Relationships vs family

[Kinokohatake]

My wife is black, my children mixed, and my family, PREEEETY racist. We only show up for big things, don't stay too long and don't really talk to anyone we don't have to. My mom claims she isn't racist, but claims racism is gone. The kind of person that thinks BET shouldn't exist and black people need no special recognition. My dad, well he is voting for Donald Trump so that should explain everything.

I dunno I get where your mom is coming from. I don't think racism is dead for obvious reasons but I do think things like BET and other special recognition shouldn't necessarily exist either. Personally I think they only serve to further push the idea that black people are different and by extension we should treat them differently. Whether that be good or bad the point is it does push for racist attitudes.

Personally I don't think racism will ever really start to disappear until we as a society let go of the concept of race both for the purposes of good and bad. Sure it would be dumb to pretend that others don't do the whole race thing but why participate in it yourself when it only serves to create segregated mind sets.


OT: My SO lives on the other side of the continent and in another country so we only get to see each other on and off. She was up here last march though and my family all liked her actually my sister liked her a lot more than my ex so that was kinda nice. Apparently she was really worried my family was going to be racist (shes "black"/ native american and we are "white") but obviously nobody gave a shit (it's Canada everyone is from everywhere and nobody gives a shit). Now it's my turn this Christmas to be there so it should be interesting to see how her parents feel about me.

But you really have to look at it from a minority view point. Do you know how many african americans have won best actor in the academy awards? 4 in the past 87 years. Leading actress? 1 in 87 years. Best director? 0. Best picture? 1. Black people generally are not given lead roles unless the film is a black film and those never win awards. Black films are also not given as much funding by execs because being a black film is a "niche market". The BET awards are channel specific so if you want to get rid of those perhaps get rid of the country music awards. Black people created their own awards shows because they weren't being recognized by the establishment and they still aren't. Go through a day imagining you are black and look at tv shows, movies, commercials, advertisements and see if your blackness is represented properly.

I notice people that generally say racism will disappear when we let go of the concept of race generally mean they want everyone to act "white" and stop reminding everyone that they are different.

 

[Lieju]

Well, I've been seeing women who were closeted to their families or didn't want to introduce a woman they were dating or even that they were friends with a lesbian so... I had to pretend to be her childhood friend from a different city. It was stressful.

So far I haven't brought any girlfriends to see my grandparents especially for... well they have opinions on the gays.
If it was serious enough I would introduce my girlfriend to them but we'd probably keep our distance.

These situations generally suck.

 

[aba1]

My wife is black, my children mixed, and my family, PREEEETY racist. We only show up for big things, don't stay too long and don't really talk to anyone we don't have to. My mom claims she isn't racist, but claims racism is gone. The kind of person that thinks BET shouldn't exist and black people need no special recognition. My dad, well he is voting for Donald Trump so that should explain everything.

I dunno I get where your mom is coming from. I don't think racism is dead for obvious reasons but I do think things like BET and other special recognition shouldn't necessarily exist either. Personally I think they only serve to further push the idea that black people are different and by extension we should treat them differently. Whether that be good or bad the point is it does push for racist attitudes.

Personally I don't think racism will ever really start to disappear until we as a society let go of the concept of race both for the purposes of good and bad. Sure it would be dumb to pretend that others don't do the whole race thing but why participate in it yourself when it only serves to create segregated mind sets.


OT: My SO lives on the other side of the continent and in another country so we only get to see each other on and off. She was up here last march though and my family all liked her actually my sister liked her a lot more than my ex so that was kinda nice. Apparently she was really worried my family was going to be racist (shes "black"/ native american and we are "white") but obviously nobody gave a shit (it's Canada everyone is from everywhere and nobody gives a shit). Now it's my turn this Christmas to be there so it should be interesting to see how her parents feel about me.

But you really have to look at it from a minority view point. Do you know how many african americans have won best actor in the academy awards? 4 in the past 87 years. Leading actress? 1 in 87 years. Best director? 0. Best picture? 1. Black people generally are not given lead roles unless the film is a black film and those never win awards. Black films are also not given as much funding by execs because being a black film is a "niche market". The BET awards are channel specific so if you want to get rid of those perhaps get rid of the country music awards. Black people created their own awards shows because they weren't being recognized by the establishment and they still aren't. Go through a day imagining you are black and look at tv shows, movies, commercials, advertisements and see if your blackness is represented properly.

I notice people that generally say racism will disappear when we let go of the concept of race generally mean they want everyone to act "white" and stop reminding everyone that they are different.

Well ya of course we are going to have less black people in western media (assuming you are talking about western media) being that they are all primarily white societies. If 1 in 10 people are "black" you aren't going to see many "black people" on tv it is simple demographics. If I went to China right now I guarantee you that everyone to tv will be Chinese for the most part. Why? because that is the demographics of the area. Even all that aside however you are actually proving my point as you go on, in that you talk about how execs view "black people" as niche. The reason the view them that way is because they view "black people" as their own group as opposed to just people and because of the demographics it is harder to make money on a smaller group of people. People all feel this need to identify with people based on perceived race and execs know this. That is why they try and have "white people" so they can appeal to the larger "white" demographic. If people just stopped bothering with all this race nonsense then they wouldn't have any reason to appeal to demographics based on race any longer and you would likely actually see more black people in media.

Also this whole white vs black culture thing is really fruitless it is all based on where people come from and the environments they live in not their perceived race. So nobody can act "white" a person from Russia is going to have a different culture than a person from Canada. Much in the same way a person from Nigeria is going to have a very different culture than someone from Trinidad. So no I don't really think anybody will act "white" what ever that means I just think they will act with influenced based on their histories something completely different than race.

 

[Kinokohatake]

My wife is black, my children mixed, and my family, PREEEETY racist. We only show up for big things, don't stay too long and don't really talk to anyone we don't have to. My mom claims she isn't racist, but claims racism is gone. The kind of person that thinks BET shouldn't exist and black people need no special recognition. My dad, well he is voting for Donald Trump so that should explain everything.

I dunno I get where your mom is coming from. I don't think racism is dead for obvious reasons but I do think things like BET and other special recognition shouldn't necessarily exist either. Personally I think they only serve to further push the idea that black people are different and by extension we should treat them differently. Whether that be good or bad the point is it does push for racist attitudes.

Personally I don't think racism will ever really start to disappear until we as a society let go of the concept of race both for the purposes of good and bad. Sure it would be dumb to pretend that others don't do the whole race thing but why participate in it yourself when it only serves to create segregated mind sets.


OT: My SO lives on the other side of the continent and in another country so we only get to see each other on and off. She was up here last march though and my family all liked her actually my sister liked her a lot more than my ex so that was kinda nice. Apparently she was really worried my family was going to be racist (shes "black"/ native american and we are "white") but obviously nobody gave a shit (it's Canada everyone is from everywhere and nobody gives a shit). Now it's my turn this Christmas to be there so it should be interesting to see how her parents feel about me.

But you really have to look at it from a minority view point. Do you know how many african americans have won best actor in the academy awards? 4 in the past 87 years. Leading actress? 1 in 87 years. Best director? 0. Best picture? 1. Black people generally are not given lead roles unless the film is a black film and those never win awards. Black films are also not given as much funding by execs because being a black film is a "niche market". The BET awards are channel specific so if you want to get rid of those perhaps get rid of the country music awards. Black people created their own awards shows because they weren't being recognized by the establishment and they still aren't. Go through a day imagining you are black and look at tv shows, movies, commercials, advertisements and see if your blackness is represented properly.

I notice people that generally say racism will disappear when we let go of the concept of race generally mean they want everyone to act "white" and stop reminding everyone that they are different.

Well ya of course we are going to have less black people in western media (assuming you are talking about western media) being that they are all primarily white societies. If 1 in 10 people are "black" you aren't going to see many "black people" on tv it is simple demographics. If I went to China right now I guarantee you that everyone to tv will be Chinese for the most part. Why? because that is the demographics of the area. Even all that aside however you are actually proving my point as you go on, in that you talk about how execs view "black people" as niche. The reason the view them that way is because they view "black people" as their own group as opposed to just people and because of the demographics it is harder to make money on a smaller group of people. People all feel this need to identify with people based on perceived race and execs know this. That is why they try and have "white people" so they can appeal to the larger "white" demographic. If people just stopped bothering with all this race nonsense then they wouldn't have any reason to appeal to demographics based on race any longer and you would likely actually see more black people in media.

Also this whole white vs black culture thing is really fruitless it is all based on where people come from and the environments they live in not their perceived race. So nobody can act "white" a person from Russia is going to have a different culture than a person from Canada. Much in the same way a person from Nigeria is going to have a very different culture than someone from Trinidad. So no I don't really think anybody will act "white" what ever that means I just think they will act with influenced based on their histories something completely different than race.

The reason these awards shows were created were because black people were and still are under represented in pop culture. Were black people supposed to just suck it up and hope and pray that one day they would get an award? No, so they made their own. And black people are still under represented in pop culture, so why should they get rid of their own awards shows?