Poll: You get a free wish (from an asshole genie)

[ThatLankyBastard]

"I wish that I had the ability To grant myself an unlimited amount of wishes, and the knowledge on how to use the ability effectively, producing the exact results I intended when I made the wish."

... How's that?

Captcha: Get Over It

Lol...

 

[Suicida1 Midget]

Wish One: I want something long, hard, and sandpapery, shoved up your ass.

Wish Two: A Hammer of Dawn Satillite with targeting module.

Wish Three: Undoes the damage that either one may of casued if the lolzy ideas didnt comeout just right. Otherwise since he was honest with me, i would remove wish one for him.

 

[Twilight_guy]

I wish you would go away. I don't know what he will do to mess it up but it seems like the best choice.

he sends his twin brother to be an asshole back at you

Yes, but he has to grant a wish to be an asshole and therefore I get another chance to try again.
Hooray for loopholes!

 

[CGAdam]

If I had to make a wish, I would wish for one US penny. Just a single little penny, placed on the ground in front of me. He'd have to bend the rules pretty damn far to make that one cause harm. I'd almost say you can't turn that one into something detrimental, but I wanna see if anyone here can. >)

made of urainium, keep trying

I said a simple US penny. They aren't uranium.

there is an ultra sensative landmine in front of you, the penny sets it off, hows that? and You never said made of Copper, just a US penny, wich could be interpreted as being in the exact shape of a penny, but made of a deifferent alloy

An official United States penny is never going to be made of anything other than zinc and a copper coating.

Admittedly, I didn't expect the genie to bend the rules so far as to put it on an ultra sensitive landmine.

 

[llew]

i'd ask for a really nice sandwhich, how on this planet could he fuck me with that wish?

It tastes really nice. But it's made out of the person that you care the most about in the world aside from yourself. Just a possibility I thought of.

i suppose that would work if i wasn't such a heartless bastard and didn't really care about anyone including myself :L

 

[T5seconds]

A ham sandwich. How the hell would that bite me in the arse? I just throw it away if he makes it nasty. Victory!

 

[T5seconds]

'Asshole Genie' sounds like a particularly inventive euphemism for flatulence.

*Slow clap* Quite comical, quite.

 

[MrMixelPixel]

I'd wish the genie was a normal kitten. Then... I'd have a pet kitten. I don't think there is a problem with that?


Or I could wish that the universe would blow up! How would he turn that around on me >

 

[Hagi]

Just live with the genie.

Him being a genie with magical powers I reckon he's smarter then me. The only smart thing to do would be not to try outsmart someone who's smarter then you.

Besides, an asshole genie would be pretty interesting. He's bound to have some interesting things to tell, even if they're not true.

 

[albear]

Hire a lawyer to word my wish so specifically there is no way he can turn it around.

its the theory of fighting an arsehole with an even bigger arsehole, = win

You just watched that episode of Fairly Oddparents didn't you?

OT: I originally thought this was the Jack Thompson-related thread I replied to earlier, haha.
Okay, my wish would be for him to sod off and never bother me again.


I just had kind of an epiphany, too: I'd give him a list of people, and wish him to become their genie to grant them a wish that will backfire onto them, then disappear.

I already have a bunch of people on my list: Justin Bieber, the Jersey Shore crew Jack Thompson, Rebecca Black, Stephenie Meyer, the Twilight movie crew, every single Twilight and Justin Bieber fan, every single member of the Westboro Baptist Church, Glenn Beck, Shirley Phelps...
Feel free to add more people to this list =D

I remember watching it a while back, this thread basically reminded me of that episode yeah, as im sure it did many people

 

[albear]

Hire a lawyer to word my wish so specifically there is no way he can turn it around.
its the theory of fighting an arsehole with an even bigger arsehole, = win

You can cite where you got that idea, you know. So confident you're the only one on this whole site that watched The Fairly Odd Parents, huh?

Not really, i thought those who didnt know if it was a reference to anything wouldnt care, and those who knew generally wouldnt need me pointing out where i got it from, but might smile at how fondly they remembered that episode, and also wouldnt care.

but you do seem to care and appear hurt that i havent referenced that i got the idea from 'fairy odd parents', im sorry, Hugs

 

[Irradiated Tiger]

Ignore this

 

[Irradiated Tiger]

oops double post

 

[Terminate421]

Wish for a cake on a glass platter on my table sitting 10 feet from me.

 

[Khadhar]

"I don't need a wish, I just thought you deserved to be free."

The genie is stunned, and I walk away. I continue on as normal, and the genie follows. He seems angry that I did not wish for something, but I make idle chitchat when we are alone, which is quite often. His anger eventually seems to disappear, and he starts engaging more in conversation. We begin playing games together. He warms up to me quite well, and we become good friends. Years pass, and eventually he comes to me, and says he wishes to go out and see the world, free other genies so they might know the kindness I showed him. We share goodbyes, and he vanishes.

Yeah, I can twist -your- ideas too.

 

[William Keller]

Why on earth did I pick an as***le genie in the first place?
Were this the situation, I would just wish for the genie disappearing.
Or, perhaps, losing its wish-granting powers.