Reasons why Oblvion is better than real life

[Dogstile]

i can't believe nobody has said this

YOU CAN RIDE UNICORNS!

 

[Clashero]

You can kick the shit out of some people and they will never die. You can keep going back for more.

This, so much this. I love punching someone in the face and then yielding.

Yerr, bit strange though, you can stab someone in the face with some big hell sword, but as soon as you put up your sheild, and I dunno, I think you shout "NO" or something, they are all matey with you.

There a lot of things about the game that become really strange when you think about it for a few seconds. Like the fact that if you have collected 8 potatoes and stolen 2 potatoes, a merchant will only buy the 8 potatoes you got legally. I guess stolen items are really obvious in this world.
To say nothing of the psychic guards, who chase me around for months because I moved a fork.

I know how you feel. I did the same with a basket and they all started screaming "THIEF!" so I tried to throw the basket at her face. It didn't work that well. I like how you can just rip a bear's/wolf's pelt of with your bare hands as well.

Not to mention being able to rip a demon's heart, and after killing a deer, you can just rip out his raw venison, then drop it and see how perfectly cut it is. Couple this with the fact that you eat it raw and never get sick.
Speaking of getting sick: getting sick because someone who was sick as well hit me with their hammer. Priceless.
I like you. +friend

 

[bodyklok]

I like how you can just rip a bear's/wolf's pelt of with your bare hands as well.

Yeah that was pretty cool, but what got me was the fact that you could do that and the Wolf/bear/imp/whatever still looked excetly te same.

 

[hannahdonno]

You can kick the shit out of some people and they will never die. You can keep going back for more.

This, so much this. I love punching someone in the face and then yielding.

Yerr, bit strange though, you can stab someone in the face with some big hell sword, but as soon as you put up your sheild, and I dunno, I think you shout "NO" or something, they are all matey with you.

There a lot of things about the game that become really strange when you think about it for a few seconds. Like the fact that if you have collected 8 potatoes and stolen 2 potatoes, a merchant will only buy the 8 potatoes you got legally. I guess stolen items are really obvious in this world.
To say nothing of the psychic guards, who chase me around for months because I moved a fork.

I know how you feel. I did the same with a basket and they all started screaming "THIEF!" so I tried to throw the basket at her face. It didn't work that well. I like how you can just rip a bear's/wolf's pelt of with your bare hands as well.

Not to mention being able to rip a demon's heart, and after killing a deer, you can just rip out his raw venison, then drop it and see how perfectly cut it is. Couple this with the fact that you eat it raw and never get sick.
Speaking of getting sick: getting sick because someone who was sick as well hit me with their hammer. Priceless.
I like you. +friend

Thanks for the add ^^ And yer, I think you just shit out awesomeness on Oblivion tbh. Apart from you can wear body armour and clunk about sneaking without making a sound, but as soon as you put on some boots, everyone can fucking hear you. Yerr, those hammers can make you ill, but not smash your face in...

 

[hannahdonno]

I like how you can just rip a bear's/wolf's pelt of with your bare hands as well.

Yeah that was pretty cool, but what got me was the fact that you could do that and the Wolf/bear/imp/whatever still looked excetly te same.

Yerr, seeing a mutilated imp corpse would really brighten up the game.

 

[Da_Schwartz]

i can't believe nobody has said this

YOU CAN RIDE UNICORNS!

You can?..really? I know you can kill unicorns...which is pretty awesome.

 

[Jonny The Kay]

Edit: My bad I was trying to post on another forum

 

[Clashero]

You can kick the shit out of some people and they will never die. You can keep going back for more.

This, so much this. I love punching someone in the face and then yielding.

Yerr, bit strange though, you can stab someone in the face with some big hell sword, but as soon as you put up your sheild, and I dunno, I think you shout "NO" or something, they are all matey with you.

There a lot of things about the game that become really strange when you think about it for a few seconds. Like the fact that if you have collected 8 potatoes and stolen 2 potatoes, a merchant will only buy the 8 potatoes you got legally. I guess stolen items are really obvious in this world.
To say nothing of the psychic guards, who chase me around for months because I moved a fork.

I know how you feel. I did the same with a basket and they all started screaming "THIEF!" so I tried to throw the basket at her face. It didn't work that well. I like how you can just rip a bear's/wolf's pelt of with your bare hands as well.

Not to mention being able to rip a demon's heart, and after killing a deer, you can just rip out his raw venison, then drop it and see how perfectly cut it is. Couple this with the fact that you eat it raw and never get sick.
Speaking of getting sick: getting sick because someone who was sick as well hit me with their hammer. Priceless.
I like you. +friend

Thanks for the add ^^ And yer, I think you just shit out awesomeness on Oblivion tbh. Apart from you can wear body armour and clunk about sneaking without making a sound, but as soon as you put on some boots, everyone can fucking hear you. Yerr, those hammers can make you ill, but not smash your face in...

Yer, my favourite Oblivion weirdness moment came when I was just prancing about the countryside filling in the map. I went into a house and the moment I stepped out a freaking unicorn was there, waiting, facing me and ready to attack. My horse was miles away, so I fought him. "Unicorn is unconscious", the game gallantly said to me. I hadn't realized he was a Quest NPC. I take my chances and run away (I was near Chorrol at the time, so I map travelled to Cheydinhal). Would you believe that when I left the town THE FREAKING UNICORN WAS THERE. He attacked me again. Since I couldn't fight him, I ran. I couldn't map travel because I was still under attack, so I had to run. Perhaps I could've cheated, used a mod or something, but the whole situation was so hilarious that I just kept running. The Unicorn of Hell chased me through forests, mountains, hills and swamps. It followed me into an Oblivion gate. I took the Sigil Stone from the Oblivion plane and the Unicorn still hadn't had enough. I eventually went far, FAR into the mountains (the place you have to go to for the Lifting The Vale quest) and when I returned, the Unicorn was thankfully gone. 3 hours spent doing NOTHING except leveling Athletics indirectly, but the best 3 hours of my gaming life.

 

[bodyklok]

I like how you can just rip a bear's/wolf's pelt of with your bare hands as well.

Yeah that was pretty cool, but what got me was the fact that you could do that and the Wolf/bear/imp/whatever still looked excetly te same.

Yerr, seeing a mutilated imp corpse would really brighten up the game.

You ask me those Imps were born mutilated, ugly mofos.

 

[The Great JT]

Let's not forget magic. That always kicks ass.

Also, you are actually rewarded further for helping people besides that feeling of "I helped that guy."

 

[dnnydllr]

If i reallllllllly hated someone, I could whack them and then only have to lose a few skill points to be accepted by society again. =D

 

[Raddragon]

You can be a vampire.
You can have 50 arrows trough your body and still be very healthy.
You can type \kill and POOF instant death.
You can type \unlock and POOF door unlocked.
You can walk and jump on water.
You can steal stuff and murder people, and then get away with it.

You can have houses all round the world. Cheap houses. And one of them has a servant. A servant who gives you pies and wine. And you can bring over that annoying arena fanboy who looks like Link, your minion from the Dark Brotherhood and a pretty assistance of your choice from the wizards guild, and just party hard whilst eating pie and downing it with wine. Could it get any more awsome than this?

 

[vivi 50]

I would love to be able to summon demonic creatures to help me. Also killing everybody then just paying a dude n bam no more bounty

 

[hannahdonno]

You can kick the shit out of some people and they will never die. You can keep going back for more.

This, so much this. I love punching someone in the face and then yielding.

Yerr, bit strange though, you can stab someone in the face with some big hell sword, but as soon as you put up your sheild, and I dunno, I think you shout "NO" or something, they are all matey with you.

There a lot of things about the game that become really strange when you think about it for a few seconds. Like the fact that if you have collected 8 potatoes and stolen 2 potatoes, a merchant will only buy the 8 potatoes you got legally. I guess stolen items are really obvious in this world.
To say nothing of the psychic guards, who chase me around for months because I moved a fork.

I know how you feel. I did the same with a basket and they all started screaming "THIEF!" so I tried to throw the basket at her face. It didn't work that well. I like how you can just rip a bear's/wolf's pelt of with your bare hands as well.

Not to mention being able to rip a demon's heart, and after killing a deer, you can just rip out his raw venison, then drop it and see how perfectly cut it is. Couple this with the fact that you eat it raw and never get sick.
Speaking of getting sick: getting sick because someone who was sick as well hit me with their hammer. Priceless.
I like you. +friend

Thanks for the add ^^ And yer, I think you just shit out awesomeness on Oblivion tbh. Apart from you can wear body armour and clunk about sneaking without making a sound, but as soon as you put on some boots, everyone can fucking hear you. Yerr, those hammers can make you ill, but not smash your face in...

Yer, my favourite Oblivion weirdness moment came when I was just prancing about the countryside filling in the map. I went into a house and the moment I stepped out a freaking unicorn was there, waiting, facing me and ready to attack. My horse was miles away, so I fought him. "Unicorn is unconscious", the game gallantly said to me. I hadn't realized he was a Quest NPC. I take my chances and run away (I was near Chorrol at the time, so I map travelled to Cheydinhal). Would you believe that when I left the town THE FREAKING UNICORN WAS THERE. He attacked me again. Since I couldn't fight him, I ran. I couldn't map travel because I was still under attack, so I had to run. Perhaps I could've cheated, used a mod or something, but the whole situation was so hilarious that I just kept running. The Unicorn of Hell chased me through forests, mountains, hills and swamps. It followed me into an Oblivion gate. I took the Sigil Stone from the Oblivion plane and the Unicorn still hadn't had enough. I eventually went far, FAR into the mountains (the place you have to go to for the Lifting The Vale quest) and when I returned, the Unicorn was thankfully gone. 3 hours spent doing NOTHING except leveling Athletics indirectly, but the best 3 hours of my gaming life.

When it came to that quest, I couldn't ride it so I slaughtered that fucker.

 

[IxionIndustries]

Human beings are NOT the only sentient species.
You can upgrade the world according to your tastes.
You have magic.
You can actually afford items.
You can harm animals without PETA biting your rear.
You can get away with murder, and even join a club that likes that thing. (Sick fucks)
You can bribe the authorities with success.
You can drink all the alchahol and do all the skooma you like with no threat of death.
Objects DO NOT break, unless you wear them too much, and even then you can repair them to be as good as new.
You can be shot in the head, groin, heart, lung, and kidneys and still keep fighting.
You do not have to eat, drink, sleep, or use the bathroom.
You can carry an ungodly amount of crap.
Apparrently the laws of physics are messed up.
You can survive long drops from high places.
Fire doesn't burn anything but people and creatures.
You can become a vampire. (NOT the sparkly, queer ones.)
You can jump off of WATER.
Horses actually help you, even if you've stolen, injured, wronged them.
There IS other life out there. I.e; The Daedric Realms
Unicorns will let you ride them. (That's badass)
You can strip people down to their underwear by pickpocketing them. (Seriously, taking off someone's clothes while crouching behind them is really that easy?)

I will edit with more ideas.

 

[Valiance]

People maintain eye contact with you in Oblivion.

This post says so much with so little. Hilarious...

Anyway, I prefer "STOP RIGHT THERE CRIMINAL SCUM" instead of "License and registration, please."

 

[hannahdonno]

I like how you can just rip a bear's/wolf's pelt of with your bare hands as well.

Yeah that was pretty cool, but what got me was the fact that you could do that and the Wolf/bear/imp/whatever still looked excetly te same.

Yerr, seeing a mutilated imp corpse would really brighten up the game.

You ask me those Imps were born mutilated, ugly mofos.

Nothing beats that hound you get given in Shivering Isles. I got so paranoid when it followed me aorund, I never knew it was mine, but it was so disgusting I killed it anyway.

 

[hannahdonno]

Human beings are NOT the only sentient species.
You can upgrade the world according to your tastes.
You have magic.
You can actually afford items.
You can harm animals without PETA biting your rear.
You can get away with murder, and even join a club that likes that thing. (Sick fucks)
You can bribe the authorities with success.
You can drink all the alchahol and do all the skooma you like with no threat of death.
Objects DO NOT break, unless you wear them too much, and even then you can repair them to be as good as new.
You can be shot in the head, groin, heart, lung, and kidneys and still keep fighting.
You do not have to eat, drink, sleep, or use the bathroom.
You can carry an ungodly amount of crap.
Apparrently the laws of physics are messed up.
You can survive long drops from high places.
Fire doesn't burn anything but people and creatures.
You can become a vampire. (NOT the sparkly, queer ones.)
You can jump off of WATER.
Horses actually help you, even if you've stolen, injured, wronged them.
There IS other life out there. I.e; The Daedric Realms
Unicorns will let you ride them. (That's badass)

I will edit with more ideas.

Giz your horse, mine just walks away from me, no help from that fuckwit.

 

[Kogarian]

Also you got soapy tit wanks from foxy night elves.

EDIT: Don't give me that look, someone had to say it.

That...was purely awesome. Wrong game, but still funny.

You could jump and kind of levitate/move around mid-air.

 

[bodyklok]

I like how you can just rip a bear's/wolf's pelt of with your bare hands as well.

Yeah that was pretty cool, but what got me was the fact that you could do that and the Wolf/bear/imp/whatever still looked excetly te same.

Yerr, seeing a mutilated imp corpse would really brighten up the game.

You ask me those Imps were born mutilated, ugly mofos.

Nothing beats that hound you get given in Shivering Isles. I got so paranoid when it followed me aorund, I never knew it was mine, but it was so disgusting I killed it anyway.

Shivering Isles never went on PS3 (Which is what I played oblivion on) *Single tear slides down cheeck*. I have it on PC though, just never had a PC that could run it properly.