Spoilers follow for the October 6th episode of Raw.
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After a flashback, Raw kicks off with Seth Rollins storming down to the ring, because he's mad. Really, really mad. He doesn't even let us here his generic theme song once he gets a mic. He goes on a tirade, but Jamie Noble and Joey Mercury come down to tell him to leave. How cool would it be if they got to wrestle another match or two? John Cena eventually comes down, making Seth Rollins flee into the crowd. But, in the crowd, he runs into Dean Ambrose, who chases Rollins back to the ring -- back to Cena. Ambrose takes out both of them. Eventually, Mercury and Noble cause enough interference to allow Rollins to escape. Then Triple H and Stephanie McMahon come out.
Triple H says it's pretty clear both Cena and Ambrose want a chance at Seth Rollins. We're getting a handicap match later tonight. Randy Orton and Kane will team with Rollins, and they'll face Cena and Ambrose. So, we've added Rollins into a match that already wasn't very good. Okay. Another flashback -- this one about Big Show and Rusev -- takes us to commercial.
Goldust, Stardust, and Cesaro vs. Dolph Ziggler and The Usos (Jimmy and Jey Uso)
Sub out Sheamus. Sub in Dolph Ziggler. We did this match two weeks ago, otherwise. The Usos work better without a third member in the party. They can put on match of the night candidates without someone else. Or, they're more likely to. Why do Ziggler and Cesaro have to be in this match? I don't know. The match is fine, but messy, and not particularly interesting. I'm bored with The Usos. I'm kind of bored with the Dust brothers. I want solo matches between Ziggler and Cesaro. Why? Watch this match. It gets good once Ziggler and Cesaro start fighting. It's dull before that. The Usos and Ziggler win after a triple superkick -- which would have gotten them disqualified in the Smackdown main event, apparently -- and a top-rope splash.
Match Rating: **1/2
Adam Rose and the Rosebuds come out with our guest hosts of the night, two people I've never before heard of, but apparently host a morning show in America. The two women get mics. They get booed by the crowd, which is great. They promote their show, and breast cancer awareness. They offer a toast to the crowd, with their ... wine? I thought we were in a PG era. One of them does a "crazy" dance. I'm so confused as to why this is getting time on live TV. Then they do the "fall of trust" onto the Rosebuds. Thank everything ever that this ends the segment.
A Luke Harper vignette is aired. I can't remember if it's the same one we've seen before. I think it was, but I can't be sure. Hopefully something comes of it soon.
Bo Dallas vs. Mark Henry
Bo Dallas beat Mark Henry last week, only to be destroyed backstage afterward. I thought it was a heel turn, but maybe it was just another step in that direction.
Mark Henry destroys Bo Dallas for a good chunk of the match. Outside the ring, so the referee started counting. Dallas slithers his way back into the ring at the count of nine and winds up picking up the countout victory. He then runs away.
Match Rating: *
Dean Ambrose comes out after the commercial break. He's mad at Cena for leaving him on Smackdown. Hey, something that happened on Smackdown matters on Raw! That's neat. He calls out Cena so they can "settle" their issue right now. Cena does just that. They tease fighting. A lot. But nothing comes of it, because why would it? Ambrose walks. He wishes Cena good luck tonight. After the commercial, we see Ambrose riding the subway. Obviously it was taped earlier, but whatever. I put the odds at 85% he comes back before the night is up.
Triple H then talks to Cena backstage. He tries to get Cena to back out of the match, or perhaps ask for the match to be 2-on-1 instead of 3-on-1. Triple H then tells Cena that he'll make sure Rollins starts the match. Okay.
Summer Rae (with Layla) vs. Brie Bella
Brie starts the match with one arm tied behind her back. Because we're mimicking the booking that happened a few months ago when Nikki Bella was being tormented by Stephanie. I don't remember this exact match happening, but that's okay. Except, instead of losing each match, Brie's going to win all of them.
Brie wins in a couple of moves here, after being dominated by Summer Rae for most of it. Nikki was watching from the stage.
Match Rating: *
we see The Miz and Damien Sandow giving Kane a fruit basket to make up for his comments last week. Kane declines. Miz is put in a match against Sheamus later.
Jack Swagger (with Zeb Colter) vs. Tyson Kidd (with Natalya)
Apparently Kidd is a heel now. A cowardly heel, even. He uses Natalya as a human shield at one point in the match. The match is actually pretty good. It's short, which isn't bad, and it's pretty technically sound. Kidd loses to the Patriot Lock, as he should, and we have the first well-booked segment of the night. Good thing we're only halfway through!
Match Rating: **1/2
A live interview with Roman Reigns is conducted next. I'm glad we did this for Daniel Bryan, too, instead of making fun of him all the time. He says nothing that you wouldn't expect. It's about two questions long. He'll be competing in some number of months. Another flashback follows, this one to Night of Champions, as WWE tries to justify throwing Cena into the Rollins/Ambrose feud.
El Torito (with Los Matadores) vs. "Mini-Gator" Hornswoggle (with Slater Gator)
This is embarrassing. Not quite as much as that guest host segment earlier, but almost as bad.
El Torito wins with a moonsault after a terrible match filled with shenanigans.
Match Rating: *
Rusev and Lana come out. They're going to address Big Show, whom Rusev was supposed to face, but since Big Show is inactive and has been given "sensitivity training," he can't compete. Despite being here tonight. So, basically, we're saving this for a PPV. It's Vladimir Putin's birthday, so we're paying tribute to him. Both of them draw major heat, which is great. Rusev eventually calls out Big Show. When Big Show doesn't come, he's called a coward, just like everyone in the audience. Tell me again how Rusev and Lana aren't over.
AND THEN THE ROCK COMES OUT! I'm not even kidding this time, like I sometimes do when I say CM Punk has returned. The Rock actually comes out. He comes down to the ring. He tells us about his day, to mad pop. Lana tells him to shut up. Rusev tells him to leave, or be crushed. Eventually, after trading back and forths, The Rock knocks Rusev out of the ring. Hopefully this leads to something, but even as a one-off, it was fun.
Alicia Fox and Paige vs. AJ Lee and Emma
Emma and Alicia work most of the match, because you don't want the two Divas who are feuding to get it all out in a random tag match. AJ gets frustrated during the match because Emma won't cover Alicia, leaving Emma to face Alicia and Paige on her own. Paige wins in a couple of moves.
Match Rating: *1/2
An Erick Rowan vignette airs. So ... so much for that Luke Harper solo push.
The Miz (with Damien Sandow) vs. Sheamus
I'm quite surprised that this wasn't a squash match. It easily could have been. But, instead, we get what's perhaps the most "wrestling" wrestling match of the night. It's not terribly exciting -- I mean, Sheamus is in the match -- but it's at least got some good action, a couple of close calls, and an absolutely hilarious Damien Sandow at ringside. Miz wins with a rollup, unfortunately, but at least most of it was in the ring and resembled an actual wrestling match.
Match Rating: **1/2
Jerry Lawler is in the ring next. He's introducing breast cancer survivors, who are seated at ringside. Good for them. I mean that sincerely. He then introduces another TV person, Joan Lunden, who is currently fighting cancer. I don't know who she is. Hopefully she survives her fight. Good luck to her. John Cena comes out and hugs her after, like she's one of his children's charity cases. Not cool.
John Cena vs. Randy Orton, Kane, and Seth Rollins
Seth Rollins does indeed start the match ... and immediately tags himself out. Kane and Orton beat Cena down before Rollins ever gets back in. Cena eventually gets some momentum going, but a big boot from Kane ends the match, because disqualifications happen that way if you're a heel.
Match Rating: *1/2
During the post-match beatdown, Dean Ambrose comes out. Told you. He's not alone, either; he has a hot dog stand with him. Orton and Kane go out to him, presumably for a hot dog. He sprays them with ketchup and mustard, and then throws the stand at them. Ambrose then assaults Rollins. More condiments and stuff get thrown around, the heels get embarrassed, and it gets really silly. Rollins eventually escapes as Ambrose and Cena stand tall in the ring.
Triple H and Stephanie then come out, even though it looked like Raw was going to be over. Triple H says they'll get the chance to face Seth Rollins, but first they'll face one another. Cena vs. Ambrose at Hell in a Cell. The winner will face Seth Rollins in a Hell in a Cell match. Ambrose hits a Dirty Deeds on Cena to end the show.
The Good: The Rock.
The Bad: Pretty much everything else.
Match of the Night: The Rock?s promo.
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After a flashback, Raw kicks off with Seth Rollins storming down to the ring, because he's mad. Really, really mad. He doesn't even let us here his generic theme song once he gets a mic. He goes on a tirade, but Jamie Noble and Joey Mercury come down to tell him to leave. How cool would it be if they got to wrestle another match or two? John Cena eventually comes down, making Seth Rollins flee into the crowd. But, in the crowd, he runs into Dean Ambrose, who chases Rollins back to the ring -- back to Cena. Ambrose takes out both of them. Eventually, Mercury and Noble cause enough interference to allow Rollins to escape. Then Triple H and Stephanie McMahon come out.
Triple H says it's pretty clear both Cena and Ambrose want a chance at Seth Rollins. We're getting a handicap match later tonight. Randy Orton and Kane will team with Rollins, and they'll face Cena and Ambrose. So, we've added Rollins into a match that already wasn't very good. Okay. Another flashback -- this one about Big Show and Rusev -- takes us to commercial.
Goldust, Stardust, and Cesaro vs. Dolph Ziggler and The Usos (Jimmy and Jey Uso)
Sub out Sheamus. Sub in Dolph Ziggler. We did this match two weeks ago, otherwise. The Usos work better without a third member in the party. They can put on match of the night candidates without someone else. Or, they're more likely to. Why do Ziggler and Cesaro have to be in this match? I don't know. The match is fine, but messy, and not particularly interesting. I'm bored with The Usos. I'm kind of bored with the Dust brothers. I want solo matches between Ziggler and Cesaro. Why? Watch this match. It gets good once Ziggler and Cesaro start fighting. It's dull before that. The Usos and Ziggler win after a triple superkick -- which would have gotten them disqualified in the Smackdown main event, apparently -- and a top-rope splash.
Match Rating: **1/2
Adam Rose and the Rosebuds come out with our guest hosts of the night, two people I've never before heard of, but apparently host a morning show in America. The two women get mics. They get booed by the crowd, which is great. They promote their show, and breast cancer awareness. They offer a toast to the crowd, with their ... wine? I thought we were in a PG era. One of them does a "crazy" dance. I'm so confused as to why this is getting time on live TV. Then they do the "fall of trust" onto the Rosebuds. Thank everything ever that this ends the segment.
A Luke Harper vignette is aired. I can't remember if it's the same one we've seen before. I think it was, but I can't be sure. Hopefully something comes of it soon.
Bo Dallas vs. Mark Henry
Bo Dallas beat Mark Henry last week, only to be destroyed backstage afterward. I thought it was a heel turn, but maybe it was just another step in that direction.
Mark Henry destroys Bo Dallas for a good chunk of the match. Outside the ring, so the referee started counting. Dallas slithers his way back into the ring at the count of nine and winds up picking up the countout victory. He then runs away.
Match Rating: *
Dean Ambrose comes out after the commercial break. He's mad at Cena for leaving him on Smackdown. Hey, something that happened on Smackdown matters on Raw! That's neat. He calls out Cena so they can "settle" their issue right now. Cena does just that. They tease fighting. A lot. But nothing comes of it, because why would it? Ambrose walks. He wishes Cena good luck tonight. After the commercial, we see Ambrose riding the subway. Obviously it was taped earlier, but whatever. I put the odds at 85% he comes back before the night is up.
Triple H then talks to Cena backstage. He tries to get Cena to back out of the match, or perhaps ask for the match to be 2-on-1 instead of 3-on-1. Triple H then tells Cena that he'll make sure Rollins starts the match. Okay.
Summer Rae (with Layla) vs. Brie Bella
Brie starts the match with one arm tied behind her back. Because we're mimicking the booking that happened a few months ago when Nikki Bella was being tormented by Stephanie. I don't remember this exact match happening, but that's okay. Except, instead of losing each match, Brie's going to win all of them.
Brie wins in a couple of moves here, after being dominated by Summer Rae for most of it. Nikki was watching from the stage.
Match Rating: *
we see The Miz and Damien Sandow giving Kane a fruit basket to make up for his comments last week. Kane declines. Miz is put in a match against Sheamus later.
Jack Swagger (with Zeb Colter) vs. Tyson Kidd (with Natalya)
Apparently Kidd is a heel now. A cowardly heel, even. He uses Natalya as a human shield at one point in the match. The match is actually pretty good. It's short, which isn't bad, and it's pretty technically sound. Kidd loses to the Patriot Lock, as he should, and we have the first well-booked segment of the night. Good thing we're only halfway through!
Match Rating: **1/2
A live interview with Roman Reigns is conducted next. I'm glad we did this for Daniel Bryan, too, instead of making fun of him all the time. He says nothing that you wouldn't expect. It's about two questions long. He'll be competing in some number of months. Another flashback follows, this one to Night of Champions, as WWE tries to justify throwing Cena into the Rollins/Ambrose feud.
El Torito (with Los Matadores) vs. "Mini-Gator" Hornswoggle (with Slater Gator)
This is embarrassing. Not quite as much as that guest host segment earlier, but almost as bad.
El Torito wins with a moonsault after a terrible match filled with shenanigans.
Match Rating: *
Rusev and Lana come out. They're going to address Big Show, whom Rusev was supposed to face, but since Big Show is inactive and has been given "sensitivity training," he can't compete. Despite being here tonight. So, basically, we're saving this for a PPV. It's Vladimir Putin's birthday, so we're paying tribute to him. Both of them draw major heat, which is great. Rusev eventually calls out Big Show. When Big Show doesn't come, he's called a coward, just like everyone in the audience. Tell me again how Rusev and Lana aren't over.
AND THEN THE ROCK COMES OUT! I'm not even kidding this time, like I sometimes do when I say CM Punk has returned. The Rock actually comes out. He comes down to the ring. He tells us about his day, to mad pop. Lana tells him to shut up. Rusev tells him to leave, or be crushed. Eventually, after trading back and forths, The Rock knocks Rusev out of the ring. Hopefully this leads to something, but even as a one-off, it was fun.
Alicia Fox and Paige vs. AJ Lee and Emma
Emma and Alicia work most of the match, because you don't want the two Divas who are feuding to get it all out in a random tag match. AJ gets frustrated during the match because Emma won't cover Alicia, leaving Emma to face Alicia and Paige on her own. Paige wins in a couple of moves.
Match Rating: *1/2
An Erick Rowan vignette airs. So ... so much for that Luke Harper solo push.
The Miz (with Damien Sandow) vs. Sheamus
I'm quite surprised that this wasn't a squash match. It easily could have been. But, instead, we get what's perhaps the most "wrestling" wrestling match of the night. It's not terribly exciting -- I mean, Sheamus is in the match -- but it's at least got some good action, a couple of close calls, and an absolutely hilarious Damien Sandow at ringside. Miz wins with a rollup, unfortunately, but at least most of it was in the ring and resembled an actual wrestling match.
Match Rating: **1/2
Jerry Lawler is in the ring next. He's introducing breast cancer survivors, who are seated at ringside. Good for them. I mean that sincerely. He then introduces another TV person, Joan Lunden, who is currently fighting cancer. I don't know who she is. Hopefully she survives her fight. Good luck to her. John Cena comes out and hugs her after, like she's one of his children's charity cases. Not cool.
John Cena vs. Randy Orton, Kane, and Seth Rollins
Seth Rollins does indeed start the match ... and immediately tags himself out. Kane and Orton beat Cena down before Rollins ever gets back in. Cena eventually gets some momentum going, but a big boot from Kane ends the match, because disqualifications happen that way if you're a heel.
Match Rating: *1/2
During the post-match beatdown, Dean Ambrose comes out. Told you. He's not alone, either; he has a hot dog stand with him. Orton and Kane go out to him, presumably for a hot dog. He sprays them with ketchup and mustard, and then throws the stand at them. Ambrose then assaults Rollins. More condiments and stuff get thrown around, the heels get embarrassed, and it gets really silly. Rollins eventually escapes as Ambrose and Cena stand tall in the ring.
Triple H and Stephanie then come out, even though it looked like Raw was going to be over. Triple H says they'll get the chance to face Seth Rollins, but first they'll face one another. Cena vs. Ambrose at Hell in a Cell. The winner will face Seth Rollins in a Hell in a Cell match. Ambrose hits a Dirty Deeds on Cena to end the show.
The Good: The Rock.
The Bad: Pretty much everything else.
Match of the Night: The Rock?s promo.
<color=D6D9DA>_________________________________________________________________________________
If you wish to be notified whenever I post something new, please join this <url=http://www.escapistmagazine.com/groups/view/2-50-Reviews>user group.
For an archive of all my previous WWE reviews, please go <url=http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/326.846764-Marters-WWE-Reviews-Archive>here.
Talk to me on the Twitter, <url=https://twitter.com/martertweet>@martertweet.
