Riddle Me This

[Kimarous]

A lark may carry it, but the strongest man might not. Of what do I speak?

 

[Lexodus]

What runs but does not walk?
What has a bed but doesn't sleep?

a river.

What are tree mistake in this sentence?

Here's one:

So ur with ur honey and yur making out wen the phone rigns. U anser it n the vioce is wut ru doing wit my daughter? U tell ur girl n she say my dad is ded. THEN WHO WAS PHONE?

The mother. Or the queen bee.

Spoiler: Wrong. There are three possible answers to this:

Spoiler: The Cleverbot answer,

Spoiler: Occum's Razor,

Spoiler: or /x/'s answer.

A homeless man is sitting on a park bench. You are jogging.
As you jog up to him, he holds his hand out and asks for change, you jog on past, pretending that you can't hear him over your iPod.

Feeling guilty, you stop. You reach into the pocket of your running shorts for a couple of bucks you were saving for a bottle of water. You turn around to jog back to the homeless man.

He is already standing right behind you. The park is suddenly abandoned. His eyes are wriggling masses of wasp larvae, he outstretches his arms, each which are 5 feet in length. His mouth opens inexplicably wide, his lower jaw touching his sternum. The only sound he emits from his gaping mouth is a dial tone.

Before he pulls you into the black cavernous throat of his, you have time to scream,

"Oh god. You were phone!??"

<a href=http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/words_that_end_in_gry.png>*cough*

Anyway, what happened in 1961 and will not happen again until 6009?

Link unrelated.

 

[SpaceSpork]

What has four legs in the morning,
Two in the afternoon,
and three in the evening?

Humankind, BEEYOTCH.

 

[roflchopter]

I forget what this is off of...
"The man who makes it, doesn't need it
The man who buys it, doesn't want it
The man who uses it, doesn't know it."

 

[SpaceSpork]

If I'm batman, who wins?

Jesus.

 

[brutus3933]

A lark may carry it, but the strongest man might not. Of what do I speak?

A tune?

 

[DeadlyYellow]

I forget what this is off of...
"The man who makes it, doesn't need it
The man who buys it, doesn't want it
The man who uses it, doesn't know it."

A Coffin.

Hmm. A few easy ones:
What gets wetter as it dries?

You are born with it, and will die with it. A rich man needs it. A poor man has it. What is it?

And of course, my favorites:
When is a door not a door?
When is a car not a car?

 

[halfeclipse]

I forget what this is off of...
"The man who makes it, doesn't need it
The man who buys it, doesn't want it
The man who uses it, doesn't know it."

That would be

Spoiler

A coffin

Edit:
Ninja'd D:

 

[Burst6]

Wrong, it's a baby. It crawls at first, but then if you cut off it's legs, it has two. Then, you give it a crutch and it hobbles on three.

Cookie for reference.

EDIT:Extreme logic fail typo gotten rid of.

Does he wear a green suit? Is he at arkham asylum?

Is my cookie approaching me?

 

[crudus]

the year will be the same... upside down.

very good.

On my way to the fair, I met 7 jugglers and a bear, every juggler had 6 cats, every cat had 5 rats, every rat had 4 houses, every house had 3 mouses, every mouse had 2 louses, every louse had a spouse. How many in all are going to the fair?

 

[Kimarous]

A lark may carry it, but the strongest man might not. Of what do I speak?

A tune?

Yep. Guess you've played Dragon Age, then.

 

[Snowalker]

What has four legs in the morning,
Two in the afternoon,
and three in the evening?

A human, walks on four leggs at birth, two during its mid-life, and walks with a cane when it gets old.

 

[kannibus]

What runs but does not walk?
What has a bed but doesn't sleep?

1) Mascara (as in "Men are like Mascara. They run at the first sign of emotion.")
2) Flowers (as in "A bed of roses")

Here's mine:

What keeps working even after it gets broken?

 

[KValentine]

*Snip*
Now for my own.
What is broken every time it's spoken?
[sub]Maybe that's not worded so well.[/sub]

Silence

Correct.

Feed me and I live. Give me water and I die.

A tomato, a turnip, and a pumpkin are on the bed of a truck. The truck approaches a sharp curve. What's the first to drop?

Fire.
The speed.

Correct on both.

 

[benbenthegamerman]

the year will be the same... upside down.

very good.

On my way to the fair, I met 7 jugglers and a bear, every juggler had 6 cats, every cat had 5 rats, every rat had 4 houses, every house had 3 mouses, every mouse had 2 louses, every louse had a spouse. How many in all are going to the fair?

one, because you met the jugglers and bear, but they werent going to the fair. only you were.

 

[Quad08]

"Rarely touched but often held, If you have wit you'll use me well."

For all you mages out there *wink*

riddle me this smoothieman! Where is there justice, yet no men to enforce law?

Spoiler

Antarctica.

Get it justice--just ice.

Shut up! I came up with it all on my own! It's the best I could do.



*cries in corner*

That was pretty good actually, made me laugh

 

[SultanP]

What has four legs in the morning,
Two in the afternoon,
and three in the evening?

A really weird goat!

 

[Shamgarr]

There is a locked room with three light bulbs inside, and three switches on the outside, each one connected to one bulb. There is no possible way to see inside the room. You are outside the room and can mess with the lights and go into the room. Once you go into the room you cannot leave, but you have to find out which light switch goes with which bulb. How do you go about doing this?

 

[Kufaz]

There is a ship full of people, but there is not a single person on this ship, how is this possable.

The ship is FULL which means that there is not one SINGLE person on the ship...So...no one is alone on the ship...they're together.

 

[Connosaurus Rex]

There is a ship full of people, but there is not a single person on this ship, how is this possable.

Easy they're all married