Relationships and life.

[Brimtastic]

First off, I want to apologize for wasting your time if none of this makes sense to you, the reader. I don't post much stuff. I just need to get some opinions and I find it quite difficult to articulate how I feel about this subject to friends or family. Your comments are always greatly appreciated.

Anyway, to tell you a little about myself, I am a pretty fat and ugly senior in high school. I have never had a girlfriend nor does it look that likely that I will in some time. In most other aspects of my life I feel confident in my capability. Just not this one.

I never really attempted to get a girlfriend until a year ago. Where I met a girl and I actually thought it was possible that she liked me and all that jazz (I even wrote her poems, yes it is stupid/creepy now that I look back on it, though she did like them). Only to find out she only thought of me as a "nice, funny guy"...

Now days, I am bitter towards the success of my friends and their relationships with their girlfriends. I feel cynical and cold. I have come to realization that no matter what I do/say I will always be the "fat funny guy". I find no point in "being nice" to these girls, for I will be the same thing to them no matter how I act. Right now I feel like this life I'm living in is just a joke and I'm the only one laughing...I don't want to laugh anymore.

 

[AndyFromMonday]

Ever considered changing your life style? Try loosing weight, broaden your "closet" and such?

 

[YoUnG205]

Persue a girl more aggressivly. I do not mean physicly but make sure that there is no mistake that you want to be more! just a suggestion.

 

[Cherry Cola]

Ever considered changing your life style? Try loosing weight, broaden your "closet" and such?

Was that a gay joke? I just think "gay" when I think "closet". Is there something wrong with me?

Here's the thing: You will find someone. Until then, be as cynical as you want. I don't care if you can't wait for anyone, you will have to.

Now go play video games!

 

[Azure-Supernova]

I'm not understanding the post? God, if you're this worked up by what's going on then get off your ass and do something about it. You're always gonna be the "fat funny guy" if you're just gonna sit there and take it. You need to be comfortable with yourself, when you are, then you're ready to tackle relationships.

 

[YoUnG205]

Now go play video games![/quote]

I take mine back do that lol

 

[YoUnG205]

ye do that

 

[Brimtastic]

Broaden my closet? Little confused on the meaning of that.

Yes, I have been trying to lose weight lately. Mostly just using a tredmill.

In the back of my head, I keep thinking, if one day I came into school completely skinny, how would girls in general treat me?

If they actually did want to date me, doesn't that just add to this "joke"? That all we really care about is, if we admit it or not is looks. I can't say that I'm excluded..

 

[Aardvark]

Lower your standards. Remember, there is always someone as desperate as you are ugly. And vice versa.

 

[Insanum]

Well...If your having girl troubles...try this thread; http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.117161

 

[Flare Phoenix]

So let me get this straight? You try to get one girl to like you, fail, and now you've decided to give up? If you're just going to think of yourself as fat that mentallity is going to show when you're trying to talk to a girl. Despite what some people may tell you, looks are not the most important thing to a girl. I've seen a lot of pretty good-looking guys get turned down by girls so trust me when I say it's not just you. A lot of guys, at one point or another, feel down about not having a girlfriend.

It's all about practice. You can't expect to get someone on the very first try; you have to keep at it. That girl may not have liked you that way, but there is one out there that does. If you're having problems with confidence than you should make a list of all the positive attributes (nice and funny would be on there) you can think of.

By the way, if you're really worried about the weight why don't you do something about it? At the peak of my obesity I was 145kg, but I've worked on my weight and right now I'm down to 107kg.

 

[technoted]

stuff it and get on with life, plenty more fish in the sea, so crack open a can of beer sit back, relax and go fishing, in the desert...

 

[hotdogoctopus]

Well, two things. when there's a women in your life one only runs the risk of having her destroy your heart. The other, the harsh truth, if you are in true desire to change things in your life, you should start with the health and welfare aspects of your life. Plus, it will really help a transformation if you stop with the self-hate speech. Do things, all things, to be a stronger better more productive person (for YOU and only YOU) and when you do things, be proud of what you've done. You can easily flip your situation if you want to, and if you try. And NEVER, NEVER make improvements for anyone but you. Also, be yourself, don't change what's upstair because that's really the only thing that you have. If the someone you love doesn't love the you that's inside, you shouldn't love them. Sorry for rambling.

 

[Kilowog17]

'Discover' Henry Rollins.
That worked for me.

 

[cieply]

Well here is a protip - stop being fat. Untill you are unattractive, girls that would find you interesting will find you "nice". Of course there are ways around it like NLS but that's just cheap and getting rid of fat will not only get you laid but will make you feel better about yourself. If you are funny than you are on a good way to fing a GF that way. And that is NOT that hard. I mean seriously, if you feel that bad about id and you are still not motivated enough to loose weight, than that means you are not feeling that bad about yourself at all.

 

[Ciarnyn]

I find no point in "being nice" to these girls, for I will be the same thing to them no matter how I act.

I seriously feel your pain. I'm sure there are few that don't, we all know what it's like to be alone. And I wish I could offer you some good advice, but... the same things just don't work for every person. However, this particular sentiment in your post really bothered me. What do you mean when you say "these girls"? And why wouldn't you be nice?

 

[Brimtastic]

I guess to be honest, I am a little scared to keep trying and failing. Failing that one time tore me apart and my personality changed quite a bit from it. I don't know what I would be like if I just kept failing.

My weight never really bothered me (around 250-260 pounds). It's just my friends tend to bring that up as to why I can't/won't get a girlfriend. Then I start feeling like shit.

I guess I just feel confused and lost. I just can't handle the thought of getting the same response.

 

[Flare Phoenix]

I guess to be honest, I am a little scared to keep trying and failing. Failing that one time tore me apart and my personality changed quite a bit from it. I don't know what I would be like if I just kept failing.

My weight never really bothered me (around 250-260 pounds). It's just my friends tend to bring that up as to why I can't/won't get a girlfriend. Then I start feeling like shit.

I guess I just feel confused and lost. I just can't handle the thought of getting the same response.

Dump those friends. Seriously, if someone keeps pointing out your fat they can't be a very good friend. It's complete lies too. Are these friends of yours the type that claim to be very good with women and have sex with them all the time?