasons

1. Im terrified of drowning (which is by far the worst way to go) and jaws is pretty similar to that
2. Fire seems more reasonable. If a shark comes near shore people kill it because its in our territory and a threat whereas if Im in the sharks territory in the deep sea (where I quite frankly dont belong) then it is perfectly justified to eat my ass
3. Fire is a bit more practical. You are saving your family money on an expensive cremation so they can spend your life insurance enjoying themselves. You want you family to pay off all the debts and hopefully have enough for an aston martin, not pay for you to be put in a big oven
 

shootthebandit

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DementedSheep said:
I glanced at this thread title while scrolling and didn't read it properly so I initially read it as "would you rather burn to death or be eaten by Jews".
Touch call that one.
I think we are safe. I doubt human flesh is kosher
 

Leemaster777

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DME said:
I totally read the title as "Would You Rather Burn To Death or Be Eaten By Jews?" and I was going to say burned to death.
Oh thank God, I thought I was the only one who read that as the title for a second there.

But yeah, gotta go with Jaws. Burning alive does NOT sound like a particularly nice way to go. And at least "eaten by a fucking shark" sounds like a pretty metal way to die.
 

Lilikins

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going for jaws....
Id just try to stick my head off the pier so its quick and easy on my part.

Burning to death..atleast from what Ive seen up to now..isnt on my top ten list of ways Id like to go.
 

Michael Tabbut

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May 22, 2013
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having burned myself in the past I'll take Jaws. Burns are agony and I'd rather die a quick death. Well, quicker.
 

Whispering Cynic

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I'd prefer to go out in style: I'd set my fists on fire and fight Jaws with them. Since I know what exactly is involved in burning alive, I'd never willingly choose that option.
 

Sandjube

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I am way too scared of the ocean in general, let alone the massive things in said ocean, so I would burn and sing a ditty before I put myself in there.
 

Flatfrog

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Bertylicious said:
Johnny Novgorod said:
If you know-who's-death death scene in Deep Blue Sea is anything to go by, getting eaten by a shark seems like an insta-kill.
Also, I've always wondered where does Jaws get his name? I know the movie's called Jaws but nobody ever calls it that. Is it a fan nickname or something from the sequels?
I suspects it's sort of a play on words referencing 'jaws of death' or somesuch. I guess they rejected "Big Scary Fish" as a title.
The title came from the book first. From Wikipedia:

The title was not decided until shortly before the book went to print. Benchley says that he had spent months thinking of titles, many of which he calls "pretentious", such as The Stillness in the Water and Leviathan Rising. Benchley regarded other ideas, such as The Jaws of Death and The Jaws of Leviathan, as "melodramatic, weird or pretentious". According to Benchley, the novel still did not have a title until twenty minutes before production of the book. The writer discussed the problem with editor Tom Congdon at a restaurant in New York.

We cannot agree on a word that we like, let alone a title that we like. In fact, the only word that even means anything, that even says anything, is "jaws". Call the book Jaws. He said "What does it mean?" I said, "I don't know, but it's short; it fits on a jacket, and it may work." He said, "Okay, we'll call the thing Jaws.
 

Johnny Novgorod

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Bertylicious said:
Johnny Novgorod said:
If you know-who's-death death scene in Deep Blue Sea is anything to go by, getting eaten by a shark seems like an insta-kill.
Also, I've always wondered where does Jaws get his name? I know the movie's called Jaws but nobody ever calls it that. Is it a fan nickname or something from the sequels?
I suspects it's sort of a play on words referencing 'jaws of death' or somesuch. I guess they rejected "Big Scary Fish" as a title.
I know the reason for titling the movie so, but I don't know at what point and why did people start calling the shark that.
 

Auron225

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Not that getting eaten by a massive shark would be in any way pleasant, but I think burning to death may be slower. With Jaws I can at least hope he'll bite through my head or my heart and that'll be it.

However...

RJ 17 said:
You know that in that water is a massive, man-eating shark that set you on fire specifically to get you to jump into the water so it could eat you.
So Jaws managed to start the inferno in the first place, inciting me to give in and let him eat me? I may choose to burn to death just to spite him :D
 

RJ 17

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Auron225 said:
RJ 17 said:
You know that in that water is a massive, man-eating shark that set you on fire specifically to get you to jump into the water so it could eat you.
So Jaws managed to start the inferno in the first place, inciting me to give in and let him eat me? I may choose to burn to death just to spite him :D
Apparently the people in the game had the same idea, because after Jaws blew up the fuel pumps they just kinda ran around a bit until they burnt to death. Meanwhile Jaws was trying to beach himself, gnashing his teeth this way and that in an attempt to get at them. :p
 

the December King

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Depends on the size of the fire.

If I'm tossed into a raging inferno or a lava cauldron, then I'll take that option.

If two nine-year olds have me tied to a post and are lighting matches around trash at my ankles, I'll go with Jaws.